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Astounding Tales of Supernatural Serendipity: Memoirs from Xan's Detective Agency

Our Quest Is Vain!

“Things are as they are. Looking out into the universe at night, we make no comparisons between right and wrong stars, nor between well and badly arranged constellations.” – Alan Watts
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Eternity - A New Hope


Once they do that they can make the prequels, where we can then crucify them for destroying what we all hold dear.


Joking aside, I want to see what Obsidian have on their short list.

I'd like to see the short list too, but it would probably be something slightly spoilerific at this point, otherwise I'd think that they would've settled on something already.


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Eternity - A New Hope


Once they do that they can make the prequels, where we can then crucify them for destroying what we all hold dear.


Joking aside, I want to see what Obsidian have on their short list.


oh, you're onto something there :D


Eternity: Episode 1 - The Publisher Menace


An unnamed publisher is revealed. The Independent Studio Republic faces a new yet ancient enemy and his insidious plan, to take over the Kickstarter site and all it's successful projects from within by buying potentially successful projects and turning them into Crap-o-Games.


Meanwhile an Independent Studios Republic defender, the wise Obsidian - an RPG Programmer Knight, finds a project that might might be the Chosen One - who's powers are the subject of an ancient prophecy - the Chosen One will bring (back) balance to the Fanbase.


Eternity: Episode 2 - Attack of the Dumbofans


Facing internal struggle and border disputes, as other Studios have begun to attack the virtual content, and with increasing pressure from the Bank Clans (whom are secretly (?!?) financing both the Independent Studios Republic and the (Evil) Publishers), the Independent Studios Republic decides to create an army of Fans. Unknown to them such an army was already created by the legendary Protonicarts and Gizzard knights, at the hand of the Publishers, in the name of the Independent Studios Republic, for reasons that yet remain obscure, years ago.


This army is the dreaded army of Dumbofans, all being clones of the Mash-da-keyboard-dumb-da-game Fan. With the help of such an army the Independent Studios Republic crushes all opposition. Meanwhile the Chosen One is increasing in power but faces conflicting demands from the Fans.


Eternity: Episode 3 - Revenge of the Publisher


With the help of the Dumbofan army the Independent Studios Republic is able to land a decisive blow to the opposition thus practically ending the Dumbofan Wars. Faced with the death of his loved one, a vision foretold him, the Chosen One decides to join the secret Publisher Emperor, whom has promised infinite revenues and billions of units of fanpower in order to save his beloved - Eternita Repegeron, and thus betrays the Independent Studios Republic and the other knights. The Empire is proclaimed, by the Secret Publisher Emperor, with the following memorable speech:


"...and the RPG Programmer Knights rebellion has been foiled. The remaining programmer knights will be hunted down and converted. The attempt on my cashflow has left me scarred and deformed but i assure you, my resolve has never been stronger. In order to ensure the security and continuing stability, the Independent Studios Republic have been reorganized into the First Crap'o'game Empire, for a safe and secure gaming community."


Eternity: Episode 4 - A New Hope


The fabled programmer knights are all but extinct. Their flame has been extinguished and the Crap'o'game Empire has never been stronger. But a minority of Fans still fight for freedom and have organized themselves into a Repegillion, a rebellious band of misfits that are trying to overthrow the Publisher Emperor from the safety of their garages.


Meanwhile, and old RPG programmer knight finds a boy, Fluke Gamewalker, in a backwater garage and starts to teach him the ways of programming. After a psychedelic adventure, joined by the most unlikely companions (a virgin princess, a cute-face scoundrel, a furry speech impaired fur-ball, a smart-arse trash'o'can droid and a bling-made humanoid droid with the excessive speech perk, to make up for the speech impaired perk of the fur ball) they finally find the Death Cubicle, a majestic and invincible mega corporate giga central tera building with the power to create lots and lots of crap'o'games for lots and lots of Dumberofans (the more advanced Dumbofans are not enough to protect the Crap'o'game Empire so the Publisher emperor must accept Dumberofans into it's ranks). With the power of the Death Cubicle (that houses lots and lots of programmers) and the Dumberofans the Crap'o'game Empire is able to squash entire garages (or even upstart companies).


The boy, actually an adolescent, with the typical thick glasses stereotypical zips all over his face (and sometimes not-so-stereotypical Playboy magazines under his bed) is able, helped by his companions, to destroy the Death Cubicle. The programmer knight is killed by Darth Gamder.


Eternity: Episode 5 - The Publisher Strikes Back


Darth Gamder is trying to squash the Repegellion. He finally catches up to them in old storehouse, they are hiding in the freezer. Meanwhile Fluke goes to Silicon Valley where he meets up with another old (and forgotten) programmer knight. The knight teaches him all about old school games and some programming, and Fluke is amazed but still can't write that many commands in the prompt line. His training consists of endless "cd.." and Basic. He sometimes plays Betrayal at Krondor.


Darth Gamder manages to finally apprehend the virgin princess (and all the other non essential companions) and (kids, now's the time to close your eyes) tortures her and the other non essential companions. At least that was the original script.


Fluke has a vision with his friends be made to lpay hours upon hours of Diablo 3 and feels compelled to save them. He rushes to help them, against all advice (it seems that the programmer knight found a way to transfer their consciousness into silicon-based machines and are now able to speak through speakers and dots on the CRT screens).


Fluke meets Darth Gamder. Darth Gamder says he is his father, Fluke knows that the Chosen One is his father and his stack overflows. Critical error, Fluke looses his hand. The virgin princess saves him and manages to fdisk his MBR. The cute-face scoundrel is trapped on an 3.5 inch floppy disk.


Eternity: Episode 6 - Return of the Independent Studio


Fluke and his companions (they find yet another scoundrel, the scoundrel that betrayed them in the last episode but has since turned to the light side) manage to free the cute-face scoundrel and copy his information on a CD (and 3 more backup CD). His information is at first corrupted by the dreaded OneHalf virus but is able to unscramble the hexes and regains his vision, just in time to kill Grubba the SuperMarioShut and his minions.


Fluke goes back to the dying knight in silicon valley. He finds him incoherent from the booze but he manages to learn that he is the only one (a lie actually, the virgin princess also has da'powa) who can destroy the Publisher Emperor and Dath Gamder. The last words of the knight are:


"Fluke... remember your training. format c:"


The Repegellion finds out about Death Cubicle 2.0 alpha, and is planning on not letting it go to beta. Fluke travels to a hippy town, with his companions, where he is captured by his father, Darth Gamder. The companions, along side with the indigenous population of south-park-like miniature furr-covered hippies manage to bring down the firewall of Death Cubicle 2.0. As a raging battle ensues between the forces of the Crap'o'game Empire and the Repegellion, another battle ends on the top floor of the Death Cubicle 2.0. The Publisher Emperor is finally slain by the now redeemed Darth Gamder, Fluke realizez that his storyline is crap compared to his father's but still is happy that he is given a central role. Darth Gamder cries. Fluke burns him.


The Publisher Empire is no more. The Repegellion is victorious. The Chosen One brought balance to the fanbase. His kids (the looser Fluke and the virgin princess) are now aware of their gaming powers and they dance with the Odsidian Knight and all the slain rpg programmer knights 8 bit representation on an old monochrome CRT.


The End.
Edited by cealicu_ca
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"Against stupidity, the Gods themselves contend in vain."

- Isaak Yudovich Ozimov

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Soul Man: The Blue World (now with no darkspawn!)


Without C. Thomas Howell returning, it'd be "Soul Man" in name only...



I cannot - yet I must. How do you calculate that? At what point on the graph do "must" and "cannot" meet? Yet I must - but I cannot! ~ Ro-Man

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Eternity: Origins?


Please please please not yet another xxxxxx : yyyyyy title - if that makes sense. Eternity: Blablabla..., Dragon Age: Origins, Assassin's Creed: Revelations, ... I can't stand those stupid : titles anymore, they're just a running gag, dumb, normal... (and apparently even the word Origins is just a joke nowadays). Don't do what the big publishers do, use a classy name, just a single word would be best. 'Eternity' sounds just fine.

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I think Project: Eternity is a dreadful name, so hopefully that changes, but then: I think Planescape: Torment is an awful name. Here's some thoughts:


1) With Soul in the title. Others in the thread have come up with those, and they all end up sounding like some other game.

2) With a place in the name. Only Obsidian knows what the place is called, so we can't really help with that.

3) With Eternity in the name. Sounds to me like a kid's JRPG: all pastel colours and cartoon shading.

4) Working from the theme of persistent souls. Maybe something with Revenant or Incarnation in it? (Shame The Nomad Soul has been taken!)

5) Or how about a completely non-genre title? Instead of making this game sound like an RPG, why not go for something completely neutral in the same way that the developers have with Hawken and Dishonored?

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why not go for something completely neutral in the same way that the developers have with Hawken and Dishonored?


Hawken in the Gray Ward?

Edited by septembervirgin

"This is what most people do not understand about Colbert and Silverman. They only mock fictional celebrities, celebrities who destroy their selfhood to unify with the wants of the people, celebrities who are transfixed by the evil hungers of the public. Feed us a Gomorrah built up of luminous dreams, we beg. Here it is, they say, and it looks like your steaming brains."


" If you've read Hart's Hope, Neveryona, Infinity Concerto, Tales of the Flat Earth, you've pretty much played Dragon Age."

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C'mon, no references of Aerosmth's "Hole in my soul"? No "souljer" jokes?


As for a real name...




The Endless


Professor Boddfluid or: How I learned to stop worrying and love the soul


...Let's just say that I'm not the one that usually named our D&D campaigns.

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Eternity will mess up with search engine in the long run

without knowing of the plot line (I don't want to anyway), with an obvious tip of my hat:


Eternity - A Watcher's Torment


Perhaps Project Eternity might be the name if the soul involving plot is a grand design to achieve eternity.


A myth is like good wine or cheese, growing meaningful with age.

- From Excentric quotes form the Lorekeepers of the Obsidian Order -

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