Pop Posted September 18, 2012 Share Posted September 18, 2012 (edited) Perhaps some of you who have been around for awhile will remember this man, Mr. Matt MacLean. He was systems lead on Alpha Protocol and did some work on Fallout: New Vegas before taking a much-deserved design lead role on the forthcoming South Park game, a role he is well-suited to. Mr. Matt MacLean was well known around these parts for his luxurious Alpha Protocol Production Beard. What is a Production Beard, you ask? Why, it's a Beard, grown during Production of a game such as this one. The Beard owner must abstain from shaving from the time of the game's announcement, until the day it ships, in order to have a certified Production Beard. Such Beards are imbued with mysterious power and good luck, and are crucial to the successful completion of a project. . The reason for this topic is obvious: Project Eternity must have its very own Production Beard. But who shall bear the burden of such a crucial mission? It is my belief that, when grafted to the sturdy bones of the Kickstarter drive, the answer will present itself to us. We shall let the fans, the fundraisers, decide. But why just have one? There is such potential in this team for Beards. Clearly, our scheme shall be additive in nature, and not only that, it shall display the diversity of human facial styles. What do I mean? Consider this proposal: $1.6 million: At the reaching of this goal, Josh "JE" Sawyer will adopt an official Production Beard in the traditional "bushy" style. All other hair choices are his to make, except this one. $1.8 million: Adam Brenneke adopts the dynamic and beguiling "soul patch". $2.0 million: Chris Avellone adopts the dashing "musketeer". $2.2 million: Tim Cain, who has traditionally worn a beard, shall remain clean-shaven for the entirety of the project. $2.4 million: Feargus Urquhart will do the unthinkable and attempt what no one has ever attempted - the mythical "John Waters". Won't you join me in imploring our noble beneficiaries to do what is right and necessary for their project and for us, the consumer? Join with me, and we will make a bunch of men look very strange, for an indeterminate period of time. Edited September 18, 2012 by Pop 29 Quote Join me, and we shall make Production Beards a reality! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
evdk Posted September 18, 2012 Share Posted September 18, 2012 But I do not want Tim to shave 1 Quote Say no to popamole! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pop Posted September 18, 2012 Author Share Posted September 18, 2012 It is a necessary sacrifice, I can assure you. Quote Join me, and we shall make Production Beards a reality! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dlux Posted September 18, 2012 Share Posted September 18, 2012 It's a neat idea, but I seriously doubt that this will raise pledges substantially. I would be more afraid that the team would be entitled as "dumbasses" for pulling such a pr stunt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LordCrash Posted September 18, 2012 Share Posted September 18, 2012 (edited) Sign the idea. Edited September 18, 2012 by LordCrash Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MinotaurWarrior Posted September 18, 2012 Share Posted September 18, 2012 Love it. Alpha Protocol may be tied for my favorite Obsidian game, and that beard is tied for my favorite beard of all time. I'd like to see a return to that magic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pop Posted September 18, 2012 Author Share Posted September 18, 2012 With the fulfillment of the $1.6 million goal, we should find someone to hold onto Josh's shaving equipment for him. He won't be needing it for awhile. 1 Quote Join me, and we shall make Production Beards a reality! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starwars Posted September 18, 2012 Share Posted September 18, 2012 They could also bring in Matt McLean and his beard in a sort of mascot role. But yeah... Feargus in that moustache would blow my mind. Quote Listen to my home-made recordings (some original songs, some not): http://www.youtube.c...low=grid&view=0 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NateOwns Posted September 18, 2012 Share Posted September 18, 2012 This would be an awesome stretch goal, as a proud beard wearer myself I fully support this! Quote Can't wait for Project Eternity!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
l3loodangel Posted September 19, 2012 Share Posted September 19, 2012 (edited) What about production bathing? One team member should not bathe the entire period the game gets made, so that he would not wash the luck away. This will also guarantee that the project will not get delayed or that it will even be released earlier. Edited September 19, 2012 by l3loodangel Quote https://www.youtube....=1&feature=plcp - SWTOR review Mass effect 3 and Video game art. Escape goat Our beloved Anita Sarkeesian Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tilly Posted September 19, 2012 Share Posted September 19, 2012 Why don't they just have one of the women pledge to grow a production beard? :u We could get updates on that. ... It'd be less scraggly, that's for sure. n_~ 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fooine Posted September 19, 2012 Share Posted September 19, 2012 Let's also add production homelessness to the mix. I mean, since they'll already have beards and stop bathing... 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gazoinks Posted September 19, 2012 Share Posted September 19, 2012 Chris Avellone with the musketeer beard would be the best thing ever. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pop Posted September 19, 2012 Author Share Posted September 19, 2012 I don't know if everyone is understanding the gravity of this mission. Quote Join me, and we shall make Production Beards a reality! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
l3loodangel Posted September 19, 2012 Share Posted September 19, 2012 I don't know if everyone is understanding the gravity of this mission. My vote goes for homelessness, because nothing says that you are devoted to a project when you are eating out of trash can for it! Quote https://www.youtube....=1&feature=plcp - SWTOR review Mass effect 3 and Video game art. Escape goat Our beloved Anita Sarkeesian Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alvin Nelson Posted September 19, 2012 Share Posted September 19, 2012 I'm for this. 5 Quote Let me get back to sleeping. I'm tired... Avatar made by Jorian Drake Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pop Posted September 19, 2012 Author Share Posted September 19, 2012 Go forth and spread the gospel, Alvin Nelson Quote Join me, and we shall make Production Beards a reality! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tale Posted September 19, 2012 Share Posted September 19, 2012 Can we get a stretch goal for Alvin to let his hair grow? 1 Quote "Show me a man who "plays fair" and I'll show you a very talented cheater." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nakia Posted September 19, 2012 Share Posted September 19, 2012 I am in favor of the bearded lady. Quote I have but one enemy: myself - Drow saying Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pop Posted September 19, 2012 Author Share Posted September 19, 2012 Mods please pin this thread to the top of the forum, it's very important Quote Join me, and we shall make Production Beards a reality! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
C2B Posted September 19, 2012 Share Posted September 19, 2012 Alvin speaks all the truths (and so does pop) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex Sherman Posted September 19, 2012 Share Posted September 19, 2012 I assumed that production bears were a given in any professional development house they feed on the weaker developers, leaving the strong to make better games and grow longer beards Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alvin Nelson Posted September 19, 2012 Share Posted September 19, 2012 I would be down for growing my hair out again. I failed on Alpha Protocol (sorry Josh Sawyer) so I would be willing to make it up to him, haha. 6 Quote Let me get back to sleeping. I'm tired... Avatar made by Jorian Drake Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gurkog Posted September 19, 2012 Share Posted September 19, 2012 (edited) Alvin will be our hero. May your beard shed light upon the path to success! Edited September 19, 2012 by Gurkog Quote Grandiose statements, cryptic warnings, blind fanboyisim and an opinion that leaves no room for argument and will never be dissuaded. Welcome to the forums, you'll go far in this place my boy, you'll go far! The people who are a part of the "Fallout Community" have been refined and distilled over time into glittering gems of hatred. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dem Posted September 19, 2012 Share Posted September 19, 2012 Only if those who pledge enough may come visit Obsidian studios to touch the beards. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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