Allan the family wrecker

[Darth InSidious]

Alan, your cousin sounds like an idiot, and a drippy one at that. Ignore her melodrama. Don't avoid family occasions, but if she's still in mid-tantrum the next time you see her, laugh in her face.

 

It's the reaction childish attention-seeking like that deserves.

 

 

By god I am really tired of being treated like a 5 year old by the language filter. I think it's time it went away.

IIRC, this is what's called the S c u n t h o r p e Problem.

[Gorgon]

hwat, North Lincolnshire...

[alanschu]

Not that I care, the entire premise of this "argument" is insane but this drive for you to delete this stuff and then write her a personal message is where I'm getting lost. Most people are non confrontational, so why was there a need to take this to the next level, why the effort? From what I gather you are a smart dude Alan so there must have been a reason for you being insecure/incensed enough to pm her and go through with this retarded charade.

 

I deleted the entire link (reposted it with a disclaimer about the content though) to clear up the confusion about the link, in addition to my perception that making such comments about the woes of violent media in the comment section of violent media that I not only posted, but actually created, was somewhat in poor taste.

 

I have dealt with the apparent woes of violent media from much of my extended family my entire life. On several occasions I had to hear it from my various aunts, or through my parents, because I was a corrupting influence on their children (my cousins) for exposing them to to violent video games and violent movies. Heck, when I was ten or eleven years old I got in trouble from my aunt for watching American Ninja 2 with my one year older cousin, a decidedly tame movie that may have ninjas getting beaten up in it. Comments in passing about the inappropriateness of me playing Double Dragon II on my Nintendo as a ten year old, and stupid stuff like that.

 

 

in fact it's better you never say anything because you can never be a moron unless you open your mouth.

 

Disagree. If I never say anything then people that do stuff that annoys me have no reason not to continue doing that activity. This isn't even malevolent, in that someone could be doing something that bothers me without the intention of actually bothering me, and they could go and do the activity somewhere else. For instance, if I'm trying to sleep and it's 12 AM, and my roommates are playing NHL 10 and I can hear them celebrating their goals and whatnot, if I say nothing then there's no reason for them to believe that they are being loud enough to keep me awake. However, I get up and go and ask them to try to keep it down, and then they are aware that they were being loud and put the effort into being quieter.

 

I think a big problem with people is that they are decidedly too non-confrontational a lot of the time, and as a result we as human beings don't know how to communicate very well with each other in tense moments. To compound the factor, but if someone has repeatedly done an activity dozens of times, and then suddenly I comment on it, there will be additional confusion and defensiveness because the activity didn't warrant a response all the times before.

[GreasyDogMeat]

That story about the gophers almost sounds like a joke, with the comments about guts flying.

Its not gopher hunting without an anti-tank rifle.

[kirottu]

Heck, when I was ten or eleven years old I got in trouble from my aunt for watching American Ninja 2 with my one year older cousin, a decidedly tame movie that may have ninjas getting beaten up in it.

 

Alan, the youth corrupter with evil American Ninja 2 movie!

 

[Gfted1]

Very interesting. So, for the majority of your life you've know that your family members dont approve, yet you continue to defy their wishes and do it. Someone should have confronted you long ago so you would know their feelings.....

[Oner]

BTW Alan, do they bug you because you're working on computer games? If so, tell them that your job is debugging and if games induce violent behavior then a game full of bugs would only give them a casus belli.

[alanschu]

Very interesting. So, for the majority of your life you've know that your family members dont approve, yet you continue to defy their wishes and do it. Someone should have confronted you long ago so you would know their feelings.....

 

That commentary was referring to my own inaction for never saying anything about it. Particularly in later years when it's more difficult to simply dismiss my concerns as the whims of a child. But yes, I'm a giant deviant. Despite the fact that my parents actually took some time during those pesky child rearing days to ensure that I understood the differences between make believe violence and real violence. Having said that, I certainly was NOT defying my parents wishes. I just had to endure the criticism that stemmed from their self-righteous attitudes. Though perhaps you're stating that my extended family is better suited to raise me as opposed to my nuclear family. Furthermore, it's simply their attempts to make decisions for me. You're quite ardently against institutions like the government telling you what you can and cannot like, and how you should spend your time and money. I extend those same concerns to everyone.

 

I won't dispute that there are times that people should keep their mouths shut. I have no problems not saying anything to much of my family on things regarding religions, since many of them are very religious and making a stink about having to stand around as someone says grace before a meal is something not particularly worth mentioning. I don't even really find it offensive, I just disagree with a lot of it. However, were I to start making commentaries to them about how I feel about a great many people that have interacted with me based on religious grounds, it'd be their failing to say nothing about it if my comments offended them. If I go about it as cluelessly as she did, there'd be no reason to conclude that I was being offensive if no one made any comments. On the other hand, I know some of them are pretty devout, and I exercise some judgment that perhaps making some commentary about my opinion on religion to them is probably not the best way to not offend them.

 

 

For the record, this is also the FIRST time I had ever heard anything of the sort from a family member of my generation (i.e. not aunts and uncles, grandparents etc.). I'm not particularly keen on having someone make comments about how she feels all violence is wrong and "never right" in response to , especially when in the past she certainly seemed to quite content with it. Given her framing of her original comment as a statement of disbelief that someone could consider the content posted in my video as entertainment, it very much seemed like a judgmental statement. Even though I am skeptical that she is incapable of understanding that violent imagery can be entertaining to people (especially since I've watched violent movies with her in the past and she), I still gave her the benefit of the doubt and responded with examples of violence from other forms of entertainment. She decided to respond to that by stating she completely against violence (a hypocritical stance at that), and that it's in no way right in any form of media, while also telling me sensational stories of the corrupting influence of violence and the resulting innocence lost. It doesn't seem like the smartest thing to say to someone who obviously has no issues with violence being displayed in entertainment.

 

 

BTW Alan, do they bug you because you're working on computer games?

 

As I grew up the issue got raised less and less by family. I'd like to assume that people simply decided to stop parenting me. Of course, I also no longer bring my nintendo over to family get together for all of us kids to play violent video games, so the opportunity doesn't present itself as much anymore. Most people have expressed support for me finding a job that I enjoy. Though I do wonder if they realize that the company I work for indeed makes violent video games.

Edited October 22, 2009 by alanschu

[jaguars4ever]

That's what you get for having a Canadian family: Disarmed Americans with health care.

[CoM_Solaufein]

They will have their revenge!

 

I would have ignored her personally. She obviously has some issues with herself and so called violence.

[alanschu]

Haha that pic is awesome.

[Gfted1]

*Wall of text crits Gfted1 for 9999*

 

I just find the irony delicious is all. Youre all RARG ALAN SMASH HYPOCRICY then turn around and be an utter hypocrit in the fact that you expect other people to respect your wishes when you bring something that bothers you to their attention yet youve known their feelings on violence most of your life and still choose to expose their children to it, just because you feel violence is ok. I suggest you defriend yourself.

[Oner]

*Wall of text crits Gfted1 for 9999*

 

I just find the irony delicious is all. Youre all RARG ALAN SMASH HYPOCRICY then turn around and be an utter hypocrit in the fact that you expect other people to respect your wishes when you bring something that bothers you to their attention yet youve known their feelings on violence most of your life and still choose to expose their children to it, just because you feel violence is ok. I suggest you defriend yourself.

For the record, this is also the FIRST time I had ever heard anything of the sort from a family member of my generation (i.e. not aunts and uncles, grandparents etc.).

?

[alanschu]

*Wall of text crits Gfted1 for 9999*

 

I just find the irony delicious is all. Youre all RARG ALAN SMASH HYPOCRICY then turn around and be an utter hypocrit in the fact that you expect other people to respect your wishes when you bring something that bothers you to their attention yet youve known their feelings on violence most of your life and still choose to expose their children to it, just because you feel violence is ok. I suggest you defriend yourself.

 

 

You do realize I'm discussing criticism that happened when I was a child growing up right?

 

I haven't "exposed" any children to violent media since I was in fact a child myself. It's not like I'm a 28 year old running around watching violent movies with kids today. Futhermore, whenever my aunts/uncles requested that I stop watching a particular movie because they considered it to violent for their kids, I always complied. It's what a lot of 10 year olds do.

 

 

If you'd like me to admit that I didn't really have a full understanding of my utter hypocrisy of how I behaved 19 years ago compared to now, then you got me. Some pretty stiff standards you have there.

Edited October 22, 2009 by alanschu

[Aristes]

I'd just switch to decaf, Allan. You do seem to get up in arms about stuff a bit quickly.

 

...Although I do subscribe to the idea that those gophers had weapons of mass destructions. They got what they deserved, rat bastards!

[alanschu]

I am certainly shorter fused than I have been in the past.

 

 

 

I blame me letting it all build up

[Walsingham]

She doesn't like violence? Have you pointed out that this is about as sensible as getting upset about gravity?

[Darth InSidious]

She doesn't like violence? Have you pointed out that this is about as sensible as getting upset about gravity?

From the sound of things, she's the type to take the idea of disagreeing with her as tantamount to treason.

[Deadly_Nightshade]

It's not your fault - in fact you've not really done anything wrong as far as I can tell.

[Gorth]

I'm a giant deviant.

The core of the problem

 

Maybe you live in a different world than they do? While they have their moral values, you have been consorting with the likes of Eletronic Arts and Dungeon & Dragons. We all know who they are agents for

 

She doesn't like violence? Have you pointed out that this is about as sensible as getting upset about gravity?

I know a lot of women who are upset about gravity. Cf. liposuction

[Oner]

Maybe you live in a different world than they do? While they have their moral values, you have been consorting with the likes of Eletronic Arts and Dungeon & Dragons. We all know who they are agents for

Elvis? Steven Segal? Q?

[I want teh kotor 3]

 

Always knew he was female.

[LadyCrimson]

Based only on what was said in your first post, it feels to me like you over-reacted a little bit to her decision to share her feelings about media violence (what you quoted didn't seem particularly judgmental on a personal level, ie directly at you), but then she turned around and over-reacted at your response. I don't know her so you'd know far better her possible hidden meanings behind actions, but sometimes people just like to...explain *why* they don't like (or like) something, even when not asked. A way of sharing who they are, perhaps. Dunno.

 

Still, her being initially miffed, ok, but deleting from facebook and complaining to other family members...that's a bit much. She could've at least waited for a few more rounds of possibly escalating emails/posts.

Edited October 23, 2009 by LadyCrimson

[jaguars4ever]

Ah...I can feel the love.

 

You know what this thread needs? More b00bies!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Walsingham]

Personally, I find I can get along with almost anyone EXCEPT my family. If you take my advice you'll start whistling a merry tune, and never think of the fools again.