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The Community Blog (An Invitation)
New Community Blog (The Unintentional Gatekeeping of Video Games)

The funny things thread

LadyCrimson
in Way Off-Topic

Featured Replies

The difference between the two can be pretty damn big, but it must be one hell of a rude awakening if it changes your gender!

 

I go through the five stages of grieving...

"It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"."

             -Elwood Blues

 

tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.

funny-soldier-girlfriend-letter_zpsbe7fd

"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

    •
    • Like 6

    Gamer jailed for biting another man's **** "like a sandwich"

     

     

    ad_118363879-e1382082145410.jpg?w=650&h=

     

    A man with two teeth who bit into his neighbour’s **** outside their block of flats in Dover, Kent, has been jailed for seven years.

     
    Jason Martin, 41, was asked if he would turn the volume down on his Xbox by a former friend.
     
    When the pair met outside, Martin bit through his victim’s pyjamas ‘like a sandwich’.
     
    Richard Henderson needed stitches to restore his pride.
     
    The victim had ‘never felt such excruciating pain like that before in his life’, Canterbury crown court heard.
     
    Judge Adele Williams added: ‘These were horrendous injuries but you have shown not one flicker of remorse.
     
    ‘I have no doubt that when you lost your temper you were determined to inflict as much pain and injury as possible.
     
    ‘You also set out to humiliate him by taking hold of his **** and testicles and gnawing at them.’
     
    When the gamer was arrested by police, he still had blood around his mouth.
     
    A jury found Martin guilty of wounding with intent. The judge added a further year to his sentence for dangerous driving.

    So, is Dover, Kent like the Florida of the UK or is this just an isolated incident?

     

    Edit:  I probably should have put this in "Weird News Stories".

    Edited by Keyrock

    sky_twister_suzu.gif.bca4b31c6a14735a9a4b5a279a428774.gif
    🇺🇸RFK Jr 2024🇺🇸

    "Any organization created out of fear must create fear to survive." - Bill Hicks

    • Like 1

    Such individuals are tolerated in Dover due to their exemplary work in deterring French visitors, I believe it's a lesser evil.

    Quite an experience to live in misery isn't it? That's what it is to be married with children.

    I've seen things you people can't even imagine. Pearly Kings glittering on the Elephant and Castle, Morris Men dancing 'til the last light of midsummer. I watched Druid fires burning in the ruins of Stonehenge, and Yorkshiremen gurning for prizes. All these things will be lost in time, like alopecia on a skinhead. Time for tiffin.

     

    Tea for the teapot!

    •
    • Like 3
    199596.strip.gif

    Why has elegance found so little following? Elegance has the disadvantage that hard work is needed to achieve it and a good education to appreciate it. - Edsger Wybe Dijkstra

    •
    • Like 6

    6474880_700b.jpg

    * YOU ARE A WRONGULARITY FROM WHICH NO RIGHT CAN ESCAPE! *

    Chuck Norris was wrong once - He thought HE made a mistake!

     

    1378206_10151739889313581_1174945270_n_z

    "Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

    •
    • Like 12

    uyiVwVA.gif

     

    How it feel if you stop by McD before clubbing.

    Fortune favors the bald.

    Thanks, now my stomach hurts from laughing! Ahaha! 

    All Stop. On Screen.

     

    Doesn't seem to work. All I can see is a small girl waving some books over her head.

    "It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"."

                 -Elwood Blues

     

    tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.

     

     

     

    Doesn't seem to work. All I can see is a small girl waving some books over her head.

     

    There should be a START button over her head. Have you tried reloading the page?

     

     

    Pressed that. Expands, then just sits there.

     

    Tried again now, same thing.

    "It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"."

                 -Elwood Blues

     

    tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.

     

     

     

     

    Doesn't seem to work. All I can see is a small girl waving some books over her head.

     

    There should be a START button over her head. Have you tried reloading the page?

     

     

    Pressed that. Expands, then just sits there.

     

    Tried again now, same thing.

     

     

    You can scroll down with down button

     

     

     

     

     

    Doesn't seem to work. All I can see is a small girl waving some books over her head.

     

    There should be a START button over her head. Have you tried reloading the page?

     

     

    Pressed that. Expands, then just sits there.

     

    Tried again now, same thing.

     

     

    You can scroll down with down button

     

     

    Tried that, didn't work.

     

    I HAVE played point and click adventure games, you know.

    "It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"."

                 -Elwood Blues

     

    tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.

     

     

    Doesn't seem to work. All I can see is a small girl waving some books over her head.

     

     

    OK it works if you use the up and down keys on your keyboard.

    "It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"."

                 -Elwood Blues

     

    tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.

    • Author

    (One profanity at the end. Just sayin'...)

    Having seen the Oz movie not too long ago...I lol'd.

     

    Still gaming with my 9900k/2080ti/32 ram. One day I suppose a game may inspire me to finally upgrade. Maybe. 

    • Like 2

    • Like 1
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    https://forums.obsidian.net/topic/64280-the-funny-things-thread/
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