The NFL 2013 Thread

[kgambit]

 

Anyone heard anything about Vilma, I believe his dfr tag would allow him to join the squad after the bye week, too.

 

 

Vilma was on short term IR so he can't practice for six weeks and can't play for the first eight.    If that's right, he will miss Buffalo but will be back for the Jets.

[ManifestedISO]

Oh, hell yes I'm getting a Danny Woodhead jersey. Running back, tight end, all-around machine of forward progress. Kick ass!

[Nepenthe]

Oh, hell yes I'm getting a Danny Woodhead jersey. Running back, tight end, all-around machine of forward progress. Kick ass!

+ beavis and butthead would get a chuckle out of it.

Edited October 15, 2013 by Nepenthe

[Keyrock]

Oh, hell yes I'm getting a Danny Woodhead jersey. Running back, tight end, all-around machine of forward progress. Kick ass!

He's not quite Darren Sproles, but he's a reasonable facsimile.

[Guard Dog]

Is anyone else really looking forward to the Broncos - Colts game on Sunday night? The return of Manning to Indy, Manning vs Luck (old lion vs young lion), shutting up Jim Irsay after his rather thoughtless comments this week. Rarely does a game have so much back story.

[Guard Dog]

This is worth a chuckle

 

http://kissingsuzykolber.uproxx.com/2013/10/32-team-logos-fat.html

[Amentep]

This is worth a chuckle

 

http://kissingsuzykolber.uproxx.com/2013/10/32-team-logos-fat.html

It was pretty funny; I liked the same artist's What if All the NFL Logos were British work too.

Edited October 18, 2013 by Amentep

[Keyrock]

 

This is worth a chuckle

 

http://kissingsuzykolber.uproxx.com/2013/10/32-team-logos-fat.html

It was pretty funny; I liked the same artist's What if All the NFL Logos were British work too.

 

The Seahawks one is gold:

 

[ManifestedISO]

Cool! Haha, thanks for a great laugh. Our Dazzling LightyBulbs will hopefully overcome the, er-- Silly P-kitties. Larders for the win! 

[ManifestedISO]

I swear to Fouts it should be illegal for two undefeated teams to be in one division this late in the year. I'm supposed to want the Colts to beat Denver, but I'd rather see Peyton destroy Indy. 

 

  

[Keyrock]

Cowboys won an ugly game filled with penalties and sputtering offenses that could barely sustain a few plays in a row, let alone entire drives.  Some may say "Well it was due to good defense".  No, I have eyeballs, it was sloppy undisciplined play on both sides with the exception of a couple decent drives by Dallas.  Nick Foles is not good.  He looked good last week, but that was against a crap team.  This week, against a slightly less crap team he looked thoroughly incompetent.  Matt Barkley looked even worse, but I suppose I should cut him a bit of slack, being his first NFL action and all.  Anyway, clearly Vick is the choice at starter, which is fine...  when he can stay healthy...  so maybe 3 or 4   more weeks this season total.  Anyway, the Boys are alone in 1st and might just win the division by default.  Too early to tell, though.  There's plenty of derp in the NFC East left this season.

[Leferd]

Denver is now 6-1.

 

Meanwhile, the combined record of the Chiefs' opponents are 14-33.

[Hurlshort]

I read that every team that has started 7-0 has made it to the Superbowl somewhere.  My guess is the Chiefs will break that record.  They are a good team, but I'm not sure I see them beating Denver.

[Keyrock]

Denver is extremely beatable.  They have a superpowered offense, but they also have a Loch Ness defense (just like the Loch Ness Monster, it's only imaginary).  Still, outside of the Colts, who just did it, I'm not sure who in the AFC is going to beat them.  The Pats are very shaky, the Bengals are a Jeckyll & Hyde team, the Chiefs are solid, but I'm not sure they have the firepower to hang enough points on the Broncos, everybody else in the AFC is mediocre or worse.

[kgambit]

OMG, the Giants actually won a game?  How bad does that make the Vikings? 

[Enoch]

I read that every team that has started 7-0 has made it to the Superbowl somewhere.  My guess is the Chiefs will break that record.  They are a good team, but I'm not sure I see them beating Denver.

 

I agree, although I really really want to see the reactions of Eagles fans if Andy Reid wins a championship in his first season with a different team. 

 

OMG, the Giants actually won a game?  How bad does that make the Vikings? 

 

Starting Josh Freeman after a whole week and a half to learn the system was... an interesting decision.  About a third of his throws came in roughly 8 feet over the receivers' heads. 

 

The Giants actually had a pulse last night for 1 offensive drive.  Normal starting Center David Baas was actually playing for their first drive last night, and they marched down the field, had some nice runs, converted a bunch of 3rd downs, and kicked a FG (after a Hakeem Nicks drop in the end zone).  Then Baas hurt his knee, and it was back to the comedy offense that we've seen for the rest of the season, featuring defensive tackles consistently in the backfield 1.5 seconds after the snap.  (Apart from interior OL, the team's other big problem is Special Teams.  The defense isn't that bad, so long as the offense/STs aren't constantly handing the ball to the opposition.) 

[kgambit]

 

 

Starting Josh Freeman after a whole week and a half to learn the system was... an interesting decision.  About a third of his throws came in roughly 8 feet over the receivers' heads. 

 

 

It looks like the Vikes have decided that Ponder and Cassel aren't the answer.  As you said, throwing Freeman in after less than two weeks was - interesting.  lol

 

Looks like Jacksonville, Tampa, NY Giants and the Vikes are all playing for the #1 draft choice. 

[ManifestedISO]

OH MY GOD BILL COWHER JUST SAID ON NATIONAL TV THE CHARGERS COULD MAKE THE PLAYOFFS

 

 

[Inyourprime]

DID YOU SEE THAT FIST PUMP JIM SCHWARTZ THREW. Haha. What an ass. Both he and Harbaugh in an elite class by themselves.

[kgambit]

How did the Cowboys force 5 Detroit turnovers and still lose?

[Keyrock]

How did the Cowboys force 5 Detroit turnovers and still lose?

Because they're the Cowboys and they are complete garbage incapable of winning a game even when the opposing team tries its darndest to hand it to them.  Yet Jason Garrett somehow still has a job...

[babaganoosh13]

Jerry can't hold on to a half-decent coach, because he knows best.

 

EDIT: This was from Lee on Deadspin's Why your team sucks last year:

 

If I started typing now and typed until my fingers bled, until I cramped up from carpal tunnel, until I went blind from staring at my computer screen, until I dropped 150 pounds from lack of nourishment, until my skin dried up and turned to dust from dehydration and ultimately until I simply keeled over and died (and this would all take quite a while because I'm not small), I wouldn't even be able to scratch the surface covering the surface of how much I hate Jerry Jones.

 

He has destroyed the Dallas Cowboys. Destroyed them. He has done NOTHING to contribute to the success of the franchise. NOTHING. His teams won three Super Bowls only because he happened to be a roommate at Arkansas of Jimmy Johnson, who never especially liked him. Jimmy won those Super Bowls, all three of them, even the one he didn't coach. And what did Jerry do after Jimmy won two straight championships and looked poised to win four or five in a row? FIRED HIM. Fired him! Barry Switzer's second team had enough runoff talent from Jimmy's squads to win one more Super Bowl, and then that was it. Jerry was on the path to destruction.

 

The Dallas Cowboys have existed since 1960. They played in their first Super Bowl in the 1970 season and won the Super Bowl for the first time in 1971. Even with the down years of the ‘80s (and there were really only a few…), Dallas has never gone as long without playing in or winning a Super Bowl as it has in the current championship drought. The former record for futility was 1977-1992 (1978 if you're counting Super Bowl appearances and not just wins). Now, though, the Cowboys have failed to play in a Super Bowl since 1995. We're going on 17 years here, and they're no closer to winning one than they were when Dave Campo was coach. They have a huge, obnoxious, outrageously expensive stadium and an owner (and general manager! WTF?) with a nearly incomprehensible ego. They have a puppet coach and a bunch of scrubs on defense. They're an empty vessel, all hat and no cattle.

 

Oh, I know. Browns fans and Lions fans don't want to hear it. Fair enough. But most people don't realize what the Cowboys meant to those of us who grew up in Dallas in the ‘70s and ‘80s. They were ALL WE HAD. The Rangers perennially sucked. The Mavericks were a flash in the pan for a season or two in the late ‘80s. The Stars were in Minnesota, where they belonged. The SWC imploded. The Cowboys were the pride of Dallas, an elite franchise with only a minor cocaine problem (and, at least, with a coach who genuinely had character). NOTHING mattered more than Cowboys football.

 

Jerry has taken all of that away. He has destroyed the dignity of the franchise, along with destroying the competitiveness of the franchise. (Seriously, Quincy Carter. Really. They're still trying to recover from that pick.) The Cowboys are a brand now, not a football team. Rex's fat brother has created a defense about as impenetrable as a sidewalk drain. Yet he still brags about it. It's easy to see why Rex is a head coach and Rob is a DC. Rob is a pretty good description of what the man does to the Cowboys when he collects a paycheck.

 

The worst part, though, is that Cowboy "fans," the worst in the NFL, still lap this [sheet] up. They manage to live on the success of nearly two decades ago, even though a lot of them don't remember it. They're incredibly obnoxious with nothing to back it up. And the worst part is that they seem to be perennially happy. "Hey, look at our stadium! Whoo, our uniforms look awesome! Remember Emmitt Smith?" Hey, Cowboy fans, YOUR TEAM [fudge]ING BLOWS. Quit with the living in the past, with the worshiping the star, with treating Jerry as if he's anything but Satan incarnate hell bent on wrecking what was once the best thing North Texas had going for it. Seriously, SHUT THE [fudge] UP. You look like a bunch of redneck a**holes, which, of course, you are. You and Jerry deserve each other.

 

And Brad

 

If you are a fan of the Cowboys who was born in the 80's this pretty much sums up the coaching situation and general relationship with the team. Your Mother (Jerry Jones) and Father (Jimmy Johnson) faked love for a few years together and everything was glorious for you as a child. Your Dad was smart, had a good job, great hair, and always gave you the most kick ass birthday and Christmas gifts (great draft picks, Super Bowl rings). This was life, it was the picket fence, the puppy, the whole nine yards! Your life was a ****ing postcard. All the other kids were jealous of you.

 

Mom smiled on the outside, but secretly bitched to her friends about being underappreciated and was constantly a giant controlling **** to your Dad. Eventually, your Dad got tired of your Mom's constant ****ery and decided to go through the REAL Big D. They smiled, tried to break the news softly to you, Dad said he'd pick you up on the weekends and you guys would play catch. Two weeks later, he met a Cuban woman and moved to Miami to never be heard from again.

 

Mom told you everything would be fine. You guys got to keep the house and Dad's convertible (the team he built) and things weren't that bad the first couple of years. Mom met a new guy, Barry. Barry seemed cool, he showed you his college championship ring, let you see his gun before he packed it up for business trips, and Mom let Barry take you joy riding in Dad's old convertible. You really didn't miss Dad that much for the first couple of years. Then Barry took a lot of pain killers one night and crashed Dad's convertible into a telephone pole at 120 mph.

 

Mom dumped Barry's no-good ass and **** bounced around from loser to loser for a few years. You guys fell on financial hard times (Salary Capped) because your Mother burned through any money left from your Dad like an NBA lottery pick and you started to have to buy cereal with no box (Eddie George), eat beenie weenies for supper (Vinny Testaverde), and kids made fun of you at school for wearing fake misspelled JORDEN shoes (This pretty much sums up any roster Jerry assembled from 1999 to 2004.) Life was ****. You sometimes wished you'd never had things so great with your Dad, it was just a cruel reminder of how great some people (Pat's Fans) lives are. Mom made your life so miserable you wished Jerry Sandusky would adopt you.

 

Then Mom hooked up with grumpy old War Vet named Bill. Bill was somehow able to get your Mother to get her **** together. He got you moved out of the ghetto and into a semi-new apartment that at least had a pool. Bill could be a raging Viagra-fueled ****, but at least he was making things better. Unfortunately, he watched Tony Romo stumble**** the Cowboys out of their best shot to win a Super Bowl in a decade, and had a coronary and died. She tried to see if another senior citizen named Wade was worth a shag. He was a nice guy but he turned out to be a huge **** and let your Mom walk all over him and eventually she lost interest.

 

Now Mom is blowing a red headed douche who used to work for your Dad as a Temp, and is a constant reminder of how awesome life was at one time, and how it will never be the same again. Basically, your Mom (Jerry Jones) is a huge ****.

 

Edited October 27, 2013 by babaganoosh13

[Keyrock]

I won't be quite as colorful about it, but I basically agree.  Until Jerry swallows his pride, hires a real GM and a real coach and actually lets them do their jobs, unimpeded, the Cowboys will always fail.  ALWAYS.  They will never win with Jerry managing and coaching the team, and rest assured he is the one coaching this team.  The worst part is that nothing will change until Jerry swallows his pride and that's never going to happen.  He won't sell the team either because despite their continual mediocrity, they are financially profitable.

[kgambit]

And Bill Barnwell  of Grantland piles on:

 

http://www.grantland.com/story/_/id/9876519/bill-barnwell-jerry-jones-cowboys

[babaganoosh13]

A bright side might be if he starts drafting the fastest person left when it's his turn. Although the Raiders haven't really turned it around yet since Al died.

 

I guess a side-effect of being a Blackhawks fan is I now think that a franchise can turn things around shortly after their crappy old owner dies.