What You Did Today Thread

[Oerwinde]

My kids have driven me to a state of perpetual rage. I threw a fit because the dishwasher was left open before the dry cycle finished, then threw the broom upstairs, breaking a picture frame because it wasn't put back where it belonged. Sitting in the doctor's waiting room to see if I have depression or something.

[Hurlshort]

Yikes Oerwinde, sorry to hear that.  I'm not sure if this will help, but I've also had my fair share of rage moments with my kids.  You'd think being a middle school teacher would somehow give me more patience, but sitting down to do homework with my kids typically ends up with someone yelling and slamming doors.  The other day I even poured a glass of water over my daughter's head.  My wife pulled me aside and said it wasn't my finest moment, and after I calmed down, I had to agree.  

 

Here is the way the situation plays out:

 

I ask kid to do homework.  First I get whining, then I get an easily distracted child, then I raise my voice, then I get a meltdown, then I raise my voice again, I get a pity party, and then I threaten punishments.

 

Also, if I try to help her with strategies, I get "That's not how the teacher told us to do it!"  I'm a fricken teacher, I can handle 3rd grade math, thank you very much.  

 

So yeah, kids are tough.  Hope you get it worked out.  

[Oerwinde]

My son is the big problem. Came down the other day in the morning and he had dumped every bin of toys in the toy rack, and built a train out of the bins into the kitchen. He also dumped out the basket of magazines under the coffee table and spread those around the room, and dumped apple juice on the kitchen floor and didn't clean it up. It took us 2 days to get him to clean it all up, and the day after he did, we came down to see he did it again, plus climbed the bookshelf to get his sister's magic market maker set and spilled ink all over the carpet AND dining room floor.

 

So after making him clean part of that up we had to walk to get his sister at school only to find he had also pulled half the food in the freezer out and left it on the floor. This morning we got up and he had put a chair on the coffee table to get up on top of the bookshelves and broke and spread around my lego sets.

 

After the doctor we're buying a lock for his door so he can't get out of his room in the morning.

 

Edit:

Prescribed antidepressants. We'll see if it helps in the next couple weeks.

 

Edit 2: finished putting him to bed and found he had gotten into the medicine cabinet and dumped his sisters gold earings down the sink.

Edited January 31, 2016 by Oerwinde

[Gfted1]

^Hope you get to the place where you want to be.

 

I wouldn't touch a transmission with a 10' wrench, way out of my comfort zone.

[Guard Dog]

 

Also, if I try to help her with strategies, I get "That's not how the teacher told us to do it!"  I'm a fricken teacher, I can handle 3rd grade math, thank you very much.  

 

 

[Guard Dog]

Wow Oerwinde you do have your hands full. Best of luck. If it were a dog I'd prescribe lots of exercise. It works wonders on them.  But for a kid I wouldn't know which way to go.

[Woldan]

Today was the first time I did deadlifts after my 2.5 week long pause due to an injury I suffered from an accident. I didn't want to risk tearing my healing wound so I stayed well below my maxes, at about 75%  - 80% or so, but its still very satisfying to lift 200kg/450lbs for a couple of reps after such a long break.  Its like drinking cool water after a trip through the desert. 

 

Edited January 31, 2016 by Woldan

[Gromnir]

Wow Oerwinde you do have your hands full. Best of luck. If it were a dog I'd prescribe lots of exercise. It works wonders on them.  But for a kid I wouldn't know which way to go.

such scenario is one reason we avoided having a family o' our own.  working at a juvenile detention facility had a profound impact 'pon us.  hard to believe it were 17 years ago, but much o' what we saw changed us.  one such lesson we learned is that regardless o' parenting or environmental influences, some kids have... issues.  most common and least scary were the impulse control problems.  many kids we "counseled" down in j-unit (high security for rapists, murderers, 'n such) were nice kids, good kids.  'but they had a metaphorical switch that could be flipped.  relative innocuous comments or actions could turn otherwise good kids into uncontrollable rage monsters.  the terrible part is that some o' the kids with the impulse control problems knew they had lack o' self control and they felt genuine terrible 'bout what they had done while in their curiously altered state.  wasn't always a rage thing neither.  these kids simple didn't have the capacity for reflection and consideration before they acted in response to stimuli.  we met the parents o' these kids during visiting.  we talked with the kids and anybody else we could speak to who might have insights. yeah, most o' the time, the kids came from difficult backgrounds and broken families... but not all.  were terrible to see loving and obvious concerned parents and their otherwise good natured kids enduring yet another visiting day in juvenile hall.

 

actual worst juvenile hall experience we had were with the young kids.  the hall where we worked housed kids as young as 8-10 years o' age, and they were horrible. am not gonna get into all such details, but suffice it to say that the only time we would want to work in the little kiddie unit were at night, when they were asleep.  the savage stoopidity o' the crumb-snatchers prompted us to do a bit o' research and we discovered, to our surprise, that all kids are psychopaths.  am not kidding.  kids may be taught the differences 'tween right from wrong, but to know right from wrong is a different thing entirely.  what amounts to the conscience and capacity for empathy is not inherent qualities that all kids got from the moment they is birthed.  most kids develop empathy and conscience by ten, but others take til early teens. most kids simple don't have the brain chemistry to feel bad 'bout doing wrong til they is X years old?

 

we never wanted to have kids after we worked juvenile hall.  we gotta deal with a psychopath for near a decade, at which point there would be a chance (albeit small) that regardless o' parenting choices, the child would be... broken?  sorry, but no thanks.  also, while our grandparents did the majority o' our personal parenting, Gromnir's actual parents were kinda terrible at the job.  the possibility that we might inflict our parent's mistakes onto a child o' our own scared the notion o' child rearing right outta us.  

 

good luck to oerwinde.  you got our sympathies... and our sincere hope that you never have a fire during the night which would makes the locked door solution a larger tragedy.

 

am genuine not missing having kids o' our own.  spoil our relative's kids is more than enough for us.

[ManifestedISO]

Seriously it's positively apocalyptic outside. One poor lady was crushed inside her Civic hybrid by an eight-foot thick tree blown down by high winds in Pacific Beach. 

 

I can hear it right now ... windy and howling. There's a seventy-foot palm in the neighbor's yard ... if it comes down it will demolish the three-tone three-car standalone garage I just finished painting yesterday.  

[Guard Dog]

I'm driving to Austin Peay today to attend a meeting. I'm hoping it will be short. It won't be.

[Blarghagh]

My kids have driven me to a state of perpetual rage. [...] Sitting in the doctor's waiting room to see if I have depression or something.

Prescribed antidepressants. We'll see if it helps in the next couple weeks.

Wait, they prescribed you anti-depressants when you describe your main problem as perpetual rage? That's... odd? Depression is usually characterized by an absence of strong emotions or even emotions at all.

[BruceVC]

 

My kids have driven me to a state of perpetual rage. [...] Sitting in the doctor's waiting room to see if I have depression or something.

Prescribed antidepressants. We'll see if it helps in the next couple weeks.

Wait, they prescribed you anti-depressants when you describe your main problem as perpetual rage? That's... odd? Depression is usually characterized by an absence of strong emotions or even emotions at all.

 

Depression can manifest itself in different ways, rage may sound unusual but it can be caused by  forms of depression

[Blarghagh]

Um, no. You're confusing "depression" with "mood disorder". Depression is a specific disorder with specific symptoms.

Edited February 1, 2016 by TrueNeutral

[BruceVC]

Um, no. You're confusing "depression" with "mood disorder". Depression is a specific disorder with specific symptoms.

I dont think thats correct

 

See the link below and page 2 

 

http://health.howstuffworks.com/mental-health/depression/questions/link-between-depression-and-anger1.htm

[Blarghagh]

Yes, but if you check the source for those statements you'll find an outdated article that still classifies bipolar disorder (a.k.a. manic depressive disorder) as a form of depression which hasn't been the case for several years. Either way, bipolar depression is actually aggravated by using inhibitors, which 99% of antidepressants are. If you read it, you'll notice that they even point out that anger is not recognized as a symptom of depression by the DSM. But it's all a moot point considering there is a pretty big gap between anger and throwing stuff across the room rage.

 

EDIT: Either way, I'm not saying Oerwinde's doctor is wrong. I'm just expressing my surprise. I don't know what kind of diagnosis he got or which antidepressants he got, considering almost no doctor bothers to mention the difference between sedatives, inhibitors (actual antidepressants) and stimulants used to treat mood disorders. Which is unfortunate, because it has led to the idea that "antidepressants" are overprescribed and people who suffer from mood disorders like clinical depression are just whiny people who need to suck it up. Mental health is highly undervalued by society as a whole.

 

EDIT EDIT: Wow, the source for those claims is really bad. He spends half his time discussion films and cartoons and then claims on their basis that the DSM is wrong. He literally has two paragraphs talking about an Adam Sandler film in his serious article about anger in bipolar depression. I'm going to go with acknowledged, peer reviewed sources, thanks!

Edited February 1, 2016 by TrueNeutral

[Malcador]

Some guy jumped onto a busy intersection today. Rather surprised people are sharing photos of the tarp covered corpse.

 

Hopefully not many saw it happen. Likely too, given people being zombies when commuting in morning.

[BruceVC]

Yes, but if you check the source for those statements you'll find an outdated article that still classifies bipolar disorder (a.k.a. manic depressive disorder) as a form of depression which hasn't been the case for several years. Either way, bipolar depression is actually aggravated by using inhibitors, which 99% of antidepressants are. If you read it, you'll notice that they even point out that anger is not recognized as a symptom of depression by the DSM. But it's all a moot point considering there is a pretty big gap between anger and throwing stuff across the room rage.

 

EDIT: Either way, I'm not saying Oerwinde's doctor is wrong. I'm just expressing my surprise. I don't know what kind of diagnosis he got or which antidepressants he got, considering almost no doctor bothers to mention the difference between sedatives, inhibitors (actual antidepressants) and stimulants used to treat mood disorders. Which is unfortunate, because it has led to the idea that "antidepressants" are overprescribed and people who suffer from mood disorders like clinical depression are just whiny people who need to suck it up. Mental health is highly undervalued by society as a whole.

 

EDIT EDIT: Wow, the source for those claims is really bad. He spends half his time discussion films and cartoons and then claims on their basis that the DSM is wrong. He literally has two paragraphs talking about an Adam Sandler film in his serious article about anger in bipolar depression. I'm going to go with acknowledged, peer reviewed sources, thanks!

Sure, I get what you saying. But there are loads of links you will find about the link between depression and anger\rage if you don't like that one 

 

Here is another one

http://www.ehow.com/about_5038624_depression-anger-rage-symptoms.html

 

I haven't ever suffered from depression myself, that I am aware of.  but  I have lots of experience with it from people I know. In my own country when some of the most violent criminals and crimes are interrogated it goes like this in many occasions

" but why did you rape the wife and daughter ...why not just leave the family tied up and rob the house "

 

" I feel angry...I feel very angry..., I am unemployed, I have no purpose, I have no future " 

 

So in the South African  context we see some crimes being committed exactly because people are angry and depressed about there reality. Or rather it contributes towards the degree of violent crime we see 

Edited February 1, 2016 by BruceVC

[Blarghagh]

You clearly have a lot of experience with it, judging by the fact you obviously don't know what it is.

[BruceVC]

You clearly have a lot of experience with it, judging by the fact you obviously don't know what it is

Sarcasm much?

[Hurlshort]

 

You clearly have a lot of experience with it, judging by the fact you obviously don't know what it is

Sarcasm much?

 

 

Geez Bruce, just stop.  You don't have to chime in on everything.

[BruceVC]

 

 

You clearly have a lot of experience with it, judging by the fact you obviously don't know what it is

Sarcasm much?

 

 

Geez Bruce, just stop.  You don't have to chime in on everything.

 

No I don't have to respond to everything, but I can respond to statements I don't agree with

 

But thanks for explaining to me how a forum works ( yes thats sarcasm ) 

[Amentep]

If you read it, you'll notice that they even point out that anger is not recognized as a symptom of depression by the DSM. But it's all a moot point considering there is a pretty big gap between anger and throwing stuff across the room rage.

 

It may be important to remember - since we're being armchair psychologists - that as I recall the DSM actually doesn't consider excessive anger a disorder in and of itself, therefore may be poorly equipped to deal with anger as a specific problem.  This probably leads a caregiver to assume that the anger is a result of a previously diagnosed problems that isn't being properly corrected.

 

 In my own country when some of the most violent criminals and crimes are interrogated it goes like this in many occasions

" but why did you rape the wife and daughter ...why not just leave the family tied up and rob the house "

 

" I feel angry...I feel very angry..., I am unemployed, I have no purpose, I have no future "

 

What you post sounds more like rationalization than necessarily a link between depression and anger.

[Blarghagh]

That's true, but it does recognize it as a symptom of other disorders. Which leads me back to not knowing the diagnosis or medication (and Oerwinde is obviously under no obligation to reveal any of those things and I feel kinda bad his meds became a subject of debate, sorry Oerwinde). I'm just saying it's unlikely to be depression because anger is not a symptom of it.

 

Either way, I hope whatever they gave Oerwinde helps. I took an antidepressant called citalopram for a long time and it certainly helped me. It was, however, a complete bitch to stop taking. While I was weaning off I felt like I was being electrocuted all the time because my brain chemistry was changing. That lasted several months.

[ShadySands]

^I took that one for a while too but I think I had better luck with bupropion

 

PS yikes, I just counted and I've been on 6 different drugs for depression :/

Edited February 1, 2016 by ShadySands

[Hurlshort]

Speaking of moods, it must be Bruce's time of the month.  

 

 

 

misogyny!