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Question for the regulars here


Cantousent

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I know it's pathetic to ask this here. Aw well, here goes:

 

I'm estranged from my family. I've refused to talk to them for years. I have one cousin who sends me information about what's happening in texts to which I don't respond.

 

My dad has been sick for years. Now, I don't care about most of my family, but I love my dad and miss him. He's been in hospice for a couple of months and now they've taken him off of all his medicine this morning and put him on a morphine drip. They anticipate he'll die within the next several hours to maybe a week as of the time I received the texts a few hours ago. How silly and frivolous would it be to make my Project Eternity pledge in his name and have his information used for everything associated with the pledge tier? I don't know. I feel stupid even asking, but you guys are gamers and some of you have been coming here for years.

Fionavar's Holliday Wishes to all members of our online community:  Happy Holidays

 

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Remembering tarna, Phosphor, Metadigital, and Visceris.  Drink mead heartily in the halls of Valhalla, my friends!

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I'm not socialized well enough to really understand the point of memorialization. But I suspect they're often as much about comforting those who grieve as they are in honoring the mentioned. If it helps you, I do not see it as a bad idea.

"Show me a man who "plays fair" and I'll show you a very talented cheater."
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If it's important/comforting to you and one of your ways of honoring/remembering a loved one, that's what matters. There's nothing frivolous, pathetic, or silly about wanting to do that.

 

I'm sorry to hear about your father, Cant. Hugs.

“Things are as they are. Looking out into the universe at night, we make no comparisons between right and wrong stars, nor between well and badly arranged constellations.” – Alan Watts
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I wish I could offer advice, but I am also very recently estranged from my family. I really have no idea what I will do when faced with their health issues.

 

As for making the pledge, I don't want to come across as harsh Cant, but I do feel like this is something for you and not for your father. It will make you feel better. I would say this even if your were making a contribution to charity in his name. It may help your conscience, but how will it make him feel? Will he understand it? I don't know enough about your relationship to answer that, of course.

 

I've been praying for guidance with my own estrangement, I'll add you to my prayers :)

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Think I'll pick up my phone now ... Light & Prayer as you navigate this Cantousent!

Many thanks. Always hard to express the complexity of our relationships with our families, isn't it? Always good to hear from a friend.
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Fionavar's Holliday Wishes to all members of our online community:  Happy Holidays

 

Join the revelry at the Obsidian Plays channel:
Obsidian Plays


 
Remembering tarna, Phosphor, Metadigital, and Visceris.  Drink mead heartily in the halls of Valhalla, my friends!

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Put up camp beside his bed and stay put until time us up. Blame Einstein and his stupid law of relativity, but that law is one of those things still needing to be bent a bit. Time lost doesn't come back. If you care about somebody, living or late, pay tribute any way you can :thumbsup:

“He who joyfully marches to music in rank and file has already earned my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, since for him the spinal cord would surely suffice.” - Albert Einstein
 

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Best of luck dealing with this.

Why has elegance found so little following? Elegance has the disadvantage that hard work is needed to achieve it and a good education to appreciate it. - Edsger Wybe Dijkstra

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It's no biggie, Mal. We get older and eventually die. That's how the universe works. I appreciate everyone's answers. As it turns out, he stopped breathing about an hour ago and the hospice workers arrive and verified that he's dead just a few minutes ago according to the texts. There wouldn't have been time to drive there before it happened anyway by the time I could have left. Mods, feel free to close this thread.

Fionavar's Holliday Wishes to all members of our online community:  Happy Holidays

 

Join the revelry at the Obsidian Plays channel:
Obsidian Plays


 
Remembering tarna, Phosphor, Metadigital, and Visceris.  Drink mead heartily in the halls of Valhalla, my friends!

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Nothing really to offer but condolences and hopes that he led a good life :luck:

 

Just pm somebody if you change your mind about locking it.

“He who joyfully marches to music in rank and file has already earned my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, since for him the spinal cord would surely suffice.” - Albert Einstein
 

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