Cop arrests daughter's boyfriend

[~Di]

Wow. It seems that most users of this forum identify more with a sex-hungry boy than the father of a potentially-impregnated 14-year-old girl. Big surpise, given the average age and gender of the board!

 

Seriously, sex with a girl that young is a very big deal. It could potentially damage her health and ruin not only her life, but her family's life as well. The boy? Bah, he'd just change girlfriends, get a few high fives from his friends, and go on as if nothing had ever happened. I guess one has to actually be the parent of a young teenaged girl to understand the potential ramifications of a sexual liason at that age. It's not the first time cops have used their position to scare youngsters straight. The boy wasn't actually placed under arrest, or even taken out of his own home. The boy's parents were right there. The officer didn't physically harm the boy, or threaten to physically harm him. And the officer also put the fear of God into his stepdaughter as well.

 

Boys and men in their hormonal youth don't see sex as a big deal, but females, especially young females, experience sex much differently. Because the stakes can be so high for females, they have much more of an emotional investment in the sexual act. And their parents know this.

 

I think a minor reprimand in the officer's file is enough. Some of you are acting like he whipped out his baton and taser and put the kid in the hospital. He didn't do anything of the sort.

Edited September 27, 2010 by ~Di

[Hurlshort]

I already stated I would have no trouble with my son being taught this lesson. If my 15-year old son wants to be man enough to have sex, then he is man enough to deal with a pair of handcuffs and a stern lecture.

[~Di]

I already stated I would have no trouble with my son being taught this lesson. If my 15-year old son wants to be man enough to have sex, then he is man enough to deal with a pair of handcuffs and a stern lecture.

 

I agree with you completely. Having raised five teenagers, both boys and girls, we made it quite clear to all of them that sexual activity was a risk that could potentially ruin the rest of their lives... including jail time if the age differences in their sexual partners was sufficiently illegal. We never ignored the aspect of sexuality, but we made damn sure our kids unstood the ramifications, and that "safe sex", most definitely necessary, was not always "safe."

 

I'm on your side here. I can totally see where the police officer was coming from, and can almost taste the fear, anger, and panic he must have been feeling. Fourteen is really, really young.

[Krookie]

Fourteen is also pretty young to be put in handcuffs and called a piece of s**t

[Orogun01]

Wow. It seems that most users of this forum identify more with a sex-hungry boy than the father of a potentially-impregnated 14-year-old girl. Big surpise, given the average age and gender of the board!

 

Seriously, sex with a girl that young is a very big deal. It could potentially damage her health and ruin not only her life, but her family's life as well. The boy? Bah, he'd just change girlfriends, get a few high fives from his friends, and go on as if nothing had ever happened. I guess one has to actually be the parent of a young teenaged girl to understand the potential ramifications of a sexual liason at that age. It's not the first time cops have used their position to scare youngsters straight. The boy wasn't actually placed under arrest, or even taken out of his own home. The boy's parents were right there. The officer didn't physically harm the boy, or threaten to physically harm him. And the officer also put the fear of God into his stepdaughter as well.

 

Boys and men in their hormonal youth don't see sex as a big deal, but females, especially young females, experience sex much differently. Because the stakes can be so high for females, they have much more of an emotional investment in the sexual act. And their parents know this.

 

I think a minor reprimand in the officer's file is enough. Some of you are acting like he whipped out his baton and taser and put the kid in the hospital. He didn't do anything of the sort.

Humans are fully capable to reproduce at fourteen, complications may ensue from childbearing but no bad effects come from the act itself. All that you describe is part of growing up, it's called making mistakes. I'm not saying that the father was wrong to feel as he did but the actions he took are close to criminal, plus it's the stepdaughter he shouldn't feel that attached. He could have taken the charade a lot further that is why he should be penalized, because he abused the trust we place on our legal system and it's representatives.

[~Di]

Humans are fully capable to reproduce at fourteen, complications may ensue from childbearing but no bad effects come from the act itself. All that you describe is part of growing up, it's called making mistakes. I'm not saying that the father was wrong to feel as he did but the actions he took are close to criminal, plus it's the stepdaughter he shouldn't feel that attached. He could have taken the charade a lot further that is why he should be penalized, because he abused the trust we place on our legal system and it's representatives.

 

First, I know humans can reproduce at 14. Humans can reproduce at 12... and 11. My point is that children... and these are children... becoming pregnant can ruin their lives, and potentially damage their health. And yes, bad effects can come from the act itself. As I've pointed out, females experience the sexual act much differently than males, both physicially and emotionally.

 

Second, I've raised both children and stepchildren and I'm here to tell you that yes, stepparents do indeed feel that attached to the child they have raised, just as adoptive parents do. What the officer did was a lapse in judgement caused by his own fear and anger over what could potentially have happened to his very young daughter. Nothing more.

Edited September 27, 2010 by ~Di

[Hurlshort]

I'm glad you are here Di. Now I can go put my kids to bed while you tell these young hooligans what it is to be a parent. I was starting to feel pretty alone here.

[Orogun01]

Humans are fully capable to reproduce at fourteen, complications may ensue from childbearing but no bad effects come from the act itself. All that you describe is part of growing up, it's called making mistakes. I'm not saying that the father was wrong to feel as he did but the actions he took are close to criminal, plus it's the stepdaughter he shouldn't feel that attached. He could have taken the charade a lot further that is why he should be penalized, because he abused the trust we place on our legal system and it's representatives.

 

First, I know humans can reproduce at 14. Humans can reproduce at 12... and 11. My point is that children... and these are children... becoming pregnant can ruin their lives, and potentially damage their health. And yes, bad effects can come from the act itself. As I've pointed out, females experience the sexual act much differently than males, both physicially and emotionally.

 

Second, I've raised both children and stepchildren and I'm here to tell you that yes, stepparents do indeed feel that attached to the child they have raised, just as adoptive parents do. What the officer did was a lapse in judgement caused by his own fear and anger over what could potentially have happened to his very young daughter. Nothing more.

They are not children, they are teenagers as soon as 14. They should be educated about sex and life in general, being prepared to face challenges and start working on who they are going to be for the rest of their lives. This is the first point at life where you are allowed serious responsibility and your first duties, they are going to make a lot of mistakes. Parents give a lot of sermons because they know this, they want to protect them, but it is inevitable that they will do this eventually. There is no magic that suddenly when you turn 18 you know right from wrong about sex. We learn by experience; point is that they did nothing wrong and the stepfather reacted very poorly.

[Calax]

Seriously, sex with a girl that young is a very big deal. It could potentially damage her health and ruin not only her life, but her family's life as well. The boy? Bah, he'd just change girlfriends, get a few high fives from his friends, and go on as if nothing had ever happened. I guess one has to actually be the parent of a young teenaged girl to understand the potential ramifications of a sexual liason at that age. It's not the first time cops have used their position to scare youngsters straight. The boy wasn't actually placed under arrest, or even taken out of his own home. The boy's parents were right there. The officer didn't physically harm the boy, or threaten to physically harm him. And the officer also put the fear of God into his stepdaughter as well.

I'm sorry, but no, just... no.

 

The boy was put in handcuffs by a fully uniformed officer in front of his parents and all were told he was being arrested for a sex crime. Now explain to me how being told "Your son's future just went to hell because I'm a vindictive daddy who is going to make it so people automatically lump your son in with child molesters when he's older and he won't be able to get a job worth a crap because of it!" isn't out of line?

 

I'm sorry, but people at any age, when encountering a uniformed police officer, will in general not get in the cops way. After all the guy A) has a gun B) can make your life a living hell C) has all of society viewing him as an infallible hero due to the culture of hero worship going on.

 

As to the whole "ruined a girls life while the guy just has high fives" I call bs. Have you seen what a woman can do to a guy who accidently knocked her up financially? That girl could make him be paying her for the next 15ish years (until the kid gets out of college...) due to the bias courts have towards women in these situations.

 

Also most times a cop uses their position like this, both sets of parents are in agreement about it and "conspire" to do it, rather than one single parent taking unilateral action.

 

And while the cop didn't physically harm or threaten to physically harm, he certainly threatened the hell out of the kid (if you bothered to watch the video, the cop is a complete jackass regarding both the boy, and his daughter who he talks about almost as if she was a pig in terms of hygiene) with probably more severe consequences (or did you miss the "if you go near my home, near my daughter, near my neighborhood, I will arrest you for real and charge you as a sex offender, and with assault" bit?)

 

And hurlie, I don't know about you, but I don't like the idea of not being able to parent my own kid. Sure, he can have sex, I can understand his want to, but I'd A) make sure that he knew about and at least pushed him to use protection and B) make sure he wasn't being a completely stupid git about it. I would HATE any parent that tried to butt in and do my job with my son because they thought I was being to lax or whatever.

 

The cop was out of bounds as a police officer, and as a parent. Completely, and utterly out of bounds. If that was my son, that officer would probably have been kicked out of the house with a threat of legal action related to trespassing, and if he laughed that off I'd have beaten the tar out of him for being such a presumptuous **** about his position. My kid, my rules, my punishments.

[I want teh kotor 3]

Physically speaking, at 14 she can handle the kid. Mentally speaking... well, thats why (as I said earlier) they have condoms and fetus-zappers... But in no way does screwing deserve to be handcuffed and ****...

[~Di]

Seriously, sex with a girl that young is a very big deal. It could potentially damage her health and ruin not only her life, but her family's life as well. The boy? Bah, he'd just change girlfriends, get a few high fives from his friends, and go on as if nothing had ever happened. I guess one has to actually be the parent of a young teenaged girl to understand the potential ramifications of a sexual liason at that age. It's not the first time cops have used their position to scare youngsters straight. The boy wasn't actually placed under arrest, or even taken out of his own home. The boy's parents were right there. The officer didn't physically harm the boy, or threaten to physically harm him. And the officer also put the fear of God into his stepdaughter as well.

I'm sorry, but no, just... no.

 

The boy was put in handcuffs by a fully uniformed officer in front of his parents and all were told he was being arrested for a sex crime. Now explain to me how being told "Your son's future just went to hell because I'm a vindictive daddy who is going to make it so people automatically lump your son in with child molesters when he's older and he won't be able to get a job worth a crap because of it!" isn't out of line?

 

I'm sorry, but people at any age, when encountering a uniformed police officer, will in general not get in the cops way. After all the guy A) has a gun B) can make your life a living hell C) has all of society viewing him as an infallible hero due to the culture of hero worship going on.

 

As to the whole "ruined a girls life while the guy just has high fives" I call bs. Have you seen what a woman can do to a guy who accidently knocked her up financially? That girl could make him be paying her for the next 15ish years (until the kid gets out of college...) due to the bias courts have towards women in these situations.

 

Also most times a cop uses their position like this, both sets of parents are in agreement about it and "conspire" to do it, rather than one single parent taking unilateral action.

 

And while the cop didn't physically harm or threaten to physically harm, he certainly threatened the hell out of the kid (if you bothered to watch the video, the cop is a complete jackass regarding both the boy, and his daughter who he talks about almost as if she was a pig in terms of hygiene) with probably more severe consequences (or did you miss the "if you go near my home, near my daughter, near my neighborhood, I will arrest you for real and charge you as a sex offender, and with assault" bit?)

 

And hurlie, I don't know about you, but I don't like the idea of not being able to parent my own kid. Sure, he can have sex, I can understand his want to, but I'd A) make sure that he knew about and at least pushed him to use protection and B) make sure he wasn't being a completely stupid git about it. I would HATE any parent that tried to butt in and do my job with my son because they thought I was being to lax or whatever.

 

The cop was out of bounds as a police officer, and as a parent. Completely, and utterly out of bounds. If that was my son, that officer would probably have been kicked out of the house with a threat of legal action related to trespassing, and if he laughed that off I'd have beaten the tar out of him for being such a presumptuous **** about his position. My kid, my rules, my punishments.

 

Well, we disagree. This is not a woman out to ruin some poor bloke's life because he did what guys do, which is have sex as often as possible. This is a very young girl, a child... and yes, a 14-year-old is a child dispite your attempt to raise the bar in that regard. Someday you may be the father of a young girl, one you love dearly, and might be able to identify with the risk to her future as much as you now identify with the this boy. The consensus here seems to be that hey, the boy had sex, that's what boys do, he did nothing wrong. As a parent and as a once 14-year-old teenaged girl pressured to have sex or be a boyfriendless wallflower, I can see the other side. *shrug* So we disagree, and suspect that we will continue to disagree for at least the next decade or so.

[Oblarg]

I find the implication that teenage guys are evil bastards out to exploit teenage girls for sex to be somewhat childish, really.

 

Teenagers have sex. It's a fact of life. The proper way to deal with it is to talk to your kid about safe sex, etc. It is not to go and scare the crap out of your daughter's boyfriend because you think she's too young to have sex, and it certainly is not to abuse the authority invested in you as a police officer to do so. This man was abusing his authority to aid him in an act of bad parenting - you can't really condone this ****?

Edited September 27, 2010 by Oblarg

[Calax]

See, here's the thing Di, you said specifically that the boy needed to be taught a lesson because he'd just be able to shrug off having impregnated the girl and thus should have been taught a lesson. I said that no, he wouldn't just be able to shrug it off.

 

Either way, the father was still way out of line professionally and personally.

 

 

Also, it's not "the boy had sex, it's what boys do" it's "The teens had sex, it's what teens do".

Edited September 27, 2010 by Calax

[Malcador]

Bringing up Hitler is a bit absurd. This cop broke rules, the problem with fascism is everyone is following rules.

 

You also don't stop being a father when you put on a uniform. I have a hard time taking away someone's livelyhood becauise he scared a dumb kid.

 

 

Seriously ? He should indeed lose his job for abusing his power like this, I'd imagine there are rules for police (although seeing the way they behave around here, that can be questioned). If he can't figure out that he's not to handle private business as a police officer, he should go.

 

But then again, it's the police. "Disciplinary" action to them is just a paid vacation. Not sure how the big issue here is the two kids having sex though, when compared to this cop misusing his power (and the fact it's private drama).

Edited September 27, 2010 by Malcador

[Walsingham]

Bit late on this one. This cop used his position for personal ends, making him a wanker. Cops like that give all cops a bad name, and the force he belongs to should pan him within the bounds of his other performance. i.e. if he has spent every other day in uniform saving lives and busting violent drug dealers then maybe cut him some slack.

[Volourn]

Cop should be fired, charged for various crimes he commited (starting with extreme abuse of power), thrown in prison, and and make it very clear that his actions were 100% wrong.

 

While the boy and girlm are pretty young to be having sex, they really did nothing all that immoral and did not deserve to be treated like trash since the true trash is this piece of crap should be ex cop.

 

'Nough said.

 

 

"Seriously, sex with a girl that young is a very big deal. It could potentially damage her health and ruin not only her life, but her family's life as well. The boy? Bah, he'd just change girlfriends, get a few high fives from his friends, and go on as if nothing had ever happened. I guess one has to actually be the parent of a young teenaged girl to understand the potential ramifications of a sexual liason at that age. It's not the first time cops have used their position to scare youngsters straight. "

 

Wow. I hate to say it but that sounds like sexism. The boy is 15. You don't think sex cna't potentially be huge for him. YUou also make it sound like all boys are evil sexual predators while girls are sexual victims who have no control or say. That's a a damaging train of thought for both genders as you make girls sound weak and pathetic. Don't forget a boy can be effected in multiple ways withs ex since while preganncy may not effect them physically it does have effect them for the rest of their lvie not to mention sexual disease.

 

This cop is a scumbag. And, anyone who supports him should be ashamed of supportm such an evil piece of crap. Plain, and simple.

Edited September 27, 2010 by Volourn

[Hurlshort]

I'm going to chalk Volourn disagreeing with me as a positive, which means it's me, Di, and Volourn versus everyone else. Ah well, where the heck is taks? I wonder what his opinion would be.

[Gfted1]

He hasnt been around since January. Wonder what happened to him.

[Volourn]

"I'm going to chalk Volourn disagreeing with me as a positive, which means it's me, Di, and Volourn versus everyone else."

 

Always causing trouble like the troll you are, I see. You shouldn't be speaking for me on this issue.

 

I said my piece about this scumbag cop who is just really a scumbag criminal in a cop's uniform.

[Tale]

A person who impersonates an officer can suffer legal consequences. An actual police officer faking official duties should get the same. I do not believe in double standards.

[Calax]

A person who impersonates an officer can suffer legal consequences. An actual police officer faking official duties should get the same. I do not believe in double standards.

I am in agreement here.

[Nepenthe]

A person who impersonates an officer can suffer legal consequences. An actual police officer faking official duties should get the same. I do not believe in double standards.

 

What about a police officer who pretends to be a person? Instead of a mindless tool for suppressing the proletariat?

 

(just standing in for LoF here)

[Trenitay]

While I can't really say he handled this right, I do like the guy's style. I guess I'm more in agreement with Hurlshot on this issue than with anyone else.

[Tale]

A person who impersonates an officer can suffer legal consequences. An actual police officer faking official duties should get the same. I do not believe in double standards.

 

What about a police officer who pretends to be a person? Instead of a mindless tool for suppressing the proletariat?

 

(just standing in for LoF here)

Well, that should be punishable too. I mean, you can't just not suppress the proletariat.

[Hurlshort]

There seems to be a vibe here that every cop should be like Robocop. Do you guys know any cops? They are just regular joes.