This new iteration in the Resident Evil follows in the second movie's steps by managing to be worse than the previous one. The second movie managed to be worse than the first, while I enjoyed the first, and this one manages to be worse than the second. The second movie had redeeming qualities in that the action scenes were relatively exciting, this one fails to even hit that mark. Resident Evil: Extinction does not know what kind of movie it wants to be. It doesn't know if it wants to be a B-grade zombie flick, a monster movie, an action movie, or some sort of post apocalyptic Mad Max type adventure. It's not that it tries to do all of these things. That would be giving it too much credit. It's just too stupid to even know what it's doing at all. At one point in a the film a large flock of birds start attacking the characters in a scene that may give you some feeling of nostalgia for Hitch****. This is quickly ruined when one character heroicly runs out firing dual pistols akimbo style at them. I think he wanted to marry Hitch**** to John Woo here but it only comes across that way if you consider the possibility that Hitch**** and Woo are brother and sister and this is their retarded offspring. I didn't know whether to be scared or excited, but I did know that I wanted to leave.
The plot is held together by poorly placed and poorly paced scenes that feature not just one, but two, brooding heroines who complain that everyone just seems to die around them. The fact that one of these two heroines is Milla Jovovich is the only thing that stopped me from walking out, something I have not considered doing before aside from Dude, Where's My Car?. She's more beautiful in this movie than she has been since she was naked and couldn't speak english in The Fifth Element. Every time she showed up on screen it was enough to keep me staying. Mainly because it gave me nice source material to fantasize that I was making out with her, which made it well worth the price of admission.
5 stars for Milla "Om nom nom" Jovovich
-3 stars for being an utterly horrible piece of cinema, second in ****tiness only to Mortal Kombat Annihilation
2 stars final score