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Things you'd like to say but don't/can't


Guest The Architect

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Guest The Architect

I have to admit, sometimes some truly horrible things come to mind that I could say but opt not to most of the time, which is pretty much the same case for everyone else, because it's inappropriate, way too hurtful or might result in getting my head smacked in.

 

I'd like to tell every Muslim I see to stick their religious rule up their ass about Muslim women having to wear headscarf's and cover themselves up so as to not tempt the men because they can't keep their **** in their pants. I'd like to tell every ugly looking woman I see wearing tight, whorish clothing that they can wear clothes as tight as they want, but that doesn't make them any less ugly. I would've liked to have told this bitchy woman at the liquor store to try shaving her chin once in a while, but I'm not going back there again. I'd like to tell every vain muscular guy I see that in case they didn't already know, that they're gay.

 

So what about you guys? What have you wanted to say but have held back from saying?

 

Yeah go on, say it. "I'd like to say this thread sucks, but I won't, because... oh wait, I just did."

 

And keep a lid on it, mods. Don't go getting your knickers in a twist over this thread, I doubt anybody's views here are that offensive.

Edited by The Architect
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Guest The Architect

You know it's funny how when someone asks you a potentially embarrassing question and they want you to be honest about your answer, when you give them a truthful answer they say, "You shouldn't say things like that." or "Don't say that!" You get the picture. I mean why ask a sensitive question if you're afraid of hearing an answer you'd rather not have heard?

 

A good example of this is, a story I heard of an 86 year old man who walked into a crowded waiting room at the doctors receptionist. The receptionist says, "Yes, sir, what are you seeing the doctor for today?" "There's something wrong with my ****," the old man replies.

 

The receptionist became irritated and said, "You shouldn't come into a crowded waiting room and say things like that." "Why not? You asked me what was wrong and I told you," he said back. The receptionist replied; "Now you've caused some embarrassment in this room full of people. You should have said there is something wrong with your ear or something, and discussed the problem further with the doctor in private."

 

The man replied, "You shouldn't ask people questions in a room full of strangers, if the answer could embarrass anyone." The old man walked out, waited several minutes and then re-entered. The receptionist smiled smugly and asked, "Yes?" "There's something wrong with my ear", he said.

 

The receptionist nodded approvingly and smiled, knowing he had taken her advice. "And what is wrong with your ear, sir?"

 

"I can't piss out of it," he replied.

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I'm currently negotiating a project, and would dearly love to tell my counterpart that they're deranged, and have totally unrealistic expectations.

"It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"."

             -Elwood Blues

 

tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.

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I'd like to tell every vegetarian that for any animal they don't eat, I'm going to eat two. Also, if they are doing it to save the animals, I'd tell them how much deforestation soy bean farming causes as well as how many small mammals die due to their harvest.

 

I would like to tell all the dutch muslims that for every mosque they build in this country I'm going to build a church wherever they came from and for every church that gets destroyed a mosque will share it's fate.

 

In fact, speaking of religious people, I would like to tell them that the universe is so enormously big that our entire species means absolutely nothing. Then I'd tell them that if they think they could possibly have the right idea or that any universal force is looking out for someone as insignificant as them then they are by that moment effectively the most arrogant person in that enormous universe.

 

I'd like to tell most of my extended family that they should stay the **** out of my house.

 

I'd like to tell the internet that just because it gives you anonimity that doesn't mean you get to act like a ****ing douche.

 

I'd like to tell my neighbours that if they don't move someone might soon burn their house down just so they would leave.

 

I'd like to tell the 90's that they sucked.

 

I'd like to tell Japan fangirls and fanboys that they should get their ass to Japan if they like it too much and keep my ears free from their bullcrap.

 

I'd like to tell emo kids that they should stop teasing us and push the razor in deeper.

 

I'd like to tell modern animals that they are not nearly as cool as dinosaurs.

 

More if I think of any.

 

Oh yeah, I'd like to tell the mods that they're asshats for no other reason than to kick against the local authority.

Edited by TrueNeutral
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I would like to call everything that is gay, gay. But I promised Mr. Walsingham that I would find another word, like... anyone got an idea?

DISCLAIMER: Do not take what I write seriously unless it is clearly and in no uncertain terms, declared by me to be meant in a serious and non-humoristic manner. If there is no clear indication, asume the post is written in jest. This notification is meant very seriously and its purpouse is to avoid misunderstandings and the consequences thereof. Furthermore; I can not be held accountable for anything I write on these forums since the idea of taking serious responsability for my unserious actions, is an oxymoron in itself.

 

Important: as the following sentence contains many naughty words I warn you not to read it under any circumstances; botty, knickers, wee, erogenous zone, psychiatrist, clitoris, stockings, bosom, poetry reading, dentist, fellatio and the department of agriculture.

 

"I suppose outright stupidity and complete lack of taste could also be considered points of view. "

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I'd ask a ****load of questions.

"Alright, I've been thinking. When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade - make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons, what am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager. Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons. Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons. I'm going to to get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!"

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I would like to call everything that is gay, gay. But I promised Mr. Walsingham that I would find another word, like... anyone got an idea?

 

I did offer you the word 'Walsingham' as a pejorative.

"It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"."

             -Elwood Blues

 

tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.

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I'd like to tell everyone that they are jerks, and it's not ok to have these thoughts and think you aren't a jerk by thinking them. Because you totally are : (

Lou Gutman, P.I.- It's like I'm not even trying anymore!
http://theatomicdanger.iforumer.com/index....theatomicdanger

One billion b-balls dribbling simultaneously throughout the galaxy. One trillion b-balls being slam dunked through a hoop throughout the galaxy. I can feel every single b-ball that has ever existed at my fingertips. I can feel their collective knowledge channeling through my viens. Every jumpshot, every rebound and three-pointer, every layup, dunk, and free throw. I am there.

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Things I probably shouldn't say but most likely will:

 

I'd like to tell the people pressing Bibles on people at my college to ****-off.

 

I'd like to tell almost every employee of my local Gamestop that they know nothing about games or gaming and thus should not try to recommend products to me.

 

I'd like to tell most forum administrators and moderators, although this will not apply to any here as far as I know, that they are on power-trips and should not ban people simply for disagreeing with them.

 

Things I should most likely say but will probably not:

 

I'd like to tell one of my friends that her significant other, who is an asshat, has been sleeping around and has no plans to stop doing so.

 

I'd like to tell my boss' boss that my boss is unqualified, unprofessional, and has done nothing but leech off the credit of others. He also violates company policy by trying to "save" the employees under him; evidently this jerk is a evangelical minister as well as an asshat.

 

I'd like to tell most of my extended family that I really do not want to go on vacation with them, nor do I want them visiting.

"Geez. It's like we lost some sort of bet and ended up saddled with a bunch of terrible new posters on this forum."

-Hurlshot

 

 

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That would be a very long list... a wonder that my head doesn't explode due to the internal pressure from things I would like to say.

 

As for what I would like to say, but can't? I can't say :lol:

“He who joyfully marches to music in rank and file has already earned my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, since for him the spinal cord would surely suffice.” - Albert Einstein

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I would like to tell people, well I guess continue to tell people, that the world around them is what they imagine it might be. The holodeck in our head creates reality - use it wisely ...

The universe is change;
your life is what our thoughts make it
- Marcus Aurelius (161)

:dragon:

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I'd like to tell my boss' boss that my boss is unqualified, unprofessional, and has done nothing but leech off the credit of others. He also violates company policy by trying to "save" the employees under him; evidently this jerk is a evangelical minister as well as an asshat.

Nothing says what you really feel like Pr0n...:wink:

Buy some filthy mag. Anything less than $5 order in his name and send to his home address if he's married and to work if he's not. Maybe some gay leather bondage subscription if you think that might cause him some distress. I've got the addy for the KKK around here somewhere if you can use it to amuse your friend. I did this for Oral Roberts ( real name of Gailwrath ) when God was holding him hostage for a paltry $3M back in the mid 80s. I do hope he enjoyed his new latex playmate. I happened to visit family in Okkieville during that time and pasted a couple of stickers on the Welcome sign to his Prayer Tower...'God must love thieves, He let so many run churches' and 'Next time you feel perfect try walking on water'. That's when I learned that the women in the family had bigger stones than the 'men'. The 'men' stayed home during the 'sticker run'. The women were all for it. The 'mens' nuts were out on loan during that time obviously. :wink:

 

Order him a subscription to Boy's Life if you wish to be less chancy. It did wonders for Michael J. That's why he only needs one glove.

Ruminations...

 

When a man has no Future, the Present passes too quickly to be assimilated and only the static Past has value.

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Tarna for US Foreign thingy. Take that, Somali militants!

"It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"."

             -Elwood Blues

 

tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.

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