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Zero Punctuation - Yahtzee reviews


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http://www.escapistmagazine.com/articles/v...ssassin-s-Creed

 

 

Assassin's Creed.

 

In other news, Yahtzee is still awesome.

"My hovercraft is full of eels!" - Hungarian tourist
I am Dan Quayle of the Romans.
I want to tattoo a map of the Netherlands on my nether lands.
Heja Sverige!!
Everyone should cuffawkle more.
The wrench is your friend. :bat:

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Ahahahaha, AWESOME :p

 

edit: I missed MOH Airborne review when it came out. I love the part where he analyzes why americans have fixation with WW2 :lol:

Edited by Xard

How can it be a no ob build. It has PROVEN effective. I dare you to show your builds and I will tear you apart in an arugment about how these builds will won them.

- OverPowered Godzilla (OPG)

 

 

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Well that was a nice review. He seems a lot more angered than in the FEAR review too.

"Alright, I've been thinking. When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade - make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons, what am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager. Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons. Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons. I'm going to to get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!"

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He pretty much nailed it. I actually have 3 real guitars at home that i play on a regular basis. But the later batch of songs in GHIII, such as "Raining Blood" by Slayer are even more difficult in the game at hard mode than playing them with a REAL guitar.

"Some men see things as they are and say why?"
"I dream things that never were and say why not?"
- George Bernard Shaw

"Hope in reality is the worst of all evils because it prolongs the torments of man."
- Friedrich Nietzsche

 

"The amount of energy necessary to refute bull**** is an order of magnitude bigger than to produce it."

- Some guy 

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http://www.escapistmagazine.com/articles/v...ion-Mass-Effect

 

Mass Effect

 

Without sound I can still gather that he thinks it has too many words and relies too much on boobs. He also feels alone in not being absolutely enamored with it.

Edited by Tale
"Show me a man who "plays fair" and I'll show you a very talented cheater."
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OH GAWD MASS EFFECT

 

Watching now

 

edit: Meh, wasn't that great review, my least favourite so far.

 

Although part about Ashley William: lol'd :lol:

Edited by Xard

How can it be a no ob build. It has PROVEN effective. I dare you to show your builds and I will tear you apart in an arugment about how these builds will won them.

- OverPowered Godzilla (OPG)

 

 

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http://www.escapistmagazine.com/articles/v...ion-Mass-Effect

 

Mass Effect

 

Without sound I can still gather that he thinks it has too many words and relies too much on boobs. He also feels alone in not being absolutely enamored with it.

Not quite: Play it if you like KOTOR and RPGs because it won't be an epiphany if you dislike them.

 

Edit: He does mention that the boobs were probably Biowares best idea :lol:

Edited by Moatilliatta
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http://www.escapistmagazine.com/articles/v...ion-Mass-Effect

 

Mass Effect

 

Without sound I can still gather that he thinks it has too many words and relies too much on boobs. He also feels alone in not being absolutely enamored with it.

Not quite: Play it if you like KOTOR and RPGs because it won't be an epiphany if you dislike them.

 

Edit: He does mention that the boobs were probably Biowares best idea :lol:

Ahh, so too many words but he's glad for the boobs!

"Show me a man who "plays fair" and I'll show you a very talented cheater."
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I like how he started the review with A Little Less Conversation.

"My hovercraft is full of eels!" - Hungarian tourist
I am Dan Quayle of the Romans.
I want to tattoo a map of the Netherlands on my nether lands.
Heja Sverige!!
Everyone should cuffawkle more.
The wrench is your friend. :bat:

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The point about too many characters you meet being eager to tell you their life story is valid for many games - I don't know about Mass Effect as I haven't played it, but it's an issue with the genre as a whole. On the other hand, he mostly criticised the quantity of dialogue but not so much the quality. :lol:

"An electric puddle is not what I need right now." (Nina Kalenkov)

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You could say it that way, but then you miss his point of it probably being a good game for people who like KOTOR.

I never said that I figured out what it was all about, just some of it.

"Show me a man who "plays fair" and I'll show you a very talented cheater."
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If it is overly verbose then the quantity tells a lot about the quality, but I would expect Bioware to have at least decent quality of writing.

 

I never said that I figured out what it was all about, just some of it.

And I was just clarifying what it was actually about.

 

I'm not sure where you are going with this. :lol:

Edited by Moatilliatta
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If it is overly verbose then the quantity tells a lot about the quality, but I would expect Bioware to have at least decent quality of writing.

 

 

Did they hire new writers for Mass Effect, or something?

"My hovercraft is full of eels!" - Hungarian tourist
I am Dan Quayle of the Romans.
I want to tattoo a map of the Netherlands on my nether lands.
Heja Sverige!!
Everyone should cuffawkle more.
The wrench is your friend. :bat:

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If it is overly verbose then the quantity tells a lot about the quality, but I would expect Bioware to have at least decent quality of writing.

 

 

Did they hire new writers for Mass Effect, or something?

No idea. My point was that unless Bioware have degraded then I would expect the same standard of decent but not great quality of writing. Are you trying to tell me that you dislike Bioware's writing?

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I think that the quality fluctuates wildly, and it never ever goes above decent. Decent as in adequate.

 

 

Someone kill Bastila now. Please.

"My hovercraft is full of eels!" - Hungarian tourist
I am Dan Quayle of the Romans.
I want to tattoo a map of the Netherlands on my nether lands.
Heja Sverige!!
Everyone should cuffawkle more.
The wrench is your friend. :bat:

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Share on other sites

Eh, her dialogue is not that bad

 

Lead writer is same as for Kotor.

 

I don't know, some of his stuff good and some completely horrible.

 

I mean, Malak's laughter and dialogue, what was he thinking?

How can it be a no ob build. It has PROVEN effective. I dare you to show your builds and I will tear you apart in an arugment about how these builds will won them.

- OverPowered Godzilla (OPG)

 

 

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Compare it to characters written by David Gaider (best example: Jolee Bindo) and especially K2 cast by Chris Avellone

How can it be a no ob build. It has PROVEN effective. I dare you to show your builds and I will tear you apart in an arugment about how these builds will won them.

- OverPowered Godzilla (OPG)

 

 

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Strange, he didn't comment on the story or quality of the dialogue. But judging from how he played it, it seems like he was pretty indifferent to it.

"Some men see things as they are and say why?"
"I dream things that never were and say why not?"
- George Bernard Shaw

"Hope in reality is the worst of all evils because it prolongs the torments of man."
- Friedrich Nietzsche

 

"The amount of energy necessary to refute bull**** is an order of magnitude bigger than to produce it."

- Some guy 

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Compare it to characters written by David Gaider (best example: Jolee Bindo) and especially K2 cast by Chris Avellone

 

That guy (Drew Karpyshyn) is a complete hack. Yuck! It seems that every individual moments of brilliance in writing in Bioware games were written by David Gaider. Which makes me wonder why he hasn't been a lead writer yet? Is he the lead writer on Dragon Age? Does anyone know that? Hopefully they keep Drew away from it.

 

Edit: Okay, I assume that not all ****ty things were made by Drew - Jade Empire had other lead writers. But it makes me wonder that how to you tell these guys apart if they all produce similar stuff?

Edited by Winterwolf

Enough with the dancing clown.

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