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The Funny Things Thread


Gorth

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i like their "that makes sense" face in the last panel.

The words freedom and liberty, are diminishing the true meaning of the abstract concept they try to explain. The true nature of freedom is such, that the human mind is unable to comprehend it, so we make a cage and name it freedom in order to give a tangible meaning to what we dont understand, just as our ancestors made gods like Thor or Zeus to explain thunder.

 

-Teknoman2-

What? You thought it was a quote from some well known wise guy from the past?

 

Stupidity leads to willful ignorance - willful ignorance leads to hope - hope leads to sex - and that is how a new generation of fools is born!


We are hardcore role players... When we go to bed with a girl, we roll a D20 to see if we hit the target and a D6 to see how much penetration damage we did.

 

Modern democracy is: the sheep voting for which dog will be the shepherd's right hand.

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Reminds me of one of those candid camera shows from a time when it was a novelty. It was shortly after that Indiana Jones movie had been released and the rolling boulder scene was known from trailers everywhere (there was no youtube). Somebody had picked a narrow, winding and steep alley to put a very large polystyrene "rock" at the top end and the roll it down the alley. Peoples panic and trying to get out of the way of the tumbling "rock" was something to behold.

 

 

Not really sure where to put this as the context isn't funny, but the incident self I did find so:

 

 

God has a sense of humour?

"US pastor Tony Perkins, who believes natural disasters are sent by God to punish gay people, has fled his flooded home in Louisiana."

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“He who joyfully marches to music in rank and file has already earned my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, since for him the spinal cord would surely suffice.” - Albert Einstein

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14067535_10157984161930377_1580244855407

 

My brother in law used to work as a doorman in various nightclubs back in the nineties, he took great pleasure in spraying any flat surface he could find in the clubs toilets with WD40, and watching the furious customers who'd intended to snort a little Charlie storm out when their powder turned into a brown gooey mess. Apparently its all snorted off of phones nowadays however, which no doubt would irritate the sadistic old beggar no end if he were still working security.

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Quite an experience to live in misery isn't it? That's what it is to be married with children.

I've seen things you people can't even imagine. Pearly Kings glittering on the Elephant and Castle, Morris Men dancing 'til the last light of midsummer. I watched Druid fires burning in the ruins of Stonehenge, and Yorkshiremen gurning for prizes. All these things will be lost in time, like alopecia on a skinhead. Time for tiffin.

 

Tea for the teapot!

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“Homework or meeting?”

“Meeting,” Sophia said, lifting the book and turning it to face her. It was a mass of mathematics.

“Ehhhh!” Faith hissed, throwing up one arm to cover her face and a hand out. “You shall not defeat me, Van Helsing!”

“Back, back!” Sophia said, jabbing the open book at her. “Or I shall explain the math of weight and balance in aircraft operations!”

“The math!” Faith said, picking up her tray. “It burrrns! You are cruel! Evil, vicious, pilots!”

"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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Of coutse, that joke only works if youa re racist and assume that whites are a majority everywhere. Hell, they aren't even the majority in every Amerikan city. LMAO

DWARVES IN PROJECT ETERNITY = VOLOURN HAS PLEDGED $250.

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