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Funny Stuff Cantina


Hurlshort

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Sorry I keep posting these, I think I have a bit of a girl crush on the wife. She's so adorable and she has that rock music video dance down pat. 😄
And riced cauliflower is indeed not rice. Stir fried with stuff and some marinade or soy based sauces it's pretty good but yeah...no one's gonna truly mistake it for rice.  Has a bit of a sour flavor you have to offset, too.

 

 

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“Things are as they are. Looking out into the universe at night, we make no comparisons between right and wrong stars, nor between well and badly arranged constellations.” – Alan Watts
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dGax5t5DpV2jtILxezYtQO0ooDVxOfBZUuBmNcqC

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Civilization, in fact, grows more and more maudlin and hysterical; especially under democracy it tends to degenerate into a mere combat of crazes; the whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, most of them imaginary. - H.L. Mencken

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My DnD players adopted a 1 HP slug from a swamp early on during the campaign, and named it Squinky. Every time it horribly dies, they use necromancy to bring it back to life.

On the third or fourth time they brought it back to life, I had a nearby druid offer to cast Speak With Animals on it. They said “awe that sounds fun.”

After only being able to make barely-audible glug noises all campaign, Squinky finally got to speak its mind:

“Only a fool would postulate that nothing’s worse than torture and death. For I am a clock, in a loop of break and repair. Stopped, only to be wound back. Life is not trivial, but existence without death certainly is a meaningless one. Who am I but a humble slug, brought back to the brink of life only to be slaughtered again and again. Frozen. Stepped on. Ripped to shreds from the inside out. And yet, today I awake again, wondering which new form of torture awaits. This is not living, for I have already lived. Living is to be, then to cease. To be without ceasing is not living, it is torture beyond that which any mortal can fathom. Remember that, next time you fear death. Death is a gift. It is eternal life that you should fear.”

    - Squinky

 

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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2 hours ago, Raithe said:

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OMG... I've been there too 😂

 

Send in the search and rescue team indeed!

 

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“He who joyfully marches to music in rank and file has already earned my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, since for him the spinal cord would surely suffice.” - Albert Einstein
 

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Quote for the Day: “If you haven’t done anything wrong then you have nothing to hide.” Honey do you think I lock the bathroom door because ****ting is against the law?

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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1 hour ago, Gorth said:

OMG... I've been there too 😂

 

Send in the search and rescue team indeed!

 

I confess, I don't get the appeal of TVtropes.  

I cannot - yet I must. How do you calculate that? At what point on the graph do "must" and "cannot" meet? Yet I must - but I cannot! ~ Ro-Man

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Edited by Malcador

Why has elegance found so little following? Elegance has the disadvantage that hard work is needed to achieve it and a good education to appreciate it. - Edsger Wybe Dijkstra

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2 hours ago, Raithe said:

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Very specific set of nutjobs, I wonder why

I'm the enemy, 'cause I like to think, I like to read. I'm into freedom of speech, and freedom of choice. I'm the kinda guy that likes to sit in a greasy spoon and wonder, "Gee, should I have the T-bone steak or the jumbo rack of barbecue ribs with the side-order of gravy fries?" I want high cholesterol! I wanna eat bacon, and butter, and buckets of cheese, okay?! I wanna smoke a Cuban cigar the size of Cincinnati in the non-smoking section! I wanna run naked through the street, with green Jell-O all over my body, reading Playboy magazine. Why? Because I suddenly may feel the need to, okay, pal? I've SEEN the future. Do you know what it is? It's a 47-year-old virgin sitting around in his beige pajamas, drinking a banana-broccoli shake, singing "I'm an Oscar Meyer Wiene"

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1 hour ago, Chilloutman said:

Very specific set of nutjobs, I wonder why

It's missing the wingnut, but I suppose that's not specific to the far right. 😄

"It has just been discovered that research causes cancer in rats."

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