Calax Posted September 10, 2014 Share Posted September 10, 2014 Maybe the Serb burger-flipping guy realises his Pterodactyl boss (Svetlana) is the love of his life, but the Americans feel that dino / human lurve is verboten. Cue a sort of fast food take on Romeo and Juliet. With, er, reptiles.... Is this the plot of your next book? Yeah, KaineParker's my new agent. Alright then, can you bang out a script for a romantic comedy based on the life of Eva Braun? Include plenty of Nazi jokes and leave the possibility of Hitler being gay open. If successful, I'll pitch a sequel involving Zombies and strippers, possibly with musical elements. And it needs to have a topless scene every 10 pages. Victor of the 5 year fan fic competition! Kevin Butler will awesome your face off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monte Carlo Posted September 10, 2014 Share Posted September 10, 2014 I'm starting my own business, currently I'm wading through the knee-deep bog of bureaucracy - but it really sounds more difficult than it actually is. Right now I'm waiting for my trade license. Also in one of the papers I had to assure that I'm not a smuggler, terrorist or some other kind of malevolent scoundrel. I had to laugh manically when I signed it. International hit-men don't apply for permission. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShadySands Posted September 10, 2014 Share Posted September 10, 2014 The wife knocked a shot glass into the garbage disposal so I spent the better part of an hour fixing that Free games updated 3/4/21 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cantousent Posted September 10, 2014 Share Posted September 10, 2014 I got up and visited the doctor today and verified that I have lost 100lbs (45.45k) since the end of February. I will lose another 70lbs before the end of next February. I've stopped being the mopey dopey loser who's letting himself go downhill. I might still be a pathetic loser, but I'll be a pathetic loser who'll look good in a muscle shirt again before he's 46. 10 Fionavar's Holliday Wishes to all members of our online community: Happy Holidays Join the revelry at the Obsidian Plays channel:Obsidian Plays Remembering tarna, Phosphor, Metadigital, and Visceris. Drink mead heartily in the halls of Valhalla, my friends! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PK htiw klaw eriF Posted September 10, 2014 Share Posted September 10, 2014 I got up and visited the doctor today and verified that I have lost 100lbs (45.45k) since the end of February. I will lose another 70lbs before the end of next February. I've stopped being the mopey dopey loser who's letting himself go downhill. I might still be a pathetic loser, but I'll be a pathetic loser who'll look good in a muscle shirt again before he's 46. And here I thought I did good for losing 30. Hats off bro. 1 "Akiva Goldsman and Alex Kurtzman run the 21st century version of MK ULTRA." - majestic "you're a damned filthy lying robot and you deserve to die and burn in hell." - Bartimaeus "Without individual thinking you can't notice the plot holes." - InsaneCommander "Just feed off the suffering of gamers." - Malcador "You are calling my taste crap." -Hurlshort "thankfully it seems like the creators like Hungary less this time around." - Sarex "Don't forget the wakame, dumbass" -Keyrock "Are you trolling or just being inadvertently nonsensical?' -Pidesco "we have already been forced to admit you are at least human" - uuuhhii "I refuse to buy from non-woke businesses" - HoonDing "feral camels are now considered a pest" - Gorth "Melkathi is known to be an overly critical grumpy person" - Melkathi "Oddly enough Sanderson was a lot more direct despite being a Mormon" - Zoraptor "I found it greatly disturbing to scroll through my cartoon's halfing selection of genitalias." - Wormerine "I love cheese despite the pain and carnage." - ShadySands Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hurlshort Posted September 10, 2014 Share Posted September 10, 2014 I got up and visited the doctor today and verified that I have lost 100lbs (45.45k) since the end of February. I will lose another 70lbs before the end of next February. I've stopped being the mopey dopey loser who's letting himself go downhill. I might still be a pathetic loser, but I'll be a pathetic loser who'll look good in a muscle shirt again before he's 46. Nice of you to check in with us Cant. Grats on the weight loss. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Woldan Posted September 10, 2014 Share Posted September 10, 2014 (edited) Thats some major ballast you dropped there, nice work. Now put that lost weight onto your barbells. I'm starting my own business, currently I'm wading through the knee-deep bog of bureaucracy - but it really sounds more difficult than it actually is. Right now I'm waiting for my trade license. Also in one of the papers I had to assure that I'm not a smuggler, terrorist or some other kind of malevolent scoundrel. I had to laugh manically when I signed it. International hit-men don't apply for permission. Its just that every hit man worth his salt needs a legal and clean place to launder his hard earned millions. Edited September 10, 2014 by Woldan 1 I gazed at the dead, and for one dark moment I saw a banquet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BruceVC Posted September 11, 2014 Share Posted September 11, 2014 I got up and visited the doctor today and verified that I have lost 100lbs (45.45k) since the end of February. I will lose another 70lbs before the end of next February. I've stopped being the mopey dopey loser who's letting himself go downhill. I might still be a pathetic loser, but I'll be a pathetic loser who'll look good in a muscle shirt again before he's 46. Hi Cant "waves" Nice to see you posting again "Abashed the devil stood and felt how awful goodness is and saw Virtue in her shape how lovely: and pined his loss” John Milton "We don't stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.” - George Bernard Shaw "What counts in life is not the mere fact that we have lived. It is what difference we have made to the lives of others that will determine the significance of the life we lead" - Nelson Mandela Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blarghagh Posted September 11, 2014 Share Posted September 11, 2014 I got up and visited the doctor today and verified that I have lost 100lbs (45.45k) since the end of February. I will lose another 70lbs before the end of next February. I've stopped being the mopey dopey loser who's letting himself go downhill. I might still be a pathetic loser, but I'll be a pathetic loser who'll look good in a muscle shirt again before he's 46. Congratulations and respect, man. Grandmother's funeral was today and I'm taking the rest of the day off. I know I should use my time to do something productive but screw it, not in the mood today. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enoch Posted September 11, 2014 Share Posted September 11, 2014 Today I've become a driving commuter. I'm not entirely happy about the change, but I don't want to be the guy who brings his 6-month-old kid on the subway in rush hour. The youngin' starts at the daycare facility in my office building on Monday, which was enough to convince the Powers That Be to grant me a parking pass for the garage under the building. So today was the dry run. Getting into work was roughly 15 minutes faster than the walk/subway I used to do, but it's probably unrealistic to project that I'll consistently be leaving the house this early once I'm toting the little one along. And the return trip will likely be in the thick of the afternoon rush, regardless. (The garage is set up in "departure zones" so that they can fit the maximum number of vehicles in. I got a permit for a 4:30 departure zone, which means that I double park into a big block of cars that all should be leaving at around 4:30.) What I'm going to need to account for is the degree to which this reduces the physical activity I get in the course of my daily life. I had been walking about 2 miles every day as part of my commute. I've never been the sort of person to seek out exercise for the sake of exercise. That might have to change soon if I want to maintain my present only-moderately-doughy physique. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hurlshort Posted September 11, 2014 Share Posted September 11, 2014 Ah, the wonderful life of working parents. Every morning I get up, make lunches for my two kids, wolf down breakfast, shower and get dressed, make two chocolate milks for the kids, poke and prod at my son until he is dressed while my wife handles the daughter, get him to the bathroom, help him brush, carry him to the car in a blanket, then load up the car, head over to grandma's, unload the kids and all their stuff, get back in the car, drop wife off at work, then drive myself to work. It ain't always pretty, but we get it done. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Namutree Posted September 11, 2014 Share Posted September 11, 2014 Watchin' Zest vs. Soulkey in the GSL Code S. For those who know what I'm talking about; congrats for good taste. "Good thing I don't heal my characters or they'd be really hurt." Is not something I should ever be thinking. I use blue text when I'm being sarcastic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enoch Posted September 11, 2014 Share Posted September 11, 2014 (edited) Ah, the wonderful life of working parents. Every morning I get up, make lunches for my two kids, wolf down breakfast, shower and get dressed, make two chocolate milks for the kids, poke and prod at my son until he is dressed while my wife handles the daughter, get him to the bathroom, help him brush, carry him to the car in a blanket, then load up the car, head over to grandma's, unload the kids and all their stuff, get back in the car, drop wife off at work, then drive myself to work. It ain't always pretty, but we get it done. What exactly are you putting in that chocolate milk?? Edited September 11, 2014 by Enoch 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PK htiw klaw eriF Posted September 11, 2014 Share Posted September 11, 2014 Ah, the wonderful life of working parents. Every morning I get up, make lunches for my two kids, wolf down breakfast, shower and get dressed, make two chocolate milks for the kids, poke and prod at my son until he is dressed while my wife handles the daughter, get him to the bathroom, help him brush, carry him to the car in a blanket, then load up the car, head over to grandma's, unload the kids and all their stuff, get back in the car, drop wife off at work, then drive myself to work. It ain't always pretty, but we get it done. What exactly are you putting in that chocolate milk?? Chloroform. 1 "Akiva Goldsman and Alex Kurtzman run the 21st century version of MK ULTRA." - majestic "you're a damned filthy lying robot and you deserve to die and burn in hell." - Bartimaeus "Without individual thinking you can't notice the plot holes." - InsaneCommander "Just feed off the suffering of gamers." - Malcador "You are calling my taste crap." -Hurlshort "thankfully it seems like the creators like Hungary less this time around." - Sarex "Don't forget the wakame, dumbass" -Keyrock "Are you trolling or just being inadvertently nonsensical?' -Pidesco "we have already been forced to admit you are at least human" - uuuhhii "I refuse to buy from non-woke businesses" - HoonDing "feral camels are now considered a pest" - Gorth "Melkathi is known to be an overly critical grumpy person" - Melkathi "Oddly enough Sanderson was a lot more direct despite being a Mormon" - Zoraptor "I found it greatly disturbing to scroll through my cartoon's halfing selection of genitalias." - Wormerine "I love cheese despite the pain and carnage." - ShadySands Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nepenthe Posted September 11, 2014 Share Posted September 11, 2014 (edited) Ah, the wonderful life of working parents. Every morning I get up, make lunches for my two kids, wolf down breakfast, shower and get dressed, make two chocolate milks for the kids, poke and prod at my son until he is dressed while my wife handles the daughter, get him to the bathroom, help him brush, carry him to the car in a blanket, then load up the car, head over to grandma's, unload the kids and all their stuff, get back in the car, drop wife off at work, then drive myself to work. It ain't always pretty, but we get it done. What exactly are you putting in that chocolate milk?? Chloroform.That's rolled up in a carpet, noob! Edited September 11, 2014 by Nepenthe 1 You're a cheery wee bugger, Nep. Have I ever said that? Reapercussions Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nonek Posted September 11, 2014 Share Posted September 11, 2014 Just returned from the Lakes and a self imposed media blackout, may I be so humble as to recommend this to all holidaying forum goers, quiet contemplation, good conversation, an interesting collection of reading matter, fine vittles, and a daily wander lonely as a cloud over simply breathtaking scenery. It was the very definition of relaxation and the lack of all electronic communications devices certainly added to that, one forgets how demanding and shackling these things are. 1 Quite an experience to live in misery isn't it? That's what it is to be married with children.I've seen things you people can't even imagine. Pearly Kings glittering on the Elephant and Castle, Morris Men dancing 'til the last light of midsummer. I watched Druid fires burning in the ruins of Stonehenge, and Yorkshiremen gurning for prizes. All these things will be lost in time, like alopecia on a skinhead. Time for tiffin. Tea for the teapot! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Malcador Posted September 11, 2014 Share Posted September 11, 2014 Another bust round of interviews. Some woman whose English was awful and some alpha-male suit d-bag. Why has elegance found so little following? Elegance has the disadvantage that hard work is needed to achieve it and a good education to appreciate it. - Edsger Wybe Dijkstra Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Woldan Posted September 12, 2014 Share Posted September 12, 2014 (edited) Went cycling, it was cold, windy, foggy, and very wet. And I totally crashed, funnily at the least dangerous part of my route. Don't know what happened, suddenly at 50 km/h or so on the straight my front wheel was instantly thrown to the right and before I could do any counter steering or breaking I was already doing somersaults down a slope into the woods. Luckily I didn't hit a tree, but the skin on my legs and arms itches and burns because a million nettles cushioned my fall. I could drive back home so I guess I have not broken any bones.Funny, I can have a million accidents but I never get hurt, not even a bruise or a scratch. My bike however, front brake is damaged, handlebar is bent, chain is damaged and I think my front wheel is losing air. I'm not sure what caused the accident but it could have been a technical defect. Very strange. Edited September 12, 2014 by Woldan I gazed at the dead, and for one dark moment I saw a banquet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Malcador Posted September 12, 2014 Share Posted September 12, 2014 Realized today that my office is a death trap if there's ever a crazed gunman on the loose here, only two exits out of the main work area and both lead into the same hallway. Too much RVS, I guess. Why has elegance found so little following? Elegance has the disadvantage that hard work is needed to achieve it and a good education to appreciate it. - Edsger Wybe Dijkstra Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Azdeus Posted September 12, 2014 Share Posted September 12, 2014 Went cycling, it was cold, windy, foggy, and very wet. And I totally crashed, funnily at the least dangerous part of my route. Don't know what happened, suddenly at 50 km/h or so on the straight my front wheel was instantly thrown to the right and before I could do any counter steering or breaking I was already doing somersaults down a slope into the woods. Luckily I didn't hit a tree, but the skin on my legs and arms itches and burns because a million nettles cushioned my fall. I could drive back home so I guess I have not broken any bones. Funny, I can have a million accidents but I never get hurt, not even a bruise or a scratch. My bike however, front brake is damaged, handlebar is bent, chain is damaged and I think my front wheel is losing air. I'm not sure what caused the accident but it could have been a technical defect. Very strange. A rock on the road maybe? Gremlins? Hearing what sometimes goes on in your home, maybe they went for a ridealong? Good to hear you're in one pieces atleast. 1 Civilization, in fact, grows more and more maudlin and hysterical; especially under democracy it tends to degenerate into a mere combat of crazes; the whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, most of them imaginary. - H.L. Mencken Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Woldan Posted September 12, 2014 Share Posted September 12, 2014 (edited) A rock on the road maybe? Gremlins? Hearing what sometimes goes on in your home, maybe they went for a ridealong? Good to hear you're in one pieces atleast. Aha, Gremlins! I didn't consider those, now everything makes sense! Or maybe I accidentally brought some angry elves form Iceland, who knows. I've heard they are masters of subterfuge and sabotage. Bastards. Realized today that my office is a death trap if there's ever a crazed gunman on the loose here, only two exits out of the main work area and both lead into the same hallway. Too much RVS, I guess.Just play dead. Its an office, nobody will question your health condition there. Edited September 12, 2014 by Woldan 1 I gazed at the dead, and for one dark moment I saw a banquet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lexx Posted September 12, 2014 Share Posted September 12, 2014 (edited) And I totally crashed, funnily at the least dangerous part of my route. Don't know what happened, suddenly at 50 km/h or so on the straight my front wheel was instantly thrown to the right and before I could do any counter steering or breaking I was already doing somersaults down a slope into the woods. Luckily I didn't hit a tree, but the skin on my legs and arms itches and burns because a million nettles cushioned my fall. I could drive back home so I guess I have not broken any bones. Heh, this is exactly what happened to me. The road was fine, really. Then suddenly my front wheel slips away to the right, I go off of the bike, got stuck between handlebar and brakes and that's the story of how I broke my hand. I rested for maybe 10 minutes and then continued back home. Luckily it was only approx 6km left. Edited September 12, 2014 by Lexx "only when you no-life you can exist forever, because what does not live cannot die." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Azdeus Posted September 12, 2014 Share Posted September 12, 2014 Aha, Gremlins! I didn't consider those, now everything makes sense! Or maybe I accidentally brought some angry elves form Iceland, who knows. I've heard they are masters of subterfuge and sabotage. Bastards. Hmm... that is a concern, you did'nt go rock climbing on any outcroppings or any other such Elfhill did you? If you did, you just might be fecked until you build a little home for them to stay in. :< 1 Civilization, in fact, grows more and more maudlin and hysterical; especially under democracy it tends to degenerate into a mere combat of crazes; the whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, most of them imaginary. - H.L. Mencken Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Woldan Posted September 12, 2014 Share Posted September 12, 2014 (edited) Heh, this is exactly what happened to me. The road was fine, really. Then suddenly my front wheel slips away to the right, I go off of the bike, got stuck between handlebar and brakes and that's the story of how I broke my hand. I rested for maybe 10 minutes and then continued back home. Luckily it was only approx 6km left.You need to crash like race car drivers, as soon as you realize you're no longer controlling the vehicle you are driving hands off the steering wheel or handle bar! I did that today, when I slipped off the road I stood up and got my hands off the handlebar. Looking at the bent handlebar I'm sure I would have at least twisted my wrists. Hmm... that is a concern, you did'nt go rock climbing on any outcroppings or any other such Elfhill did you? If you did, you just might be fecked until you build a little home for them to stay in. :<Oh no, now that you mention it I remember going off-trail many times at the Skaftafell national park, I might have stomped entire elven villages. My life is forfeit! Edited September 12, 2014 by Woldan 2 I gazed at the dead, and for one dark moment I saw a banquet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lexx Posted September 12, 2014 Share Posted September 12, 2014 Yeah, that would have saved my hand. I'll do it next time, if I can react fast enough. PS: It's 10 weeks now. My hand is in approx 90% of the condition it was before the accident. It's still swollen, but I can move all my fingers to a fist again. Obviously I still lack the muscle strength of before, but this will come back over time. I've got another date with the doctor next friday, and then hopefully I'll be allowed to get back to work. People in the office probably don't even remember my face... 1 "only when you no-life you can exist forever, because what does not live cannot die." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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