Time for a paradigm shift!

[Meshugger]

I am playing Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon at the moment. While it is one of the better FPS's in a loooong time, it sheer carnage got me thinking: What if games like these were about humping, making babies, you name it. I am not thinking of those Hentai-games or silly mods for Skyrim. I am thinking about the Call of Duty: Modern Kama Sutra or The Elder Scrolls: Orgasmorock. I am talking about Bioshock: Infinite numbers in terms of budget and production values.

 

What i am calling for is some wealthy billionare to buy Bethesda, Activision, EA, Sony or Microsoft (Nintendo are cool, let them be) and simply do the best practical joke in a long while: have the studios to make games where the sweaty, sensual love is the gameplay. Instead of killing 700 guys, you bone them in hilarious ways. Your weapon arsenal is the basic genitalia, pleasure condoms that are upgradeable, oils, toys and whatnot. The final boss requires excellent thrust-techniques and can only be only defeated with the best equipment.

 

Same with RPG's. Dungeon crawlers get a whole new meaning, arch-nemesis in the tower can only be broken by a high-level seducation spell by the wizard, barbarian tanks pummel through thrash mobs of skeletons with his virility, all while the rogue sneak up from behind, just as the villain likes it. Attributes get a whole new practical meaning, and the stories to be told, ah the stories. Think "What can change the nature of love?".

 

What would the industry think? What would parents say to their children? Would the console market fall flat on itself, would Steam implode? 

 

What do you think?

[rjshae]

I think it would get boring very quickly.

[Keyrock]

 

Edited July 9, 2013 by Keyrock

[Labadal]

Came in here expecting Final Fantasy XIII talk. I'm pleased to see it was not the case.

[Gorth]

Aren't there games like Dead or Alive or Sexy Beach or whatever they are called around for that purpose?

[Maria Caliban]

I would buy it.

[BruceVC]

I am playing Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon at the moment. While it is one of the better FPS's in a loooong time, it sheer carnage got me thinking: What if games like these were about humping, making babies, you name it. I am not thinking of those Hentai-games or silly mods for Skyrim. I am thinking about the Call of Duty: Modern Kama Sutra or The Elder Scrolls: Orgasmorock. I am talking about Bioshock: Infinite numbers in terms of budget and production values.

 

What i am calling for is some wealthy billionare to buy Bethesda, Activision, EA, Sony or Microsoft (Nintendo are cool, let them be) and simply do the best practical joke in a long while: have the studios to make games where the sweaty, sensual love is the gameplay. Instead of killing 700 guys, you bone them in hilarious ways. Your weapon arsenal is the basic genitalia, pleasure condoms that are upgradeable, oils, toys and whatnot. The final boss requires excellent thrust-techniques and can only be only defeated with the best equipment.

 

Same with RPG's. Dungeon crawlers get a whole new meaning, arch-nemesis in the tower can only be broken by a high-level seducation spell by the wizard, barbarian tanks pummel through thrash mobs of skeletons with his virility, all while the rogue sneak up from behind, just as the villain likes it. Attributes get a whole new practical meaning, and the stories to be told, ah the stories. Think "What can change the nature of love?".

 

What would the industry think? What would parents say to their children? Would the console market fall flat on itself, would Steam implode? 

 

What do you think?

 

You are obviously joking and even if you aren't its a funny post. But no I wouldn't buy a game like that as it would get very boring. I can stream porn if I want to watch something similar to what you are suggesting but not in a game.

[PK htiw klaw eriF]

[Meshugger]

Don't you guys see?

 

You find the act to kill more interesting than the act of love. Instead of the arrow of Eros, you deliberately choose the arrow of death. Because of what, being afraid to be bored? Or...hold on. Is it something else perhaps? Maybe fear? Fears that better not to be told?

 

It is time Mr. Buffet and Mr. Soros, please cleanse the industry from the eyes of fear that wants us put locks on our doors, buy more guns and worry about our bank accounts. The time is now nigh to step forward and choose love, because the masses fears it, rejects it and have grown to be dependent on it.

[BruceVC]

Don't you guys see?

 

You find the act to kill more interesting than the act of love. Instead of the arrow of Eros, you deliberately choose the arrow of death. Because of what, being afraid to be bored? Or...hold on. Is it something else perhaps? Maybe fear? Fears that better not to be told?

 

It is time Mr. Buffet and Mr. Soros, please cleanse the industry from the eyes of fear that wants us put locks on our doors, buy more guns and worry about our bank accounts. The time is now nigh to step forward and choose love, because the masses fears it, rejects it and have grown to be dependent on it.

 

Actually you make a good point despite the fact you are joking, what does it say about the state of our  consciousness and society in general where we prefer to play a game that we get to kill people instead of a game where we get to explore the bountiful excitement of things like love and having picnics with friends? You have asked some salient questions that I think we all need to reflect on

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited July 10, 2013 by BruceVC

[HoonDing]

Expect something like this from CD Projekt.

[Orogun01]

 

Don't you guys see?

 

You find the act to kill more interesting than the act of love. Instead of the arrow of Eros, you deliberately choose the arrow of death. Because of what, being afraid to be bored? Or...hold on. Is it something else perhaps? Maybe fear? Fears that better not to be told?

 

It is time Mr. Buffet and Mr. Soros, please cleanse the industry from the eyes of fear that wants us put locks on our doors, buy more guns and worry about our bank accounts. The time is now nigh to step forward and choose love, because the masses fears it, rejects it and have grown to be dependent on it.

 

Actually you make a good point despite the fact you are joking, what does it say about the state of our  consciousness and society in general where we prefer to play a game that we get to kill people instead of a game where we get to explore the bountiful excitement of things like love and having picnics with friends? You have asked some salient questions that I think we all need to reflect on

 

 

It means Dating Sims are for those guys who bring their pillow-waifu to public places. 

I have to vicariously kill dragons because all the real ones died years ago (plus the price tag on a dragon safari is beyond my means) why would I want to have a vicariously experience when I can have the real thing? Now a game where you kill your nagging significant other; that I can get behind.

[Walsingham]

Erm... it's a funny idea so don't take this the wrong way....

 

But...

 

If you combine the logical problem space of a tactical shooter and smush it into sex then... you just have a kind of angry monkey rape simulator.

 

It would probably go down very well with highly sexually competitive species like ducks, but other than that.

 

[Malcador]

Given the way the industry is going, I'm sure someone will make it happen. And hate is a lot better than love, keeps you on the attack.

[Labadal]

Don't you guys see?

 

You find the act to kill more interesting than the act of love. Instead of the arrow of Eros, you deliberately choose the arrow of death. Because of what, being afraid to be bored? Or...hold on. Is it something else perhaps? Maybe fear? Fears that better not to be told?

 

It is time Mr. Buffet and Mr. Soros, please cleanse the industry from the eyes of fear that wants us put locks on our doors, buy more guns and worry about our bank accounts. The time is now nigh to step forward and choose love, because the masses fears it, rejects it and have grown to be dependent on it.

I'm only interested if the game is as challenging as Demon's/Dark Souls. Call it Boned Souls.

[TrashMan]

 

Actually you make a good point despite the fact you are joking, what does it say about the state of our  consciousness and society in general where we prefer to play a game that we get to kill people instead of a game where we get to explore the bountiful excitement of things like love and having picnics with friends? You have asked some salient questions that I think we all need to reflect on

 

If I'd have to guess, it's probably because I can have a picnic with friends in RL, but I can't really kill people.

Well....I can.

But the last time I tried there were practical complications. Just cleaning the blood alone is tedious and tme-consuming.

Edited July 10, 2013 by TrashMan

[kirottu]

Walsingham ruined ducks for me... and this thread. 

[Orogun01]

 

 

Actually you make a good point despite the fact you are joking, what does it say about the state of our  consciousness and society in general where we prefer to play a game that we get to kill people instead of a game where we get to explore the bountiful excitement of things like love and having picnics with friends? You have asked some salient questions that I think we all need to reflect on

 

If I'd have to guess, it's probably because I can have a picnic with friends in RL, but  I can' really kill people.

Well....I can. But it is..complicated.

 

I don't know what reality you live in but you can do those thing in this one, at the same time even.

[BruceVC]

 

 

Actually you make a good point despite the fact you are joking, what does it say about the state of our  consciousness and society in general where we prefer to play a game that we get to kill people instead of a game where we get to explore the bountiful excitement of things like love and having picnics with friends? You have asked some salient questions that I think we all need to reflect on

 

If I'd have to guess, it's probably because I can have a picnic with friends in RL, but I can't really kill people.

Well....I can.

But the last time I tried there were practical complications.

 

 

But Trashman how do we know that a game where we can have a picnic in different outdoor environments wouldn't be fun. There could be exciting things that happen like maybe ants attack the picnic basket or it starts raining? Can you honestly say that you wouldn't be even a little interested in a game like that

[Meshugger]

 

 

Don't you guys see?

 

You find the act to kill more interesting than the act of love. Instead of the arrow of Eros, you deliberately choose the arrow of death. Because of what, being afraid to be bored? Or...hold on. Is it something else perhaps? Maybe fear? Fears that better not to be told?

 

It is time Mr. Buffet and Mr. Soros, please cleanse the industry from the eyes of fear that wants us put locks on our doors, buy more guns and worry about our bank accounts. The time is now nigh to step forward and choose love, because the masses fears it, rejects it and have grown to be dependent on it.

 

Actually you make a good point despite the fact you are joking, what does it say about the state of our  consciousness and society in general where we prefer to play a game that we get to kill people instead of a game where we get to explore the bountiful excitement of things like love and having picnics with friends? You have asked some salient questions that I think we all need to reflect on

 

 

It means Dating Sims are for those guys who bring their pillow-waifu to public places. 

I have to vicariously kill dragons because all the real ones died years ago (plus the price tag on a dragon safari is beyond my means) why would I want to have a vicariously experience when I can have the real thing? Now a game where you kill your nagging significant other; that I can get behind.

 

 

Creating death is as important as creating life. One can not exist without the other. However, the scale has been tilted for far too long in favor for ending life. Now is the time for balance.

 

Dating sims do not work since they do not stimulate the though-guy dude-bro-instinct. Gears of Boners on the other hand will.

Edited July 10, 2013 by Meshugger

[Malcador]

So Meshugger = Molyneux ?

[Meshugger]

No, i am the messanger. Just planting some seeds, hoping that they will bear fruit someday.

[Humanoid]

An Oglaf game would be this exactly - heck the exact system proposed is shown in the strip from a couple weeks ago (Gifted 2). And I'd totally buy it. Totally, utterly, passionately, buy it.

Edited July 10, 2013 by Humanoid

[Keyrock]

Hmm, I'm not sure explicit sex would go over well with the FCC.  What about a bromance RPG?  You have different abilities like man hug, chest bump, high five, fist bump, and so on.  As you level up you could upgrade your abilities to man hug with back pat, predator handshake, fist bump explosion.  Here's an example of BioWare style dialogue options:

 

Bro, you want head down to the beach and chill?  

 

Fo sho, that's a great idea, brah.  I'll grab some brewskis.

 

I gotta pick up the laundry first.

 

Nah brah, that sounds lame.

[Morgoth]

@OP

 

Horrible idea. Go home.