What You Did Today

[Ben No.3]

Something I already said a few days ago but that I feel like fits the entire conversation about life, death and so on:

 

Okay, here is how I see the matter of life, death and the sense of life.

 

Try to envision your own death. What do you see? Black, maybe? Darkness? Or maybe you see your funeral? Your beloved, grieving at your coffin?

I can assure you, you do not see what will actually be the case: Your own non existance. No, not blackness. There will be no blackness. There will be nothing, because you yourself won't be. But our minds are limited. They are not capable to envision their own non-existance. So, we conclude that that simply cannot be the case. That there will be no end.

But everywhere we look, we see death. That is in great contrast to what our mind has concluded. But rather than questioning it's conclusion, it tries to combine the two. We want there to be a reason. A reason why all of this happened. Why we can not live forever. Why we live in the first place if it all has an end.

 

In our search for a meaning we create our own meanings. Most notably, we create religions. And with it, we create the idea of an afterlife. We create the idea of being chosen by a god or gods. We create the idea of having a greater purpose, a greater task, something else than sheer survival and procreation. In conclusion, we create the idea of a meaning of life.

 

And that thought stuck with us. The idea of being meant for some greater purpose is extremly encouraging. The idea of being chosen by a higher power is extremly uplifting. The idea of having a protective good we can relate to in desperate times is extremly comforting. So resenting these ideas is hard for us, especially wince we have been brought up with them.

 

But I think that happyness lies in acceptance of the fact that there is no greater purpose. That life has no meaning. That it will all end, that end is unavoidable, that there is no higher power or afterlife to reward us for what we have done in our lifetime. And while this may at first seem very decouraging, there lies beauty in senselessness and the randomness of life. Because if there is no greater meaning to everything, if our very existance is a short spike of randomness in an universe where everything must come to an end and nothing lasts forever, then that means that we have no greater meaning to pursuit in life other than that what we choose to pursuit.

 

We create our own meaning. And by doing so, by taking controll over who we are, by giving meaning to the meaningless. And I find it extremly uplifting and encouraging that who I am lies in no hands but my own. We have the ability to think. So why should we waste what little time we have following false ideas? Why not start thinking on your own?

[Guard Dog]

I had to go into Covington to the feed store. I brought Sunny with me because I'm trying to teach her manners in public and they don't mind her coming in anyway. On the way back I saw there was no line at the church where the early voting poll is set up. So I stopped and took care of that too. And no one minded Sunny being in there either. Everyone wanted to meet her in fact. I love small town life. You can get away with a lot more that would never fly down in Memphis.

[WDeranged]

Getting myself off the subject of death.  I did that thing where you realise you're chasing a girl too enthusiastically, thinking about her too much.  So you back off a bit, but she ups her charm level and you end up all smitten again, resisting the urge to send flowery texts.

 

I'm such a rookie at this stuff, it feels like playing games but I'm really just trying to avoid looking like a desperate fool 

[algroth]

In my experience, chasing a girl too enthusiastically can lead to alienating her somewhat. If she doesn't want to have anything to do with you, best to resist the urge and look elsewhere, there'll always be many other girls out there after all. I tend to not try twice nowadays after a first few bad experiences. :D

[WDeranged]

In my experience, chasing a girl too enthusiastically can lead to alienating her somewhat. If she doesn't want to have anything to do with you, best to resist the urge and look elsewhere, there'll always be many other girls out there after all. I tend to not try twice nowadays after a first few bad experiences. :D

 

I've made that mistake before but I think I managed to catch myself this time.  She obviously wants to spend time with me, I'm just super wary of the friend zone 

[ShadySands]

Just tell her how you feel and let the cards fall where they may

 

PS that may be terrible advice but I'm not one for games. Always worked for me anyway

Edited November 5, 2016 by ShadySands

[Malcador]

In my experience, chasing a girl too enthusiastically can lead to alienating her somewhat. If she doesn't want to have anything to do with you, best to resist the urge and look elsewhere, there'll always be many other girls out there after all. I tend to not try twice nowadays after a first few bad experiences. :D

For some reason, first thing that came mind when chasing a girl was trying to disable her as to make pursuit easy.

[teknoman2]

 

In my experience, chasing a girl too enthusiastically can lead to alienating her somewhat. If she doesn't want to have anything to do with you, best to resist the urge and look elsewhere, there'll always be many other girls out there after all. I tend to not try twice nowadays after a first few bad experiences. :D

For some reason, first thing that came mind when chasing a girl was trying to disable her as to make pursuit easy.

 

if you know how to use them, bolas are a great way to catch her without damaging her legs

[Longknife]

I'm depressed.

[melkathi]

That's why you have us. Our posting can be very uplifting *nodnod*

 

 

But I am off to the NanoWrimo meeting. And I dislike NanoWrimo and my notebook is broke so I can't write.

[Ben No.3]

I'm depressed.

Then get professional help. Trust me, that is the best way to tackle it. Where do you live? maybe we  can help you somehow... find out where you could drop by and so on

[Gfted1]

Ive been out of the game for so long that I probably couldn't pick up a woman in a whorehouse. Good luck WD!

 

My neighbor and I plan on going fishing this morning at daybreak.

[Hurlshort]

I am super thankful I hooked up with my wife before the days of all the internet dating, that's for sure.  

[Guard Dog]

My advice to anyone who wants it. Get married between the ages of 24 and 39. By 24 you have lived a little, had fun, sown the oats, etc. It gets repetitive. After 39 you are pretty set in your ways and will have difficulty adjusting to someone else. But more importantly you and anyone you meet will have been through a lot of relationships by that point. And since they are not married many of them may have been bad ones. By this time people are so emotionally damaged that can no longer trust and probably shouldn't be trusted. It's sad to say the the people who have been betrayed are often the ones who wouldn't bat an eyelash about betraying someone else.

 

If you have a working relationship/marriage etc. Hold onto it. Do what you must, sacrifice what you must, grind whatever grist the mill requires to keep it healthy. It is a prize of great worth and far less common than you'd believe. 

[Malcador]

I'm depressed.

If you kill yourself don't inconvenience others by jumping in front of traffic or a subway.

[Longknife]

 

I'm depressed.

Then get professional help. Trust me, that is the best way to tackle it. Where do you live? maybe we  can help you somehow... find out where you could drop by and so on

 

 

I did. That's part of the problem. I'm even being "kicked out" because my psychologist...well, she seems to believe I'm quite mentally capable, healthy and quite mentally "self-aware" as she put it. Initially that was a compliment in the sense I don't think too many people are chased off by therapy because the psychologist can't find a problem with you or your reasoning/handling of problems, but here I am and I still feel overly sensitive or quick to melancholy.

 

Found myself getting really upset over something so trivial and stupid, and that's bothersome. I shouldn't be bothered by it, yet I am. I can't help that, and shaming myself over that obviously doesn't help. The simple fact I'm easily bothered by something stupid though...? Like wtf did I get a terrible psychologist? Is this just my life? Do I have to live with being super self-critical, easily saddened by quarrels or little problems I see with the way the world works? Am I just a sad individual by default? And if my psychologist is bad, it took years to get around to going to one. To wait years and then to walk out feeling like I've gained nothing at all and like I'm still on my own, that's not a good feeling.

 

It's especially not good because I'm already hard-wired that I keep problems to myself. Part of the reason I even make that post...? Can't bring myself to talk to most people about my problems out of fear of being a burden or making the problem worse, so just "vent" somewhere anonymous where no one has to care. Even so I've written up long explanations of my problem at various places and backspace/deleted them multiple times. Why? Cause it's embarassing and people judge. Usually I have the stance of "screw it" because I believe EVERYONE has things about them that are embarassing to confess to, and if I confess to them that doesn't make me better or worse, it just makes me more transparent. Cool, I like that. I like letting people know exactly who I am. There is some value to being able to own up to your worst moments and your downsides. With stuff like depression though or issues where you're sensitive? All it takes is one asswipe stating "LOL UR PATHETIC" and the problem worsens, so once again I save it for me.

 

Overall though, I've just got a beef that's got me down, and when I think about how I wanna discuss it...I did get help, and help told me I'm a healthy, mentally sound individual that should be proud of how self-aware I am, and that all I need is a little work, activity and support and I'll be able to cope with my issues myself. I don't feel proud, I just feel sad, and like no matter what I do I'm always gonna be "alone" with my problems while others constantly come to me for support. (which yes, happened today)

[Longknife]

 

I'm depressed.

If you kill yourself don't inconvenience others by jumping in front of traffic or a subway.

 

 

This asswipe right here. It's a good thing he's too obvious about his spite and hatefulness or I'd probably value that statement enough to do it.

[Malcador]

Not hateful, that was practical advice for a potential plan. They do it via subways here a lot, which is awful as they give the drivers PTSD from it. Rather selfish, when you think about it.

Edited November 5, 2016 by Malcador

[algroth]

So far, went on a walk with my mum (who's leaving tonight for a trip to the US for two weeks), got back to find my kitchen completely flooded due to a hole on my thermotank. :excl:

Edited November 5, 2016 by algroth

[teknoman2]

i got bitten by a cat today. i was petting it and i saw that there was some mud stuck on it's neck so i tried to get it off. apparently my attempt was painful for the cat and since my arm was near its mouth, it bit me a little above the wrist. fortunately my jacket stopped 3 of the fangs from reaching me but the bite was so hard that one of the fangs managed to scratch my skin. i washed it, rubbed some alcohol on it and then added some betadine for greater effect. i have some left over antibiotics from a couple of months ago so i will take a pill too after dinner just to be safe. you can never be too careful with animal bites. if i see anything wrong with it by tomorrow i will go to the hospital

[Longknife]

Not hateful, that was practical advice for a potential plan. They do it via subways here a lot, which is awful as they give the drivers PTSD from it. Rather selfish, when you think about it.

 

Listen, I don't know if you're playing dumb or legitimately so, but do not joke about such a thing with someone who mentions they're depressed.

I'm not someone that would act on that (at least I don't think), but plenty would. If someone were to kill themselves because you or someone else made a comment like that? That's negligence at it's absolute worst, so I don't care how seriously you take someone when they talk about depression or suicide, do not make remarks like that. If you can't say anything else, don't say anything period.

[Gfted1]

Caught a smallmouth bass and gave it to a dude a few poles down who was eyeing it enviously. As repayment he offered to give me some home made "Mexican carp bait" if I show up next Saturday.

 

Now maybe some lunch and a restart of Stellaris. I think I need to build a giant murderfleet before I explore too much.

[Azdeus]

i got bitten by a cat today. i was petting it and i saw that there was some mud stuck on it's neck so i tried to get it off. apparently my attempt was painful for the cat and since my arm was near its mouth, it bit me a little above the wrist. fortunately my jacket stopped 3 of the fangs from reaching me but the bite was so hard that one of the fangs managed to scratch my skin. i washed it, rubbed some alcohol on it and then added some betadine for greater effect. i have some left over antibiotics from a couple of months ago so i will take a pill too after dinner just to be safe. you can never be too careful with animal bites. if i see anything wrong with it by tomorrow i will go to the hospital

 

Did it manage to catch you near a tendon? My cat bit my mother in the wrist once, she had to go on sick leave for 4 weeks due to the infection in the tendon that came after. That said, she waited a bit too long to go to the doctors.

 

I love my current cat, for once, the cat is predictable unlike many other cats we've had.

[Malcador]

 

 

Not hateful, that was practical advice for a potential plan. They do it via subways here a lot, which is awful as they give the drivers PTSD from it. Rather selfish, when you think about it.

Listen, I don't know if you're playing dumb or legitimately so, but do not joke about such a thing with someone who mentions they're depressed.

I'm not someone that would act on that (at least I don't think), but plenty would. If someone were to kill themselves because you or someone else made a comment like that? That's negligence at it's absolute worst, so I don't care how seriously you take someone when they talk about depression or suicide, do not make remarks like that. If you can't say anything else, don't say anything period.

Hm, not seeing anything negligent. Others aren't my responsibility to begin with, but wasn't encouragement to do so just a consult on the implementation they choose.

 

Have to get our furnace replaced so today is going to be talking to sales people a lot. Wonderful, but 16 years is probably near the EOL of the unit, so can't be avoided (well, it can, we'd just need to do without heat)

[teknoman2]

 

i got bitten by a cat today. i was petting it and i saw that there was some mud stuck on it's neck so i tried to get it off. apparently my attempt was painful for the cat and since my arm was near its mouth, it bit me a little above the wrist. fortunately my jacket stopped 3 of the fangs from reaching me but the bite was so hard that one of the fangs managed to scratch my skin. i washed it, rubbed some alcohol on it and then added some betadine for greater effect. i have some left over antibiotics from a couple of months ago so i will take a pill too after dinner just to be safe. you can never be too careful with animal bites. if i see anything wrong with it by tomorrow i will go to the hospital

 

Did it manage to catch you near a tendon? My cat bit my mother in the wrist once, she had to go on sick leave for 4 weeks due to the infection in the tendon that came after. That said, she waited a bit too long to go to the doctors.

 

I love my current cat, for once, the cat is predictable unlike many other cats we've had.

 

no, it's a finger length above the wrist and it's just a superficial scratch, the fang didn't go in