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Funny Stuff: Revenge of the Funny


Amentep

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The words freedom and liberty, are diminishing the true meaning of the abstract concept they try to explain. The true nature of freedom is such, that the human mind is unable to comprehend it, so we make a cage and name it freedom in order to give a tangible meaning to what we dont understand, just as our ancestors made gods like Thor or Zeus to explain thunder.

 

-Teknoman2-

What? You thought it was a quote from some well known wise guy from the past?

 

Stupidity leads to willful ignorance - willful ignorance leads to hope - hope leads to sex - and that is how a new generation of fools is born!


We are hardcore role players... When we go to bed with a girl, we roll a D20 to see if we hit the target and a D6 to see how much penetration damage we did.

 

Modern democracy is: the sheep voting for which dog will be the shepherd's right hand.

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Here's how credit cards work:

Quote

Imagine stumbling into a fairy ring that belongs to the fairy mafia. An enchanting being appears, smile wide enough to reveal rows of sharp and glistening teeth, and it remarks, "Why, traveler, you look positively destitute! I have just the thing!"

It turns its palms up, revealing fistfuls of gold coins. Gold coins falling to the moss below. Gold coins all around you.

"Borrow whatever you'd like! Just bring it back by the next full moon, alright, my sweet?"

That's when you notice its necklace of withered human fingers.

You take a handful of gold coins, because you really do need the money. As long as you pay the strange creature back before the next full moon, nothing bad will come of it.

Now, obviously the fairy is trying to trick you. You know that! But you're confident you can outwit it. You borrow what you need, and you return to that magical forest place before the moon fills. All is well. Better than well! The fairy grows fond of you , leaving you larger and larger piles of gold to borrow.

Other fairies begin to make offerings to you as you walk the woods.

One month, life is particularly cruel to you. You can't pay back the gold you borrowed.

On the night of the full moon, the being appears. "Don't worry, my sweet. I am merciful. Just give me what you have today, and pay the rest by next moon." It strokes its gruesome necklace.

"I'm sorry," you say. "I'll earn the money. I'll pay back the debt!"

"Don't worry at all, precious darling! All in due time. Things have a way of working themselves out." And then, before disappearing in a puff of smoke, whispered under its breath: "that's the first finger."

The fairy keeps leaving you bigger piles of gold. The temptation grows stronger. Eventually you come think of it as *your* gold.

You borrow too much sometimes and can't pay it back.  "Two fingers," it whispers without sound. Then three. It keeps letting you take more money.

One day, you realise that regardless of whether you make good on your debts, you can't stop borrowing more gold. Not only because you've built your life around it, but also because if you ever stopped borrowing it would make the fairies very angry. Not just this one. All of them.

You look around you at the world. Your fellow villagers have all fallen under the sway of the fairies.

Borrowed fairy gold runs your whole town. People only do business with others if they are known to be in favour of the fairies. Every day, more hands with missing fingers.

The savvy villager knows just what to do: borrow small amounts of gold regularly, to attract the attention and good graces of the fairies, and always repay it in full before the next moon, knowing it is not their gold. Get charmed and keep their fingers.

Few villagers are savvy.

Anyways, "sinister temptations from the fairy mafia, who will love you dearly if you play the game right" is the framework that helps me make my beset credit decisions. 

Maybe it will be helpful to someone else out there too....

 

Edited by Raithe
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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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i see these memes with Arroyo 

 

1) is it our Fallout Arroyo?

2) do they really change those texts there so often or is it photoshop?

I'm the enemy, 'cause I like to think, I like to read. I'm into freedom of speech, and freedom of choice. I'm the kinda guy that likes to sit in a greasy spoon and wonder, "Gee, should I have the T-bone steak or the jumbo rack of barbecue ribs with the side-order of gravy fries?" I want high cholesterol! I wanna eat bacon, and butter, and buckets of cheese, okay?! I wanna smoke a Cuban cigar the size of Cincinnati in the non-smoking section! I wanna run naked through the street, with green Jell-O all over my body, reading Playboy magazine. Why? Because I suddenly may feel the need to, okay, pal? I've SEEN the future. Do you know what it is? It's a 47-year-old virgin sitting around in his beige pajamas, drinking a banana-broccoli shake, singing "I'm an Oscar Meyer Wiene"

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1 hour ago, Chilloutman said:

i see these memes with Arroyo 

 

1) is it our Fallout Arroyo?

2) do they really change those texts there so often or is it photoshop?

You beat me to it... was about to ask if there is some kind of original Arroyo meme that people keep copying/building on.

“He who joyfully marches to music in rank and file has already earned my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, since for him the spinal cord would surely suffice.” - Albert Einstein
 

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I think they change the sign daily, is a restaurant in Austin

Why has elegance found so little following? Elegance has the disadvantage that hard work is needed to achieve it and a good education to appreciate it. - Edsger Wybe Dijkstra

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I got jacuzzi and yakuza mixed up Now I’m in hot water with the Japanese mafia

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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