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A Funny Stuff Thread

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A bull was walking in his pasture one day and found a turkey trying to flap his wings and fly into the branches of a tree.

"What are you doing?" the bull asked.

"I want to perch in the top of that tree but I can't fly that high." The turkey replied. 

The bull thought for a moment and said "My dung is packed with nutrients you should try eating some" 

As the bull went on his way the turkey decided to give it a try. He found a huge fresh pile of bull droppings and started to peck away. After a week of this the turkey easily flew to the top of the tree and perched proudly there.

And was then shot dead by a hunter.

 

The moral of this story is  "Bulls--t might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there!"

Edited by Guard Dog
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"I care nothing for a man's religion whose dog and cat are not the better for it"

Abraham Lincoln

 

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68754104_2368128463273899_21323917943468

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"I care nothing for a man's religion whose dog and cat are not the better for it"

Abraham Lincoln

 

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The words freedom and liberty, are diminishing the true meaning of the abstract concept they try to explain. The true nature of freedom is such, that the human mind is unable to comprehend it, so we make a cage and name it freedom in order to give a tangible meaning to what we dont understand, just as our ancestors made gods like Thor or Zeus to explain thunder.

 

-Teknoman2-

What? You thought it was a quote from some well known wise guy from the past?

 

Stupidity leads to willful ignorance - willful ignorance leads to hope - hope leads to sex - and that is how a new generation of fools is born!


We are hardcore role players... When we go to bed with a girl, we roll a D20 to see if we hit the target and a D6 to see how much penetration damage we did.

 

Modern democracy is: the sheep voting for which dog will be the shepherd's right hand.

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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69467777_427054821502323_544058947791749

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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Did you guys hear the one about the mathematician who was afraid of negative numbers? He would stop at nothing to avoid them!

 

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"I care nothing for a man's religion whose dog and cat are not the better for it"

Abraham Lincoln

 

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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69473518_10106904769423689_6295116029395

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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11951887_10207404164723528_7411959010274

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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70883469_2425842550835823_80218434596461

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"I care nothing for a man's religion whose dog and cat are not the better for it"

Abraham Lincoln

 

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69594460_2418774908209254_67948609735061

 

The woman of my dreams

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"I care nothing for a man's religion whose dog and cat are not the better for it"

Abraham Lincoln

 

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69295209_10158726144659278_1584428231656

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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