Magister Lajciak Posted December 10, 2008 Share Posted December 10, 2008 Mirror's Edge: http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/vie...57-Mirrors-Edge I found this one to be particularly funny, but it might be just that I have been missing these reviews after taking a few week hiatus. I agree with some of his points, namely when the developers just decided in the game to make you kill every soldier in the area just to keep moving. But the ones about not really explaining things (particularly what you were carrying) I'm annoyed at because he seems to have not watched the cut scenes or taken the game anywhere beyond the first level as the first level is the only one where the message you were carrying was unexplained and the police chase seemed to be for no good reason. After that the cops just chase faith because she is a suspect in a criminal investigation, and most levels she's not even carrying a message. Personally I liked the game, And if EA had some better combat in the thing it might actually be a pretty good contender, but as it is with combat that is harder to play than Contra without codes and a few pants on head retarded puzzle, I think overall it's a pretty average game for most people. His review always mocks the game he is reviewing - that's part of the entertainment value. Oh, and I am not the only person who remembers Contra? I enjoyed that game back in the day! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hurlshort Posted December 10, 2008 Share Posted December 10, 2008 up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, a, b, start! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deraldin Posted December 10, 2008 Share Posted December 10, 2008 up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, a, b, start! You fool! It's not up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, a, b, start! It's up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A! Start isn't part of the code. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pop Posted December 10, 2008 Share Posted December 10, 2008 Left 4 Dead The lead-in's funny, considering L4D's actual origins. Join me, and we shall make Production Beards a reality! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hurlshort Posted December 10, 2008 Share Posted December 10, 2008 up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, a, b, start! You fool! It's not up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, a, b, start! It's up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A! Start isn't part of the code. Dweeb :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deraldin Posted December 10, 2008 Share Posted December 10, 2008 Left 4 Dead The lead-in's funny, considering L4D's actual origins. I laughed. First ZP to get me to do more than smile in quite some time. Loved the hoover sidekick. Dweeb :D I've never actually used the code before, but it's somehow drilled itself into my brain. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meshugger Posted December 10, 2008 Share Posted December 10, 2008 That's actually a pretty good review. While it didn't convince me to buy it, atleast i now understand the positives and negatives in plain 'ole dumbspeak. "Some men see things as they are and say why?""I dream things that never were and say why not?"- George Bernard Shaw"Hope in reality is the worst of all evils because it prolongs the torments of man."- Friedrich Nietzsche "The amount of energy necessary to refute bull**** is an order of magnitude bigger than to produce it." - Some guy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maria Caliban Posted December 10, 2008 Share Posted December 10, 2008 I can tell Yahtzee is not bitter about paying $100 for a video game. I have to say though that if a video game did anything other than grant me enlightenment, or caused multiple orgasm whenever I played it, I'd be bitter about paying $100 for it as well. "When is this out. I can't wait to play it so I can talk at length about how bad it is." - Gorgon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mkreku Posted December 11, 2008 Share Posted December 11, 2008 Just press the left mouse button as fast as possible... nothing that insane about it. That every fight is random win/loss does suck some though . Save lots. Not really. Just spend lots and lots of skill points on boosting your hitpoints. The healing stuff is percentage based so they heal as much whether you have 50 hp or 500 hp. The damage done to you by enemies is always the same though so what kills you in one hit when you have 50 hp takes ten hits when you have 500. And it will still only take one healing potion to get up to full health. Swedes, go to: Spel2, for the latest game reviews in swedish! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Calax Posted December 11, 2008 Share Posted December 11, 2008 I can tell Yahtzee is not bitter about paying $100 for a video game. I have to say though that if a video game did anything other than grant me enlightenment, or caused multiple orgasm whenever I played it, I'd be bitter about paying $100 for it as well. IIRC he gets money from the Escapist for all his games, or he writes em off as a job expense. Victor of the 5 year fan fic competition! Kevin Butler will awesome your face off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maria Caliban Posted December 11, 2008 Share Posted December 11, 2008 I can tell Yahtzee is not bitter about paying $100 for a video game. I have to say though that if a video game did anything other than grant me enlightenment, or caused multiple orgasm whenever I played it, I'd be bitter about paying $100 for it as well. IIRC he gets money from the Escapist for all his games, or he writes em off as a job expense. That's what I'd assume. It would make no sense for a professional reviewer to pay for all of his games, but as often as he brings up the cost of games and complains about having to pay for them, it makes me wonder. "When is this out. I can't wait to play it so I can talk at length about how bad it is." - Gorgon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hell Kitty Posted December 11, 2008 Share Posted December 11, 2008 Games in Australia have been this expensive for a long time (the first game I ever bought with my own money was Donkey Kong on SNES, and it was $80), so it's probably just general bitching about the situation here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mkreku Posted December 11, 2008 Share Posted December 11, 2008 I can tell Yahtzee is not bitter about paying $100 for a video game. I have to say though that if a video game did anything other than grant me enlightenment, or caused multiple orgasm whenever I played it, I'd be bitter about paying $100 for it as well. IIRC he gets money from the Escapist for all his games, or he writes em off as a job expense. That's what I'd assume. It would make no sense for a professional reviewer to pay for all of his games, but as often as he brings up the cost of games and complains about having to pay for them, it makes me wonder. The way it works is that you have to let every known distributor know you exist, promote your site as being bigger than it really is and hope they'll put you on their mail-out list. If they do (and consider you big enough), you'll get sent review copies of the games a few days before release. Sometimes you get them sent late (if some huge magazine/online site wants exclusivity) and sometimes not at all (Rockstars games usually only get sent to the biggest ones). When you don't get them sent home to you, you either pirate them (which is risky because in Sweden they check up on companies and their licenses from time to time) or buy them yourself. Swedes, go to: Spel2, for the latest game reviews in swedish! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maria Caliban Posted December 11, 2008 Share Posted December 11, 2008 The way it works is that you have to let every known distributor know you exist, promote your site as being bigger than it really is and hope they'll put you on their mail-out list. If they do (and consider you big enough), you'll get sent review copies of the games a few days before release. Sometimes you get them sent late (if some huge magazine/online site wants exclusivity) and sometimes not at all (Rockstars games usually only get sent to the biggest ones). When you don't get them sent home to you, you either pirate them (which is risky because in Sweden they check up on companies and their licenses from time to time) or buy them yourself. That "When is this out. I can't wait to play it so I can talk at length about how bad it is." - Gorgon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pop Posted December 11, 2008 Share Posted December 11, 2008 (edited) I don't think online review sites, even relatively well-regarded ones like the Escapist, have that kind of money. They likely provide the systems necessary to play the games (Yahtzee played Crysis on a high-end rig provided by the Escapist, for example) but covering the cost of games might be too much. Maybe they go halfsies? Maybe we can get Matt Rorie in here to tell us how many free samples Obsidz gives out to reviewers, and which ones get them in particular. Edited December 11, 2008 by Pop Join me, and we shall make Production Beards a reality! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maria Caliban Posted December 11, 2008 Share Posted December 11, 2008 I don't think online review sites, even relatively well-regarded ones like the Escapist, have that kind of money. They likely provide the systems necessary to play the games (Yahtzee played Crysis on a high-end rig provided by the Escapist, for example) but covering the cost of games might be too much. Maybe they go halfsies? Maybe we can get Matt Rorie in here to tell us how many free samples Obsidz gives out to reviewers, and which ones get them in particular. True. They may just pay him and he gets to write off the cost of games as a business expense. "When is this out. I can't wait to play it so I can talk at length about how bad it is." - Gorgon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Calax Posted December 11, 2008 Share Posted December 11, 2008 I can tell Yahtzee is not bitter about paying $100 for a video game. I have to say though that if a video game did anything other than grant me enlightenment, or caused multiple orgasm whenever I played it, I'd be bitter about paying $100 for it as well. IIRC he gets money from the Escapist for all his games, or he writes em off as a job expense. That's what I'd assume. It would make no sense for a professional reviewer to pay for all of his games, but as often as he brings up the cost of games and complains about having to pay for them, it makes me wonder. The way it works is that you have to let every known distributor know you exist, promote your site as being bigger than it really is and hope they'll put you on their mail-out list. If they do (and consider you big enough), you'll get sent review copies of the games a few days before release. Sometimes you get them sent late (if some huge magazine/online site wants exclusivity) and sometimes not at all (Rockstars games usually only get sent to the biggest ones). When you don't get them sent home to you, you either pirate them (which is risky because in Sweden they check up on companies and their licenses from time to time) or buy them yourself. really early in the halo review he mentions that the escapist is buying all his games for him http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/vie...uation/8-Halo-3 Victor of the 5 year fan fic competition! Kevin Butler will awesome your face off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deraldin Posted December 17, 2008 Share Posted December 17, 2008 Sonic Unleashed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Killian Kalthorne Posted December 17, 2008 Share Posted December 17, 2008 http://www.gamedamage.net/ "Your Job is not to die for your country, but set a man on fire, and take great comfort in the general hostility and unfairness of the universe." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Purkake Posted December 17, 2008 Share Posted December 17, 2008 http://www.gamedamage.net/ Yeah, I think I'll stay as far away from that as possible and enjoy Zero Punctuation. Seriously, who the hell are those 2 weird guys? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gorth Posted December 17, 2008 Share Posted December 17, 2008 Sonic Unleashed "He doesn't need another game, he needs help" Edit: Disclaimer - I've never played any Sonic games. “He who joyfully marches to music in rank and file has already earned my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, since for him the spinal cord would surely suffice.” - Albert Einstein Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WILL THE ALMIGHTY Posted December 17, 2008 Share Posted December 17, 2008 http://www.gamedamage.net/ Yeah, I think I'll stay as far away from that as possible and enjoy Zero Punctuation. Seriously, who the hell are those 2 weird guys? Yug and Matt from AustralianGamer.com. Yahtzee occasionally does podcasts with them, and they're pretty interesting to listen to. I'd prefer if we didn't have to see their faces though the show is pretty decent. "Alright, I've been thinking. When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade - make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons, what am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager. Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons. Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons. I'm going to to get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Purkake Posted December 18, 2008 Share Posted December 18, 2008 http://www.gamedamage.net/ Yeah, I think I'll stay as far away from that as possible and enjoy Zero Punctuation. Seriously, who the hell are those 2 weird guys? Yug and Matt from AustralianGamer.com. Yahtzee occasionally does podcasts with them, and they're pretty interesting to listen to. I'd prefer if we didn't have to see their faces though the show is pretty decent. Yeah seeing Yahtzee look at you with his cold stare does not make for good TV. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GreasyDogMeat Posted December 18, 2008 Share Posted December 18, 2008 Sonic Unleashed "He doesn't need another game, he needs help" Edit: Disclaimer - I've never played any Sonic games. Never played any of the newer '3d' versions, but the original Sega Genesis Trilogy was amazing and made that fat plumber Mario look like... well... a fat plumber. Being able to combine the Sonic 3 cartridge with the Sonic & Knuckles cartridge was especially awesome and created a mega game. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meshugger Posted December 18, 2008 Share Posted December 18, 2008 Sonic Unleashed Oh dear, how the mighty Sonic have fallen. "Some men see things as they are and say why?""I dream things that never were and say why not?"- George Bernard Shaw"Hope in reality is the worst of all evils because it prolongs the torments of man."- Friedrich Nietzsche "The amount of energy necessary to refute bull**** is an order of magnitude bigger than to produce it." - Some guy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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