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Funny Stuff: The Funny Strikes Back


Amentep

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I just LOVE it when problems solve themselves! :lol:

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"The man of virtuous soul commands not, nor obeys. Power, like a desolating pestilence, pollutes whate'er it touches; and obedience, bane of all genius, virtue, freedom, truth, makes slaves of men, and of the human frame a mechanized automaton."

P.B. Shelley

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Between global warming melting the ice caps and now the future of American democracy hinging on the fate of the post office, I think we all owe Kevin Costner an apology.

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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3 minutes ago, Raithe said:

EfA8fgyWoAAVMtO?format=jpg&name=900x900

How the hell did you guys conquer the world being such wusses?

I'd say the answer to that question is kind of like the answer to "who's the sucker in this poker game?"*

 

*If you can't tell, it's you. ;)

village_idiot.gif

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History Department Recruiter: "You there! Do you like historical fiction? Period dramas? Historically themed films, tv shows, and video games?"

Prospective Student: "Yes!"

History Department Recruiter: "Would you like not to?"

"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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1 minute ago, Orogun01 said:

How the hell did you guys conquer the world being such wusses?

Because we were just that damned good at it.

tumblr_n8op8zfCvi1tsxhieo4_400.gifv

Mad dogs and Englishmen, wot?

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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"The greatest trick the English ever pulled was convince the world they didn't exist."

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"My hovercraft is full of eels!" - Hungarian tourist
I am Dan Quayle of the Romans.
I want to tattoo a map of the Netherlands on my nether lands.
Heja Sverige!!
Everyone should cuffawkle more.
The wrench is your friend. :bat:

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14 hours ago, Orogun01 said:

How the hell did you guys conquer the world being such wusses?

simple, they chose enemies who couldn't fight back

The words freedom and liberty, are diminishing the true meaning of the abstract concept they try to explain. The true nature of freedom is such, that the human mind is unable to comprehend it, so we make a cage and name it freedom in order to give a tangible meaning to what we dont understand, just as our ancestors made gods like Thor or Zeus to explain thunder.

 

-Teknoman2-

What? You thought it was a quote from some well known wise guy from the past?

 

Stupidity leads to willful ignorance - willful ignorance leads to hope - hope leads to sex - and that is how a new generation of fools is born!


We are hardcore role players... When we go to bed with a girl, we roll a D20 to see if we hit the target and a D6 to see how much penetration damage we did.

 

Modern democracy is: the sheep voting for which dog will be the shepherd's right hand.

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14 hours ago, Orogun01 said:

How the hell did you guys conquer the world being such wusses?

You'd be surprised just how far arrogance and an air of superiority can get you. People, especially in large groups, are idiots, so if you carry yourself like you're better than they are, a shockingly large percentage will just believe you. :shifty:

Edited by Keyrock
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rowsdower_sig.jpg.0f13980282a9229af0f1609eb6dee060.jpg
I wonder if there is beer on the sun

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The truth is that the English have been, historically, very focused, very effective genocidal imperialistic maniacs. They were also particularly good at the whole dividing and conquering thing.

 

So the whole "we're posh, prudish, sensitive buggers who stammer a lot and star in romantic comedies" is just a big sham. I imagine 18th and 19th century English people driving colonization were probably more like Jeremy Irons playing a villain than like Hugh Grant playing some kind of knob.

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"My hovercraft is full of eels!" - Hungarian tourist
I am Dan Quayle of the Romans.
I want to tattoo a map of the Netherlands on my nether lands.
Heja Sverige!!
Everyone should cuffawkle more.
The wrench is your friend. :bat:

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To be fair, things like India wasn't even a government decision. Hell, as far as personal correspondence at the time has shown, the actual people in government were rather annoyed with the East India Company about that whole thing. Then they just had to run with the ball or it would have been a very bad job indeed.

 

"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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Right-Wingers in 2016:   "We're not facsists, that's hyperbolic nonsense!"

 

Right-Wingers in 2020:  "If you didn't want to be abducted by the secret police, you shouldn't have been outside with different thoughts than me."

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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Okay, point of thought:

According to Star Trek, future clothes pretty much all look like pajamas.

What if 2020 is the year that happened - because quarantine?

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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9 minutes ago, Raithe said:

Okay, point of thought:

According to Star Trek, future clothes pretty much all look like pajamas.

What if 2020 is the year that happened - because quarantine?

If everyone looked this good in pajamas you could sign me up.

5269f89e690351a41d62b5f4a0775829.jpg

rowsdower_sig.jpg.0f13980282a9229af0f1609eb6dee060.jpg
I wonder if there is beer on the sun

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6 hours ago, Raithe said:

Right-Wingers in 2016:   "We're not facsists, that's hyperbolic nonsense!"

 

Right-Wingers in 2020:  "If you didn't want to be abducted by the secret police, you shouldn't have been outside with different thoughts than me."

Sorry that's not happening, there are no plains clothes policemen dragging people in the street. It not a secret, its just our journalist are too stupid to know the definition of secret and get triggered if you mention it.

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I'd say the answer to that question is kind of like the answer to "who's the sucker in this poker game?"*

 

*If you can't tell, it's you. ;)

village_idiot.gif

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"The truth is that the English have been, historically, very focused, very effective genocidal imperialistic maniacs. They were also particularly good at the whole dividing and conquering thing.

 

So the whole "we're posh, prudish, sensitive buggers who stammer a lot and star in romantic comedies" is just a big sham. I imagine 18th and 19th century English people driving colonization were probably more like Jeremy Irons playing a villain than like Hugh Grant playing some kind of knob."

 

They were just better at it than most everybody else. Every place they conquered were also full of tyrants and scumbags - this includes Afrika and the Amerikas. How many tribes in NA were wiped out ebfore Europeans even stepped foot here? But, everyone pretends that the Natives were singing  lovely songs and having a swell time smoking weed together - as opposed to conquering, raping, murdering, and wiping out entire tribes b/c they were different.

 

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Edited by Volourn

DWARVES IN PROJECT ETERNITY = VOLOURN HAS PLEDGED $250.

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maybe they compensate for the fact that their island has been conquered several times and they never managed to kick out the invaders.

the romans, the saxons and the vikings to name some. the only invasion they ever stopped was germany in ww2

c2a5tlutrm151.png

Edited by teknoman2

The words freedom and liberty, are diminishing the true meaning of the abstract concept they try to explain. The true nature of freedom is such, that the human mind is unable to comprehend it, so we make a cage and name it freedom in order to give a tangible meaning to what we dont understand, just as our ancestors made gods like Thor or Zeus to explain thunder.

 

-Teknoman2-

What? You thought it was a quote from some well known wise guy from the past?

 

Stupidity leads to willful ignorance - willful ignorance leads to hope - hope leads to sex - and that is how a new generation of fools is born!


We are hardcore role players... When we go to bed with a girl, we roll a D20 to see if we hit the target and a D6 to see how much penetration damage we did.

 

Modern democracy is: the sheep voting for which dog will be the shepherd's right hand.

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8 hours ago, Orogun01 said:

Sorry that's not happening, there are no plains clothes policemen dragging people in the street. It not a secret, its just our journalist are too stupid to know the definition of secret and get triggered if you mention it.

There is also a reason I put that in the "Funny Stuff" thread....

"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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To the lady at Costco with her son on a leash. I'm sorry that I asked if he was a rescue.

The profanity wasn't necessary but thank you for not siccing him on me."

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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1 hour ago, Raithe said:

EfITvdcWsAANBU0?format=jpg&name=small

"Karen" should put a condom on her head to keep safe.

Civilization, in fact, grows more and more maudlin and hysterical; especially under democracy it tends to degenerate into a mere combat of crazes; the whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, most of them imaginary. - H.L. Mencken

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