Guard Dog

It's hard to generalize living conditions in most states because, with some exceptions, they are large and diverse places. State tax is, of course, applied the same all over that state. Municipalities and counties might tack on a half percent or more but generally the tax burden for each state is uniform. How taxes are collected is also a factor. Some states tax income, others tax property, all tax sales to one extent or another. Your lifestyle preferences have a big impact on your tax burden. For most states (2/3 give or take) weather and geography is more or less the same. But this kind of fails on the bigger states. California is a good example. The Sacramento/Bay area, the LA/San Diego (everything south of Ventura & San Bernardino and west of Palm Springs), north of Sacramento, and everything in the high desert (Barstow, Mojave, Tahoe. Modoc, etc. are so radically different you'd think you were in a different country. Cost of living varies wildly in these places. Climate and weather varies quite a bit. Florida is another example. South Florida, Central Florida, and North Florida are VERY different economically and culturally. South Florida is VERY expensive just to maintain a middle class lifestyle. North Florida it's very easy to do that on the exact same money. It's hard to quantify one state having more crime than another because once you get out of the big metro areas crime rates plummet everywhere. Memphis is the closest big city to me but it's not that close. Where I live crime is practically non existent. Fifty miles south and it's the highest in the state and 18th highest in the USA. Real estate and housing prices also fluctuate wildly inside a state. That is something I know too well. In Tennessee lots with houses are much more expensive east of Nashville than they are west of Nashville. The reason is geography. West of Nashville is flat, spacious, redevelopment is constant and dynamic. East of Nashville is mountainous so fewer homes, more demand for existing homes, less construction of new homes drives up the value of what's there. Articles like that make for interesting reading but there are good retirement options in pretty much every state where you can live comfortably on a fixed income.

I don’t think seeing one in his arm last night was any easier. Thank God he’s doing better. I’d say hopefully you get some sleep tonight but I suspect you won’t get much. Still praying for you guys!

Yeah they can have my Facebook account. All I’ve ever done with it let’s trade jokes and occasionally keep up with my brother and his family. I only signed up so I could play chess on chess.net for free.

Speaking of that when I was on the phone with the realtor he was putting the full court press on selling the house. I think he knows I am somewhat interested but mostly torn and he’s trying to push me over the top. I was, somewhat naïvely, hoping when she comes down in two weeks she will fall in love with the place and start imagining some kind of a future here. But even if all that happens it’s not realistic. B is a grown woman living in her own apartment and going to school. But there is no way G will move 700 miles away from her. And it would not be right for me to ask her to. No matter how things are going. I hate adult problems

Are you home? Is he home? Is he still improving?

It’s funny you mention that. I asked her if she thought things were moving too fast. But she said we’re not making life decisions together. We’re just spending time with each other. And that’s true. It bothers me that it’s a long distance relationship. Those are usually doomed. Her life is there and my life is here. I don’t know how those two can be brought together. But I think it’s probably too early to worry about that. Those are problems for later. Maybe it will just work itself out on its own. For now I just thoroughly enjoy spending time with her and I think she feels the same. So we’ll just focus on that. In other news one of the lots I put up for sale got an offer. It’s a little bit under the asking price and the realtor advised me to counter or decline. I thought about it on the drive home yesterday. It’s not what I was hoping to get but it is more than enough for my share of the seed capital of a business venture I’m interested in. So I called him a little while ago and told him if the buyer is qualified to accept. That’s probably taking him off because he’s considering his commission LOL. Well, will play hardball on the other one. Right now I just need the cash.

Asthma? Allergy?Not COVID I assume or they would not be releasing him. I’m praying for your little guy and you & Mrs. Shady too.

Oh no what happened?

Started this one this morning.... while drinking coffee!

The GD soap opera (as the cheese turns)… final episode I got home from WI last night. I think it’s safe to say we’re doing really good so far. Especially since we just spent six days (SIX!) with each other. That is the dating equivalent to running a decathlon! I drove up early Monday and got to her place just before 6 PM. Well, first I stopped in West Salem and rented a hotel room. If for no other reason just so I could take a shower and change. Best sixty bucks I’ve ever spent. After over 11 hours driving I was beat and that recharged me. I hadn’t seen her house yet and it’s nice. She’s renting a small house a little ways out in the sticks. She had made a really nice dinner and our “first night” together was just perfect. Afterwards we stayed up talking until almost sunrise. It’s amazing we hadn’t run out of things to say to each other since we’ve spoken almost every day and even a few times while I was on the road up. Conversation with her is just so easy. The next day she had some rounds to make and I asked if I could come with and help. That was very cool. She is just a natural with animals. She told me she can relate better to animals than to people. That is something I can COMPLETEY understand. That night we went to LaCrosse and I took her and her daughter (her name IS Brie but she spells it Bri) out to dinner at this cool place called “Huck Finn’s on the Water”. So all through dinner this girl (she’s 20, college student) is staring at me like she was trying to bore through stone. G goes to the rest room and B pounces the moment she was gone. It was a short but memorable conversation that ended with “if you break my mother’s heart I will hunt you down!”. I have to tell you I respected her for that. Never had a conversation quite like that one, but I respected her for it. She is tough. A lot like her mother as it turned out. After we got back to her place we were sitting on the porch talking and she asked me what B said. I laughed and told her. She laughed but that was the segue into the first of several serious conversations we had last week. This was really the elephant in the room for her. She was divorced, I’m divorced twice. She wanted to know what happened. She wanted me to know what happened to her. I told her everything. Neither story was all that interesting if you ask me but she wanted to know every detail. I think she really wanted to know if I was still in touch with either of them. I told her the truth, that I had just broken three years of no contact with Steph but we’d only spoken once. I assured her there was no chance in hell of reconciling. I think continued contact with Steph would be a dealbreaker with her. Definitely something to think about since I have no feelings for Steph whatsoever. If casual conversation with her comes with a price it’s definitely not one I’d want to pay. Then she told me all of her story. Jesus. No matter how bad your s—t was I promise you there is someone who had it worse. A lot worse. He was B’s father and G’s only long term relationship in life. This f----g guy was just evil. I can’t imagine a better word to describe someone who spent 20 years putting them through what he did. Infidelity and emotional abuse and sometimes physical. The broken marriage trifecta. It sounds like he was a high functioning alcoholic. She said one of the things that attracted her to me was that I didn’t drink booze in any form. Anyway it had been five years since their divorce. The guy literally ghosted her after she had him served with a RO. He took all the money from their joint accounts and disappeared. He left them literally penniless. At the time B was only 13 and G was a 1/3 owner of the Vet practice she was working in. She had to sell their house and her stake in the practice just to cover the costs of the divorce, debts, and provide a basic living for her and B. Since the guy disappeared it took years and thousands of dollars to finalize. Finally he turned up, signed the papers and it was all over. Both her and B attended therapy for a long time to get over that. The next five years she dedicated to being B’s mom and trying to rebuild their lives. They are very close and both are amazingly resilient and tough. And both of these amazing ladies have serious battle scars on their hearts. I am always amazed at people’s capacity for cruelty to other people. Especially someone they had to have loved even a little. Anyway, some time after that she is sitting next to me on the couch, leaning her head on my shoulder, and said that she had never had or even considered another serious relationship since. Then she looks me in the eye and asked if that is what we have, a serious relationship? Now…. Here it the problem. And if anyone has any advice after the fact please speak up. I’ve already decided I’m crazy about her. If fact I was completely sure I was falling in love with her. But that male part of the brain is telling me not to rush in, to play it cool. Show a little but not too much so heart and brain were not on speaking terms at the moment. Annnd I froze. Words failed me and I said something lame. Ugh. I really thought I blew my chance right there. But… the next day I recovered. The first “I love you’s” were exchanged. LOL I think I was more relieved than happy! The rest of the week we just enjoyed each other’s company. We drove over to Sparta and double dated with my cousin and her husband. She (cousin) is overjoyed with how things are going. We went horseback riding on one of the equestrian trails in a park near town. G told me she had always been attracted to the “cowboy” outdoorsy type. I had told her I had half of that. I could expertly handle a revolver and my outdoorsman cred was unimpeachable… but I was no cowboy. A horse named Dottie certainly exposed THAT! I had no idea how to ride a horse and the horse knew it. The power in that relationship was definitely under the saddle not on top of it. But it was a lot of fun. Sunday came all too soon. I have some work to do on some of my properties this week so I had to come back yesterday. We talked about when we’d see each other again and it looks like it will be two weeks (a freaking eternity if you ask me) before she has a gap in her schedule. I told her I wanted her to come down and stay with me next time. I’d like her to see my place and let me treat her to a good time. She’s never been to Memphis. I got the sense the drive is off-putting for her. Can’t blame her there. It does suck. So this morning I got up early and bought a ticket on Delta from LaCrosse to Memphis, open ended, for two weeks from now. I put the ticket into a card I had bought for her and signed it with a quote from one of her favorite writers. I won’t say which or what it was because if you have gotten this far into the story and don’t think I’m already a total sap I don’t want to push you over. But I think she will like it. I put the card in the kitchen in front of the coffee maker so she will find it after I’d left. We shared a passionate goodbye kiss and I drove home. That was 24 hours ago and I already miss her. But she is coming here soon. Last night we were talking about the circumstances of our first meeting. She was actually supposed to visit Amy & Mark (cousin & husband) the day before we met. If she had, I would have been five hours north on the road from Bayfield. I told her how I came to be there and how Sunny’s passing had affected me. She knew I had recently lost my dog but not the details. When I want to get away I usually go to the Gulf Coast and go fishing. But because of Hurricane Ida I couldn’t. So I drove north with no particular destination and somehow ended up right where I was supposed to be when I was supposed to be there. It’s funny how the stars align. She said this was meant to be. Maybe it is, or maybe our luck is changing. Anyway, that is the third gargantuan ramble I’ve dropped on you guys. Three too many probably. It’s not the end of the story but it is the end of the beginning. If you have been reading I certainly appreciate you. If it’s TLDR I certainly don’t blame you. And if you have any advice on how I can avoid f—king this up please speak up!

LOL! Can’t sneak anything past you!

This would be a segue into one of my rants about the inherent evil of "government" but meh.... you've all heard it before so... government bad yadda yadda

That just sucks! Will you need surgery or just cortisone & physical therapy?

You guys are freaking KILLING me here! I met Gail’s daughter last night. Her name is Brie! Not BSing. Then I come here and read all this and spit coffee all over my phone! things are going well here. Very well! More details when I get home.

Hey you guys are awesome! Everyone of you. I’d be proud to call any of you a friend.

By this time tomorrow I'll be in Wisconsin. See you guys later!

How low can we go?

That is an interesting question. If you'd asked me 20 years ago if I loved my country my answer would have been an unequivocal "yes". Ask me now and I think I'd answer it differently. What is my country? I love my countrymen very much. Americans are generally good and decent people. On average we are generous, charitable, and are generally willing to help total strangers even if it's not 100% safe to do so. Plus we invented tailgate parties. You might argue that people living in prosperous nations where simple day to day survival is not an issue can afford to be so. But I've been to prosperous nations where that is not the case. Japan for example. Everyone is polite and respectful but if something bad happens you are own your own. Someone once described it to me as "millions of people alone together". That was my observation there as well. Social interaction between strangers just does no happen. It's not even uncommon in the US. I love that about us. On that note I found Canada & Mexico to be very similar to the US. I think because people travel freely between the three countries we all share more of a social culture than folks realize. There isn't much to love about the US government. Other than it somehow manages to not be it's worst self most of the time. That is something I guess. Mark Twain said "Patriotism is loyalty to your country all the time and loyalty to it's government only when it deserves it". I think that sums it up for me.

with all due respect to Dr. King I think a common enemy that could kick both of your butts would do a pretty good job of turning enemies into friends as well!

This is correct. Plus he is exploiting their concerns and giving them back very little in the way of help or relief in exchange for their support. Economics is complex. It cannot be distilled down to sound bites and political axioms. there certainly are things the government could be doing to help people who just want to work hard and provide a comfortable middle class lifestyle for their families. But, regardless of the outcome of any election they are not going to do it. The politicians will still shamelessly exploit the concerns of the middle class however.

That is amazing! I have been to senior living condominiums in assisted-living places before and they are seriously depressing. This sounds like anything but.

LOL just need someone to keep you warm!

I don’t know. I’ve never really thought about it. When I bought this place I had this idea of a completely self-sufficient property. A home that could generate its own electricity, grow its own food, supply its own water. I sort of have that. Not 100% but pretty close. Well it was a lot of work though. I can’t imagine I would ever want to live inside of a city limits again. Traffic, city ordinances, noise, meddlesome homeowners association‘s, crime, I never have to worry about any of that. It’s quiet here. Peaceful. My front porch faces east and my back porch faces west. I can sit and watch the sunrise in the morning and watch it set in the evening. There is no artificial light for miles and you’ve never seen more stars than I see here every night. I hear coyotes down in Anderson Tully. Crows gather in squawk along the tree line following the creek. There is an owl that comes around and hangs out in the tree over the workshop. She seemed to be fascinated by whatever Sunny was doing when she used to patrol around the garden in the evening. Sunny and Tommy’s final resting places are here, down by the creek. I don’t know how I could ever walk away. But if that guy was right and I got even close to what he said we could get I could retire right now. very conflicted