LadyCrimson Posted February 19, 2015 Posted February 19, 2015 Previous thread of funnies 3 “Things are as they are. Looking out into the universe at night, we make no comparisons between right and wrong stars, nor between well and badly arranged constellations.” – Alan Watts
Agiel Posted February 19, 2015 Posted February 19, 2015 (edited) For the second book, my cat definitely thinks it's the latter. If I leave a room he's in I have to have either a spray bottle with water or a rolled up newspaper to ward him away from attacking my leg. Edited February 19, 2015 by Agiel 1 Quote “Political philosophers have often pointed out that in wartime, the citizen, the male citizen at least, loses one of his most basic rights, his right to life; and this has been true ever since the French Revolution and the invention of conscription, now an almost universally accepted principle. But these same philosophers have rarely noted that the citizen in question simultaneously loses another right, one just as basic and perhaps even more vital for his conception of himself as a civilized human being: the right not to kill.” -Jonathan Littell <<Les Bienveillantes>> Quote "The chancellor, the late chancellor, was only partly correct. He was obsolete. But so is the State, the entity he worshipped. Any state, entity, or ideology becomes obsolete when it stockpiles the wrong weapons: when it captures territories, but not minds; when it enslaves millions, but convinces nobody. When it is naked, yet puts on armor and calls it faith, while in the Eyes of God it has no faith at all. Any state, any entity, any ideology that fails to recognize the worth, the dignity, the rights of Man...that state is obsolete." -Rod Serling
Keyrock Posted February 19, 2015 Posted February 19, 2015 (edited) Some The Order 1886 humor (strong language): Edited February 19, 2015 by Keyrock 4 RFK Jr 2024 "Any organization created out of fear must create fear to survive." - Bill Hicks
Raithe Posted February 19, 2015 Posted February 19, 2015 50 Shades of Klingon? 8 "Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."
Malcador Posted February 19, 2015 Posted February 19, 2015 http://arstechnica.com/business/2015/02/time-warner-cable-calls-customer-ct-after-she-reports-cable-box-problem/ NSFW image...well language in the image anyway. 1 Why has elegance found so little following? Elegance has the disadvantage that hard work is needed to achieve it and a good education to appreciate it. - Edsger Wybe Dijkstra
Namutree Posted February 19, 2015 Posted February 19, 2015 http://arstechnica.com/business/2015/02/time-warner-cable-calls-customer-ct-after-she-reports-cable-box-problem/ NSFW image...well language in the image anyway. I wish some one at Charter would call me names so I can get free cable/internet. "Good thing I don't heal my characters or they'd be really hurt." Is not something I should ever be thinking. I use blue text when I'm being sarcastic.
ShadySands Posted February 19, 2015 Posted February 19, 2015 Me too Good thing they bought out all the competition in order to offer me more choice 2 Free games updated 3/4/21
Fighter Posted February 19, 2015 Posted February 19, 2015 (edited) Edited February 19, 2015 by Fighter 3
kirottu Posted February 20, 2015 Posted February 20, 2015 2 This post is not to be enjoyed, discussed, or referenced on company time.
Fighter Posted February 20, 2015 Posted February 20, 2015 Don't know what happened to my gif but here it is again. 9mb 2
Raithe Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 Mildly amusing for a card game.. "Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."
Sarex Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 Don't know what happened to my gif but here it is again. 9mb If you look carefully you can see a pair of hands throwing the cat. "because they filled mommy with enough mythic power to become a demi-god" - KP
Sarex Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 As I said above, they throw the cat in, you can see the hands. Loses on funny points for that. "because they filled mommy with enough mythic power to become a demi-god" - KP
Volourn Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 It actually makes the way the cat lands even funnier. DWARVES IN PROJECT ETERNITY = VOLOURN HAS PLEDGED $250.
Raithe Posted February 23, 2015 Posted February 23, 2015 To go with the musical interlude.. http://youtu.be/oi7KPDi_yQI 3 "Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."
Malcador Posted February 23, 2015 Posted February 23, 2015 Why has elegance found so little following? Elegance has the disadvantage that hard work is needed to achieve it and a good education to appreciate it. - Edsger Wybe Dijkstra
Rostere Posted February 23, 2015 Posted February 23, 2015 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0yGJYryj-QY "Well, overkill is my middle name. And my last name. And all of my other names as well!"
Raithe Posted February 23, 2015 Posted February 23, 2015 The Toast - Empowered Female Heroine A Day in the Life of an Empowered Female Heroine She woke up like she did every day: slowly pulling her motorcycle helmet off, then shaking her head slowly back and forth to reveal a long, blonde ponytail. Everyone gasped. “That’s right,” she said, kicking the winning football goal before sliding into a sheer, sexy camisole under a blazer and playing as hard as she worked, “I’ve been a girl this whole time.” One of the guys, the real sexy one, shook his head in slow motion, as if to say “wh-wh-wh-whaaat?” You know the kind. His mouth was kind of open while he did it. He was totally blown away. She walked off the field, and she knew everyone was looking at her butt, and she totally loved it. “Sorry, boys,” she called out over her super-sexy shoulder. She always called men boys, because she knew what gender was. Now she was carrying a briefcase and wearing a pencil skirt and sex glasses. She was at law. “Your Honor,” she said, and the Honor paid attention, “I’d like to win this case,” and she totally did, she totally beat that busted-looking male lawyer who had the mushy face and wore suits that didn’t fit. She gave a little fist-pump, because even though she’s tough, she’s still relatable. “Girl power,” she said, high-fiving her curly-haired friend, who had just appeared behind her. “Girl, you need a drink,” her curly-haired friend said, “and I need a man.” She laughed because her curly-haired friend didn’t really get it yet, but she was getting there. *** She strolled up to the bar and planted a firm-yet-sexy pump-encased foot down on the rail. The bartender looked at her and started pulling out little frilly umbrellas and Malibu and speared slices of pineapple to make some kind of girl drink, but she held up her hand. “A whiskey,” she said, her voice low in her throat. “Neat.” Behind her the pool table exploded. Every man in the bar immediately grew a beard. The jukebox made a record-scratching sound, even though it was an mp3-playing jukebox. Her lawyer partner was there too. “Buy you a drink?” he asked. “I can’t be bought,” she said. Later, after they did it, she slipped out of bed and briskly put on her clothes. “You’re leaving?” he asked, full of feelings. “Sorry, babe,” she said, turning to leave. “You knew what this was.” She threw a thong at him, to remember her by. It was totally awesome, the way he wanted to be her boyfriend but she was too busy and cool to care. “Thanks for all the doing it. But I have to go win a karate tournament.” *** “Yeah, I get it,” she said. “Like a contest. Like a boys against the girls thing.” “Not exactly…there’s no reason to make this a conte–“ “Like a contest,” she said firmly. “Girls versus guys. Prove once and for all who’s really the toughest.” “I don’t see what this has to do with toughness,” he began. “The girls are totally going to win,” she said, “You’re a bunch of sexists.” She could win at everything. She could change a tire and dance in a ballgown in the same ten minutes. Maybe with a little streak of grease over her cheekbone, to remind you that she was tough and beautiful, and also to remind you how good her cheekbones were. Now she was wearing a pretty dress but combat boots underneath it, and she also had a gun, to fight sexism. She looked so good. She kicked a guy in the face, and she didn’t even care. “Feminism,” she said to herself, and then put on some red lipstick. “Just because I’m a feminist doesn’t mean I don’t like to look good.” Then she kicked another guy through a window, and he fell all the way. He was probably dead. She had like four guns strapped right on her boobs. *** “I’m sorry, Miss, but we really do have to go–“ “It’s Doctor, actually,” she smirked. The guys were totally shocked. They’d been talking about the doctor they were supposed to meet like it was some old guy, but it was her the whole time. “According to this scroll, all the prophecies are going to explode,” she explained. “Let me run some tests in my hacking lab. I’m a very important scientist.” She had so many abs, too. So many abs. “I can hold my own in the bedroom and the boardroom,” she said to no one, and to everyone. “You should never underestimate me.” She took off her blonde ponytail and shook her hair loose; there was another blonde ponytail underneath it. 3 "Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."
Malcador Posted February 23, 2015 Posted February 23, 2015 1 Why has elegance found so little following? Elegance has the disadvantage that hard work is needed to achieve it and a good education to appreciate it. - Edsger Wybe Dijkstra
Raithe Posted February 23, 2015 Posted February 23, 2015 Or for that Star Wars edge... http://youtu.be/mBz--oWMvWU "Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."
Raithe Posted February 24, 2015 Posted February 24, 2015 1 "Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."
Barothmuk Posted February 24, 2015 Posted February 24, 2015 I've yet to hear an explanation of pan-sexuality that doesn't sound like complete bull****.
teknoman2 Posted February 24, 2015 Posted February 24, 2015 I've yet to hear an explanation of pan-sexuality that doesn't sound like complete bull****. probably means a person who will have sex with everything that can be defined as a living being regardles of age, gender or species The words freedom and liberty, are diminishing the true meaning of the abstract concept they try to explain. The true nature of freedom is such, that the human mind is unable to comprehend it, so we make a cage and name it freedom in order to give a tangible meaning to what we dont understand, just as our ancestors made gods like Thor or Zeus to explain thunder. -Teknoman2- What? You thought it was a quote from some well known wise guy from the past? Stupidity leads to willful ignorance - willful ignorance leads to hope - hope leads to sex - and that is how a new generation of fools is born! We are hardcore role players... When we go to bed with a girl, we roll a D20 to see if we hit the target and a D6 to see how much penetration damage we did. Modern democracy is: the sheep voting for which dog will be the shepherd's right hand.
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