You're not.
I'd like the jedi code to finally mean something, though. The jedi code dictates no relationships, yet we have them in each and every game. And although we could argue that TSL doesn't to some extent, since they never lead to anything and Kreia tells us in the end that we must leave such things behind, it still doesn't make it a choice.
I like it if you KotOR3 could give you the option not to seek romance and have that have plot impact. Because so far it hasn't.
Every time somebody makes that point, people moan with "oh, but you don't have to pursue the romance options in the KotOR games - it's your choice". Yes, it is, but it's a choice between whether I want to play that part of the game or not, and if I choose not to, my only reward is that there are parts of the game I don't get to see - players who defy the jedi code and choose romance face no detrimental effects as a consequence of that choice, which begs the question of why the code dictates this in the first place. When are we finally going to see why this is in the jedi code? I can see the potential problems for it, but as much as the jedi preaches having no relationships, the plots always, always prove the opposite - in K1 romancing Bastila makes it easier to turn her back to the light side in the end, and in TSL Atris falls to the dark side not because she loves the exile but because she denies those feelings for him. Let's see the other side of that, for crying out loud! Because the jedi are correct that romance can lead to disaster. The Star Wars plots just never support that position...
In other words, you want the romance to be just little more than a gratuitous feature just to satisfy Big Al and the boys? (Free cookie to who gets that reference)
I'm one who enjoys a well-written romance. IIRC Romance novels do very well.
And yeah, pursuing a romance option allows you to see parts of the game that you otherwise wouldn't see.
What might help would be if the PC and RO weren't Jedi.