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The Funny Things thread


LadyCrimson

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As someone who has filled two of those roles and knows people who fill the other three, that is the most truefact gaming strip ever written in the history of gaming strips. I kinda wish it had an entry for 3D Artists too.

Its kind of the same as the concept artist, where they just ask you to change things because either they changed their minds or the concept doesn't translate well into 3D. It could also be that I'm not that talented :(

I'd say the answer to that question is kind of like the answer to "who's the sucker in this poker game?"*

 

*If you can't tell, it's you. ;)

village_idiot.gif

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I don't know Lincoln's gun policies (or whether he had any at all to begin with) off-hand, but...not really? Because I support the U.S.'s particular brand of free speech, and for...say, for example, extremist Muslims and Christians to be able to verbally support what I would consider to be barbaric and/or otherwise awful policies and actions...doesn't mean I support those actual policies and actions, nor do I want them to follow me around and harass me by constantly shouting their support for those things at me, either. Just as I'm sure Lincoln could've supported the right to bear arms without supporting lunatics shooting other people in the face, nor miscreants who would do other forms of harm with firearms, or other false equivalencies such as the image above implies.

Edited by Bartimaeus
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How I have existed fills me with horror. For I have failed in everything - spelling, arithmetic, riding, tennis, golf; dancing, singing, acting; wife, mistress, whore, friend. Even cooking. And I do not excuse myself with the usual escape of 'not trying'. I tried with all my heart.

In my dreams, I am not crippled. In my dreams, I dance.

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As someone who has filled two of those roles and knows people who fill the other three, that is the most truefact gaming strip ever written in the history of gaming strips. I kinda wish it had an entry for 3D Artists too.

Its kind of the same as the concept artist, where they just ask you to change things because either they changed their minds or the concept doesn't translate well into 3D. It could also be that I'm not that talented :(

 

I doubt it, that's just clients being clients. :( The thing about clients is while they come to you to get the job done, they think they know how to do the job better.

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I put it there for the amusement, not the politics... shifty.gif

^ "The Funny Things thread"

 

Hey, it's not my fault it's not as funny or "ironic" as it initially seemed after a few moments of reflection, tongue.png. It is my fault for actually bringing it to attention, though, so you got me there. wink.png

Edited by Bartimaeus
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How I have existed fills me with horror. For I have failed in everything - spelling, arithmetic, riding, tennis, golf; dancing, singing, acting; wife, mistress, whore, friend. Even cooking. And I do not excuse myself with the usual escape of 'not trying'. I tried with all my heart.

In my dreams, I am not crippled. In my dreams, I dance.

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For the general snerk via the duffelblog

 

Marine ‘Emotionally Exhausted’ By Having To Plan To Kill Everyone He Meets

 

 


QUANTICO, Va. — Lance Cpl. Matt Bennet was admitted to Naval Medical Clinic Quantico with “emotional exhaustion” today after breaking down from the strain of “having a plan to kill everyone he meets,” according to sources in Bennet’s platoon.

 

“Like all real Marines, Bennet reveres Gen. [James] Mattis,” according to Bennet’s company commander, Capt. J.D. Maurer. “He takes the general’s orders, instructions and advice extremely seriously.”

 

“As do we all,” he added. “For instance, if I need to kill Bennet, I’m going to send him on a night march, and get him with a Claymore as he clears the tree line.”

According to fellow Marines, Bennet began the planning last summer at a Denny’s in Stafford, Va. “My platoon sergeant gave me 60 seconds to explain my plan to kill the waitress, the bus boy, and the short order cook,” Bennet said. “And it was easy.”

“Break my plate on the bus boy’s head,” he recounted. “Those Denny’s plates weigh like 10 pounds, so he’s incapacitated at least. Grab the waitress, drag her into the kitchen, and stab her in the carotid with her pen. Then shove the cook’s head into the fryolator until he stops thrashing. Probably takes 90 seconds, unless I have to circle back around to finish off the unconscious bus boy.”

 

After that, Bennet says, the plans got more challenging.

“I was on an exercise, riding in the back of a C-130. I’m asking the crew chief what this hose does, and where that wire goes,” he said. “I’m looking around at all the other Marines thinking, ‘The trick isn’t killing you. It’s not killing me while I do it.’”

 

According to his friend, Sgt. Peter Roark, things started to go wrong on a trip to the National Zoo.

“He’s like, ‘Do I even have to have a plan to kill the animals?’” Roark said. “I mean, we’re not technically meeting them, but they’re sort of around. And he’s going, ‘They’re in cages, so do I just need to have plans to kill the ones in the petting zoo?’ And then he’s all, ‘**** it, not like you can turn this off. That panda was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. He’s getting a goddamn plan.’”

 

Things got worse when he went to a Mattis book signing at Kramerbooks & Afterwards in Washington. Roark says when Bennet got to the front of the line, “Mattis looked straight at [Roark], and they both knew they had plans, but Mattis’ was better.” He spiraled quickly after that.

 

“I can’t even eat breakfast anymore,” Bennet said. “I look at my kids and I have like 20 options. I could start by — ” He stopped speaking suddenly and began to sob.

When asked if he had a plan to kill his commanding officer, Bennet hedged. “I don’t want to get in trouble. So let’s just say that I know about Capt. Maurer’s Claymore mine, and if I were him, I’d be careful about stopping for coffee at Dunkin Donuts at 0635 every morning.”

 

Marine Base Quantico spokesman Maj. Roger Antilles told reporters no charges were pending against Bennet.

“Also,” he said, “my plan to kill all of you is to use the firehose on this wall to herd you into a corner. I have already locked the exits. My M9 has 15 rounds, and I can garrote any survivors with their credential lanyards.”


 

"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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7w165Aw.png

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The words freedom and liberty, are diminishing the true meaning of the abstract concept they try to explain. The true nature of freedom is such, that the human mind is unable to comprehend it, so we make a cage and name it freedom in order to give a tangible meaning to what we dont understand, just as our ancestors made gods like Thor or Zeus to explain thunder.

 

-Teknoman2-

What? You thought it was a quote from some well known wise guy from the past?

 

Stupidity leads to willful ignorance - willful ignorance leads to hope - hope leads to sex - and that is how a new generation of fools is born!


We are hardcore role players... When we go to bed with a girl, we roll a D20 to see if we hit the target and a D6 to see how much penetration damage we did.

 

Modern democracy is: the sheep voting for which dog will be the shepherd's right hand.

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That's not funny. :( And all you guys complained about me...

Edited by Bartimaeus
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How I have existed fills me with horror. For I have failed in everything - spelling, arithmetic, riding, tennis, golf; dancing, singing, acting; wife, mistress, whore, friend. Even cooking. And I do not excuse myself with the usual escape of 'not trying'. I tried with all my heart.

In my dreams, I am not crippled. In my dreams, I dance.

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7w165Aw.png

 

That's kinda funny actually. There are countless of threads talking about taking up farming and general self-sufficiency, starting families with lots of children, giving up porn, basing life on strong principles and moral standards, and even spiritual fulfillment. 

 

If that is politically incorrect then allow me a nice, big laugh against the face of humanity.

Edited by Meshugger

"Some men see things as they are and say why?"
"I dream things that never were and say why not?"
- George Bernard Shaw

"Hope in reality is the worst of all evils because it prolongs the torments of man."
- Friedrich Nietzsche

 

"The amount of energy necessary to refute bull**** is an order of magnitude bigger than to produce it."

- Some guy 

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7w165Aw.png

 

That's kinda funny actually. There are countless of threads talking about taking up farming and general self-sufficiency, starting families with lots of children, giving up porn, basing life on strong principles and moral standards, and even spiritual fulfillment. 

 

If that is politically incorrect then allow me a nice, big laugh against the face of humanity.

 

They also have counteless threads about black on white crimes, police shootings and blame Jews for everything. Weird thing is that they're usually (always) right.

I'd say the answer to that question is kind of like the answer to "who's the sucker in this poker game?"*

 

*If you can't tell, it's you. ;)

village_idiot.gif

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What's REALLY funny is all this crying over a dead murderous evil lion in the West while innocents die all the time and the vitrilol doesn't even reach 1/1millionth of it.

 

I don't feel sorry for the lion. While I think killing animals for sport is a waste of time and not something I could do, I think judgemental baloney people spew over it is silly and unnatural.

 

People claiming that humans 'unnaturally' destroy nature or kill animals is really weak since everything humans do is what nature tells them to. The good, the bad, the ugly. It's all a part of nature. PERIOD.

 

Now, on to actual funny stuff: l0l @ the funny stuff added to thread.

DWARVES IN PROJECT ETERNITY = VOLOURN HAS PLEDGED $250.

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