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27654598_2031425350433256_89162890810767

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"While it is true you learn with age, the down side is what you often learn is what a damn fool you were before"

Thomas Sowell

Posted

"How did you handle the transition from childhood to adulthood?"

"I'm eating steak in bed at 3:30 in the morning in my Batman jammies while I play video games. When the **** did the transition happen?

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

Posted

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I'm the enemy, 'cause I like to think, I like to read. I'm into freedom of speech, and freedom of choice. I'm the kinda guy that likes to sit in a greasy spoon and wonder, "Gee, should I have the T-bone steak or the jumbo rack of barbecue ribs with the side-order of gravy fries?" I want high cholesterol! I wanna eat bacon, and butter, and buckets of cheese, okay?! I wanna smoke a Cuban cigar the size of Cincinnati in the non-smoking section! I wanna run naked through the street, with green Jell-O all over my body, reading Playboy magazine. Why? Because I suddenly may feel the need to, okay, pal? I've SEEN the future. Do you know what it is? It's a 47-year-old virgin sitting around in his beige pajamas, drinking a banana-broccoli shake, singing "I'm an Oscar Meyer Wiene"

Posted

27337225_10155326637402444_5427029189093

  • Like 4

"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

Posted

A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the door.

 

The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push.

 

“Not a chance,” says the husband, “it is 3:00 in the morning!”

 

He slams the door and returns to bed.

 

“Who was that?” asked his wife.

 

“Just some drunk guy asking for a push,” he answers.

 

“Did you help him?” she asks.

 

“No, I did not, it’s 3am in the morning and it’s well pouring with rain out there!”

 

“Well, you have a short memory,” says his wife. “Can’t you remember about three months ago when we broke down, and those two guys helped us? I think you should help him, and you should be ashamed of yourself!

 

“God loves drunk people too you know.”

 

The man does as he is told, gets dressed, and goes out into the pounding rain.

 

He calls out into the dark, “Hello, are you still there?”

 

“Yes,” comes back the answer.

 

“Do you still need a push?” calls out the husband.

 

“Yes, please!” comes the reply from the dark.

 

“Where are you?” asks the husband.

 

“Over here on the swing,!”

  • Like 4

Thanks for shopping Pawn-O-Matic!

Posted

Fooling around with Google translate, a friend of mine found this little gem...

 

whatsapp_image_2018_02_10_at_6_57_19_pm_

whatsapp_image_2018_02_10_at_6_57_21_pm_

 

This is so pure, stupid, and amazing all at the same time.

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Posted

 That's how I've heard people describe it while praising it.

 

P.S.  This isn't bashing the movie. It looks entertaining but as a rule I don't watch Marvel films in theatres.

 

But, I laugh at those (like the poster make) calling this 'diverse'.

 

Then again, it is 2018, and jn 2018 'most diverse' means  black and no whites. Who cares about Asians, arabs, latinos, and others. Certainly  not the Diversity Crowd. :p

DWARVES IN PROJECT ETERNITY = VOLOURN HAS PLEDGED $250.

Posted

Depends on your definition of diversity, I guess. A predominately black superhero blockbuster in a world full of predominantly white superhero blockbusters makes the movie itself diverse even if the contents aren't. I'm guessing that's the interpretation used, in which case 'lol that's all the same ethnicity too' falls kinda flat. But snark is important too. :)

Posted

"makes the movie itself diverse"

 

No, it doesn't. The movie is not diverse. It is mostly an all black cast. There is nothing wrong with that, btw, but to call it a 'diverse' cast is a lie and then to go further and claim it's the 'most diverse film' ever is even more ridiculous. Again, the issue here is that the new age Diversity Crowd only think in terms of white vs black ignoring all the other races that exist.

 

Anyways, this is the funny thread.. So... to make a joke....

 

Nah. I'm not that funny.

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DWARVES IN PROJECT ETERNITY = VOLOURN HAS PLEDGED $250.

Posted

12654586_10153824443191291_4815277515259

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

Posted

 

Sad, but true. NSFW language (then again, why are you looking at videos at work without headphones? :p)

Why has elegance found so little following? Elegance has the disadvantage that hard work is needed to achieve it and a good education to appreciate it. - Edsger Wybe Dijkstra

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