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Movie Re-Make Thread


Monte Carlo

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This is always a good one after a few beers.

 

Re-make your favourite classic movie - you can change the setting if you like, you need to name which modern actor takes which role and anything else you like. You can also name and shame the worst re-makes... for example Sly Stallone's Get Carter is horrible and everybody involved should be thoroughly ashamed of themselves (you too, Sir Michael Caine). So is Nic Cage's The Wicker Man (winder what his re-make of Bad Lieutenant will be like?).

 

We were talking about the Dirty Dozen and I got stuck. How many cool-as-a-cucumber, macho movie actors like Lee Marvin are there knocking about nowadays? Who would you get to reprise that role? I would take Russell Crowe personally, he has the right physicality and quiet arrogance.

 

Anyhow, I open the floor to the rabble.

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I'd like to reset Apocalypse Now, with the same team of mismatched soldiers, travelling by PT boat up the Cam to Cambridge in high summer to find an Army Colonel who's gone all effete and now has a teddy bear called Aloysius.

"It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"."

             -Elwood Blues

 

tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.

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I'd remake the Dark Crystal, make it faster paced. In fact, this is more of a re-edit than a remake.

 

I'd remake the Dark Crystal as a short film where the gelflings are destroyed quickly and efficiently by terminators.

"It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"."

             -Elwood Blues

 

tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.

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I dunno? Perhaps SOMEONE WHO WANTS THEIR ENEMIES ACTUALLY DEAD?

"It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"."

             -Elwood Blues

 

tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.

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Remake Day of the Jackal and let the Jackal actually manage to pop the head of the President.

 

Remake Saving Private Ryan, but instead of focusing on American heroics, focus on the British exploits starring the crew of Dad's Army.

The ending of the words is ALMSIVI.

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Fistful of Dollars

 

What would I remake:

 

-Instead of having hard looking men I think the movie should have good looking, clean shaven, pretty boys that are much easier on the eyes. The male cast of Twilight comes to mind.

 

-While Ennio Morricone

This post is not to be enjoyed, discussed, or referenced on company time.

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I'd remake the Dark Crystal, make it faster paced. In fact, this is more of a re-edit than a remake.

 

I'd remake the Dark Crystal as a short film where the gelflings are destroyed quickly and efficiently by terminators.

 

They're not remaking the Dark Crystal, but there is a sequel in pre-production...

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Fistful of Dollars

 

What would I remake:

 

-Instead of having hard looking men I think the movie should have good looking, clean shaven, pretty boys that are much easier on the eyes. The male cast of Twilight comes to mind.

 

-While Ennio Morricone

I'd say the answer to that question is kind of like the answer to "who's the sucker in this poker game?"*

 

*If you can't tell, it's you. ;)

village_idiot.gif

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Next you'll want a Yojimbo remake with Japanese schoolgirls.

 

Well.. that could actually work. A rundown school with two main "cliques" .. the lone transfer student who gets moved in and starts to manipulate the social events... :ermm:

 

 

A Fistful of Dollars was inspired by Yojimbo which was in turn inspired by a novel that was set in a prohibition era town in New Mexico...

 

So technically the version that Bruce Willis and Christopher Walken did that was inspired by Fistful of Dollars..... was closer to the original concept.. o:)

"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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Next you'll want a Yojimbo remake with Japanese schoolgirls.

 

Well.. that could actually work. A rundown school with two main "cliques" .. the lone transfer student who gets moved in and starts to manipulate the social events... :yucky:

 

 

A Fistful of Dollars was inspired by Yojimbo which was in turn inspired by a novel that was set in a prohibition era town in New Mexico...

 

So technically the version that Bruce Willis and Christopher Walken did that was inspired by Fistful of Dollars..... was closer to the original concept.. o:)

Maybe it was, but they didn't have Akira Kurosawa directing and starred Toshiro Mifune. Plus Fistful of Dollars reinvented the good gunfighter image from the cut clean law abiding (completely unrealistic) to the now more popular scruffy morally grey but good guy. That, and I can't see Christopher Walken without thinking of cowbells.

I'd say the answer to that question is kind of like the answer to "who's the sucker in this poker game?"*

 

*If you can't tell, it's you. ;)

village_idiot.gif

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That, and I can't see Christopher Walken without thinking of cowbells.

 

Me, I always remember some of his monologues as Gabriel in The Prophecy....

"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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I never saw the point in re-makes other than cashing in on and violating the name of a good movie :yucky:

 

Come to think of it, I can't remember a single re-make from top of my head that felt superior to it's original o:)

 

Maybe a few old sci-fi series (Blakes 7) would benefit from slightly higher production values (cardboard cut-outs and "wobble effects"), but that is about it.

“He who joyfully marches to music in rank and file has already earned my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, since for him the spinal cord would surely suffice.” - Albert Einstein

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Star Wars, as long as Lucas doesn't go anywhere near it.

In 7th grade, I teach the students how Chuck Norris took down the Roman Empire, so it is good that you are starting early on this curriculum.

 

R.I.P. KOTOR 2003-2008 KILLED BY THOSE GREEDY MONEY-HOARDING ************* AND THEIR *****-*** MMOS

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I never saw the point in re-makes other than cashing in on and violating the name of a good movie :yucky:

 

Come to think of it, I can't remember a single re-make from top of my head that felt superior to it's original o:)

 

Maybe a few old sci-fi series (Blakes 7) would benefit from slightly higher production values (cardboard cut-outs and "wobble effects"), but that is about it.

 

 

I think the following remakes are pretty good.

 

Alice in Wonderland (1951)

Ben Hur (1959)

The Blue Lagoon (1980)

The Bourne Identity (2002)

Brewster's Millions (1985)

Dirty Rotten Scoundrels (1988)

The Fly (1986)

The Great Gatsby (1974)

The Hills have Eyes (2006)

House of Wax (1953)

Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1978)

The Puppet Masters (1994)

Red Dragon (2002)

The Thing (1982)

Walking Tall (2004)

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Plus Fistful of Dollars reinvented the good gunfighter image from the cut clean law abiding (completely unrealistic) to the now more popular scruffy morally grey but good guy.

 

Arguably this change started two-three years prior to FISTFUL OF DOLLARS as Michael Carras' 'Savage Gun aka Tierra brutal introduced a different take on the American tradition often considered the prototype for the Spaghetti Western. A British-Spanish coproduction it featured a anti-hero gun-for-hire (played by Richard Basehart) and was the first to use Almeria, Spain as its location (where many Spaghetti Western films were made).

 

That said Fistful of Dollars clearly is what popularized a particular type of western in Europe and changed how the US saw and made westerns (although, even there people like Sam Pekinpah had began changing the western in the US famously fighting both US TV and film producers in the late 50s and early 60s)

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Plus Fistful of Dollars reinvented the good gunfighter image from the cut clean law abiding (completely unrealistic) to the now more popular scruffy morally grey but good guy.

 

Arguably this change started two-three years prior to FISTFUL OF DOLLARS as Michael Carras' 'Savage Gun aka Tierra brutal introduced a different take on the American tradition often considered the prototype for the Spaghetti Western. A British-Spanish coproduction it featured a anti-hero gun-for-hire (played by Richard Basehart) and was the first to use Almeria, Spain as its location (where many Spaghetti Western films were made).

 

That said Fistful of Dollars clearly is what popularized a particular type of western in Europe and changed how the US saw and made westerns (although, even there people like Sam Pekinpah had began changing the western in the US famously fighting both US TV and film producers in the late 50s and early 60s)

:lol::p I love how you know all these movie facts, you must be a movie trivia champ.

 

There is usually one that's the true innovator and one that popularizes the concept. While we are on the westerners subject, I wouldn't mind seeing a few remakes of obscure spaghetti western movies. 3:10 to Yuma was a pretty decent movie, we should get them to do Django.

Edited by Orogun01
I'd say the answer to that question is kind of like the answer to "who's the sucker in this poker game?"*

 

*If you can't tell, it's you. ;)

village_idiot.gif

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