As long as there are hints that what you are going to do could get you killed then I think you are right. I'd hate for a dialogue option to be:
Game: Pick left or right.
Player: Erm, Right.
Game: You died.
Player: What??? You piece of s*&$!
Those old fantasty books where you rolled a die at certain points to determine the outcome were full of those situations. Plus some older cRPG's had them a lot, thankfully not so much now.
I don't mind dying from the choice, just that the possible outcome is clear before making the choice.
Reninds me of our GM messing with us by having us open a door and finding a Bloodthirster in a storage room. I agree though, as long as it's evident (not obvious though) that you can get killed through a choice, that's fine. As for reloading, I see no problem with reloading if you die to try again, it gets silly when you do things like, in the Witcher, reloading to give the kid to Shani instead of Triss to see the different outcome.