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A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the (Obsidian) Forum


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Posted

Marsupials of Unusual Size

I had one on my backyard once, they seem pretty chill.

I'd say the answer to that question is kind of like the answer to "who's the sucker in this poker game?"*

 

*If you can't tell, it's you. ;)

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"While it is true you learn with age, the down side is what you often learn is what a damn fool you were before"

Thomas Sowell

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

Posted

My favorite Opossum encounter was at night, walking in the front gate, it was sitting on the fence a few feet away hissing at me.

 

Good times, good times.

 

They're generally pretty cool animals if you keep your distance, to be fair, though.

I cannot - yet I must. How do you calculate that? At what point on the graph do "must" and "cannot" meet? Yet I must - but I cannot! ~ Ro-Man

Posted

IRISH CURFEW JOKE

 

A Sergeant and a Private were patrolling the streets in a Irish town near the Northern Irish border.

 

There was a 9.00PM curfew in place.

 

Suddenly private Slattery shoots a man walking down a lane.

 

The sergeant screams, Slattery its only 8.45, why did you shoot him.

 

Slattery replied, well I know where he lives and he would never have made home it by 9.00.

 

:)

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Thanks for shopping Pawn-O-Matic!

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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The words freedom and liberty, are diminishing the true meaning of the abstract concept they try to explain. The true nature of freedom is such, that the human mind is unable to comprehend it, so we make a cage and name it freedom in order to give a tangible meaning to what we dont understand, just as our ancestors made gods like Thor or Zeus to explain thunder.

 

-Teknoman2-

What? You thought it was a quote from some well known wise guy from the past?

 

Stupidity leads to willful ignorance - willful ignorance leads to hope - hope leads to sex - and that is how a new generation of fools is born!


We are hardcore role players... When we go to bed with a girl, we roll a D20 to see if we hit the target and a D6 to see how much penetration damage we did.

 

Modern democracy is: the sheep voting for which dog will be the shepherd's right hand.

Posted (edited)

Whoa, phrasing!

Edited by Azdeus

Civilization, in fact, grows more and more maudlin and hysterical; especially under democracy it tends to degenerate into a mere combat of crazes; the whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, most of them imaginary. - H.L. Mencken

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

Posted (edited)

An Irishman declares war on Saddam Hussein!

 

Saddam Hussein is sitting at home when the phone rings. He picks it up and says "Hello". The voice at the end of the phone says "Hello Mr. Hussein, it's Paddy here. I'm just ringing to let you know that we've declared war on your country." SH smiles to himself, "Come on Paddy", he says, "there's no point you declaring war on us, you wouldn't stand a chance." Paddy replies, "No, no,we've had ourselves a meeting, and we've decided to declare war on you."

 

So SH says, "OK Paddy, now listen, I've got an air force of over a thousand planes, what kind of air force have you got to match that? It'd be over in no time." So Paddy says, "Well my lad's got himself a hot-air balloon, and my brother used to work at an airport."

 

Hussein laughs, "Oh come on, you've not got a hope". "Hold on a sec, Mr.Hussein, ", Paddy says, "we'll just have a quick meeting." So off he goes and has a quick meeting. "Are you still there Mr. Hussein? Yes, well we've had our meeting, and we've decided that we're still going to declare war."

 

So SH says, "Right then Paddy, well you know, as well as the air force, we've also got about a thousand tanks. How are you going to match that.""Well," Paddy says, "I've got an old JCB, and my cousin down the road has got a tractor." "Get real, " says SH, "that's no match at all."

 

So Paddy says, "Hold on, I'll just go and have another meeting.""Are you still there Mr. Hussein? Yes, well we've had our meeting, and we've decided that we're still going to declare war." SH thinks this is just amazing, "Well how many soldiers have you got Paddy?". "Well," says Paddy, "there's me, my kid, me 4 cousins, and they all had sons, and there's Bill down the road..along with the local Darts team.. I reckon I could get together about 30."

 

Laughing openly now SH replies, "Come on Paddy, I've got 10,000 highly trained fighting men at my disposal. I think you'd better go and have another meeting." "I will", says Paddy,

 

""Are you still there Mr. Hussein? Yes, well we've had our meeting, and we've decided that we're not going to declare war on you after all." "At last, " replies SH, "What made you change your mind?""

 

Well, it's those 10 thousand soldiers you see. We can't declare war on you because we've not got the facilities to keep all those prisoners!"

Edited by Fiach
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Thanks for shopping Pawn-O-Matic!

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I know of some older boy & girl scouts that plan on having a detective-theme larp adventure in the woods.

 

People responsible for the organization plan on burying a plastic skeleton somewhere in the ground for the participants to dig it out.

 

It would be a shame if there was a real police patrol in the vicinity.

It would be of small avail to talk of magic in the air...

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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