I couldn't disagree more. Thematically, the game is very deep. KOTOR:1 had a nice twist, but lacked any depth. Malak was a cardboard cutout villian, and never once in the game did I feel like I was playing anything other than a black-and-white simplistic story.
KOTOR:2 really digs deep down and explores the roots of whether or not violence is ever justified. Were the Jedi right to avoid getting involved in the Mandalorian Wars? Was the Exile right for disobeying them? Is it possible to fight for what is right and not be affected by the ammount of violence, death and suffering surrounding you?
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I could not agree more. KOTOR was relatively placid; BioWare crafted a very popular twist yet never fully developed on it. I always hoped that once the PC discovered his identity there would be some sort of self-confrontation, a shred of remorse perhaps, the absolute need for redemption. Revan is effectively a war criminal; he's responsible for the deaths of millions, yet despite the potential for characterization it's never really dissected. Its largely ignored in fact, save for the odd sentence here or there.
So it was left for Obsidian to flesh out the conflict, to depict just how detrimental the consequences were, and in the exile we have a PC who is constantly in conflict with his past, who has been evading his actions for almost a decade, till he is forced into confrontation. Some of the highlights of TSL for me were the discussions between Bao-dur and the exile, their experiences, those feelings that they could never express, not to anyone who was hadn't experienced the horrors they had first hand.
They handled this material quite sensitively too. Not to have this descend into some Revan verses Exile debate but there's one dialogue selection that never fails to get me. Your first level up, Kreia reveals to the exile that he can feel the force, to which he can respond something to the tune of "Not again. Never again!" and in those few words the exile becomes more sympathetic a character than Revan ever was.
Obsidian really grit their collective teeth and went all out and yes, TSL wasn't a unanimous success thanks to time constraints (which I think is responsible for much of the contempt) but I think they crafted a very brave game that chose to question instead of simply handing out recycled conventions.