Monte Carlo Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 So, in a mash-up worthy of Saturday Night Live parody, Bio might do a WH40K title (the veracity of this intelligence is irrelevant, the idea is too delicious not to explore). Furthermore, it's a FPS. Bioware doing a FPS. It's like Justin Bieber covering Marilyn Manson. Let us consider what a Bioware-helmed WH40K game might look like. How do you shoehorn emo romance into the grimdark WH40K universe? Will the Blood Raven romance-able companion keep his helmet on whilst having diaper sex? Will there be a busty pirate **** somewhere in the game? Will there be a cut-scene every time you kill an Ork? Will they recycle the same level fifty times? Please, help me predict the plot, NPCs and combat (which should be casual-player-friendly). Will Sheryl Chee implement a FPS shooter's first ever no-shooting mode? Let the games begin. 1
Oner Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 You noob! It's a TPS! Get it right! Giveaway list: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1DgyQFpOJvyNASt8A12ipyV_iwpLXg_yltGG5mffvSwo/edit?usp=sharing What is glass but tortured sand?Never forget! '12.01.13.
Nonek Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 (edited) In space no one can hear you squee. In the grim darkness of the the fourty first millenia there is only politically correct pandering. Introducing the newest Adeptus Astartes chapter - the White Knights of LBGTZPbarbecue. Conversation wheel: Upper right - Burn the Heretic. Middle right - Kill the Mutant. Lower right - Purge the Unclean. Have you ever licked a lampost in winter? FOUL SERVANT OF SLAANESH, HOW DARE THOU ACCOST A FAITHFUL SERVANT OF THE GOLDEN THRONE WITH SUCH VILE QUESTIONS? THY FOUL FLESH SHALL KNOW THE CLEANSING FIRE OF THE EMPERORS JUSTICE, AND WITH EACH SCREAM I SHALL PURIFY THY WICKED SOUL, DEVIANT HERETIC! Ghazghkull Mag Uruk Thraka - Romanceable or not? Edited May 5, 2013 by Nonek 6 Quite an experience to live in misery isn't it? That's what it is to be married with children.I've seen things you people can't even imagine. Pearly Kings glittering on the Elephant and Castle, Morris Men dancing 'til the last light of midsummer. I watched Druid fires burning in the ruins of Stonehenge, and Yorkshiremen gurning for prizes. All these things will be lost in time, like alopecia on a skinhead. Time for tiffin. Tea for the teapot!
Malcador Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 So that wasn't just some BS rumour on a Swede's blogger? Why has elegance found so little following? Elegance has the disadvantage that hard work is needed to achieve it and a good education to appreciate it. - Edsger Wybe Dijkstra
PK htiw klaw eriF Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 It will be have multiplayer co-op romances. 1 "Akiva Goldsman and Alex Kurtzman run the 21st century version of MK ULTRA." - majestic "you're a damned filthy lying robot and you deserve to die and burn in hell." - Bartimaeus "Without individual thinking you can't notice the plot holes." - InsaneCommander "Just feed off the suffering of gamers." - Malcador "You are calling my taste crap." -Hurlshort "thankfully it seems like the creators like Hungary less this time around." - Sarex "Don't forget the wakame, dumbass" -Keyrock "Are you trolling or just being inadvertently nonsensical?' -Pidesco "we have already been forced to admit you are at least human" - uuuhhii "I refuse to buy from non-woke businesses" - HoonDing "feral camels are now considered a pest" - Gorth "Melkathi is known to be an overly critical grumpy person" - Melkathi "Oddly enough Sanderson was a lot more direct despite being a Mormon" - Zoraptor "I found it greatly disturbing to scroll through my cartoon's halfing selection of genitalias." - Wormerine "I love cheese despite the pain and carnage." - ShadySands
melkathi Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 So that wasn't just some BS rumour on a Swede's blogger? I think it was That said... Honestly, when looking at the backstory, especially from a "grim, gritty, we are all doomed" first edition point of view and not the "musclebound military awesomeness" later editions, there is a lot which could be explored in an interesting RPG, that goes beyond FPS and "burn the heretic". It would sadly (because as it probably shows I feel that all work on GW franchises has steadily deteriorated over the years) it would have to explore a niche of the franchise, but it could become interesting. Still, there is enough drama in the main 40k backstory as it is, to not rule out character development. The story of the Thousand Sons would have made for great inspiration. Fulgrim's pride and fall are a bit more boring, but still. The Dark Angels, both with their dark secret but also specific instances: Cloud Runner who, after the genestealers nearly wiped out his homeplanet, left the legion to lead his people. Then there is the old novel Space Marine, that explores the lives of three young men from the same hive, but from different levels, who are recruited into the Imperial Fists at the same time and from dispicing each other have to form a bond of brotherhood. 40k has a lot of potential for interesting character building and tension. It just has, in the main franchises, no space for romance and sex. The most fun they could have with the franchise though would have been in a rogue trader or necromunda setting. 1 Unobtrusively informing you about my new ebook (which you should feel free to read and shower with praise).
Nonek Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 I think Obsidian could do miracles with that those ideas you mention Melkathi, Bioware not so much. 1 Quite an experience to live in misery isn't it? That's what it is to be married with children.I've seen things you people can't even imagine. Pearly Kings glittering on the Elephant and Castle, Morris Men dancing 'til the last light of midsummer. I watched Druid fires burning in the ruins of Stonehenge, and Yorkshiremen gurning for prizes. All these things will be lost in time, like alopecia on a skinhead. Time for tiffin. Tea for the teapot!
Hurlshort Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 Warhammer is just those plastic figurines that people paint, right? I don't really play with toys, so I don't know what the big deal is. 1
Malcador Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 I don't think anyone thinks that you can't make a 40K RPG, the setting has enough. Might be boring to be a Marine, but you could be an IG or an Inquisitorial servant or a Rogue Trader (RT is more fun as you're less of a mook ). Why has elegance found so little following? Elegance has the disadvantage that hard work is needed to achieve it and a good education to appreciate it. - Edsger Wybe Dijkstra
Nonek Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 Plastic! They were lead in my day. Yeah like any setting with twenty or so years of heritage, the Warhammer IP possesses a lot of potential to build upon. Quite an experience to live in misery isn't it? That's what it is to be married with children.I've seen things you people can't even imagine. Pearly Kings glittering on the Elephant and Castle, Morris Men dancing 'til the last light of midsummer. I watched Druid fires burning in the ruins of Stonehenge, and Yorkshiremen gurning for prizes. All these things will be lost in time, like alopecia on a skinhead. Time for tiffin. Tea for the teapot!
Monte Carlo Posted May 5, 2013 Author Posted May 5, 2013 Warhammer is just those plastic figurines that people paint, right? I don't really play with toys, so I don't know what the big deal is. Hockey sticks? Skates? Big plastic helmets? Toys I'm telling you. Toys.
Hurlshort Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 Warhammer is just those plastic figurines that people paint, right? I don't really play with toys, so I don't know what the big deal is. Hockey sticks? Skates? Big plastic helmets? Toys I'm telling you. Toys. You know I play video games, but you go after the manly sport I play instead? Interesting strategy
Malcador Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 Hockey is manly ? That why you guys wear all that armour ? Why has elegance found so little following? Elegance has the disadvantage that hard work is needed to achieve it and a good education to appreciate it. - Edsger Wybe Dijkstra
Hurlshort Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 Hockey is manly ? That why you guys wear all that armour ? Space Marines are manly? That why they wear all that armor?
NOK222 Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 Oh noes! Don't mess with ma gritty space marines! Oh get over yourselves 40k fans. Ka-ka-ka-ka-Cocaine!
HoonDing Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 I want to be a Void Dragon. The ending of the words is ALMSIVI.
Agiel Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 (edited) Without Relic at the helm, who have shown the license the love and attention it deserves, I'm unsure of any other developer being given the opportunity to take a bash at it... Unless Bioware makes my lifelong dream come true of a good Devil May Cry/Bayonetta-style action game featuring a Harlequin Solitaire: Space Marines? Pfffttt... How about space elf ninja clowns whose weapons include a hollow tube you shove into a man's chest, from which razor wires uncoil from and rotor-blade his insides into soup? Or soul-less goddesses of close combat that will slaughter even the toughest Space Marine army you can throw at her? Edited May 5, 2013 by Agiel Quote “Political philosophers have often pointed out that in wartime, the citizen, the male citizen at least, loses one of his most basic rights, his right to life; and this has been true ever since the French Revolution and the invention of conscription, now an almost universally accepted principle. But these same philosophers have rarely noted that the citizen in question simultaneously loses another right, one just as basic and perhaps even more vital for his conception of himself as a civilized human being: the right not to kill.” -Jonathan Littell <<Les Bienveillantes>> Quote "The chancellor, the late chancellor, was only partly correct. He was obsolete. But so is the State, the entity he worshipped. Any state, entity, or ideology becomes obsolete when it stockpiles the wrong weapons: when it captures territories, but not minds; when it enslaves millions, but convinces nobody. When it is naked, yet puts on armor and calls it faith, while in the Eyes of God it has no faith at all. Any state, any entity, any ideology that fails to recognize the worth, the dignity, the rights of Man...that state is obsolete." -Rod Serling
Malcador Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 Space Marines are manly? That why they wear all that armor? Well, militaries risk death with their job when they wear it, you people..not so much (actually isn't all that armour posing a problem with head injuries, etc?) Why has elegance found so little following? Elegance has the disadvantage that hard work is needed to achieve it and a good education to appreciate it. - Edsger Wybe Dijkstra
aluminiumtrioxid Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 I always wanted a Dark Heresy-based CRPG... but whyyyyyyy Bioware? "Lulz is not the highest aspiration of art and mankind, no matter what the Encyclopedia Dramatica says."
alanschu Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 (edited) Warhammer is just those plastic figurines that people paint, right? I don't really play with toys, so I don't know what the big deal is. It's better known for blatantly ripping off StarCraft! Edited May 5, 2013 by alanschu 5
Malcador Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 It's better known for blatantly ripping off StarCraft! Man, what ignorance. Warhammer ripped off Warcraft. Why has elegance found so little following? Elegance has the disadvantage that hard work is needed to achieve it and a good education to appreciate it. - Edsger Wybe Dijkstra
AGX-17 Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 So, in a mash-up worthy of Saturday Night Live parody, Bio might do a WH40K title (the veracity of this intelligence is irrelevant, the idea is too delicious not to explore). Furthermore, it's a FPS. Bioware doing a FPS. It's like Justin Bieber covering Marilyn Manson. Let us consider what a Bioware-helmed WH40K game might look like. How do you shoehorn emo romance into the grimdark WH40K universe? Will the Blood Raven romance-able companion keep his helmet on whilst having diaper sex? Will there be a busty pirate **** somewhere in the game? Will there be a cut-scene every time you kill an Ork? Will they recycle the same level fifty times? Please, help me predict the plot, NPCs and combat (which should be casual-player-friendly). Will Sheryl Chee implement a FPS shooter's first ever no-shooting mode? Let the games begin. Source? For the record, I think 40k is a terrible setting, but the concept here is genuinely hilarious. "Features: multiple space marine romances to pursue!"
aluminiumtrioxid Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 I think 40k is a terrible setting Ignorant heretic! Burn! Buurn! BUUUUURNNNNN!!! "Lulz is not the highest aspiration of art and mankind, no matter what the Encyclopedia Dramatica says."
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