(Disclaimer) Did not play the games, but did watch a playthrough of both.
I think the gameplay/AI is even worse in the second. As for the golf club scene, in and of itself it's not that big of deal. The bigger fault is how the rest of the story handles it, how the rest of the characters don't really matter and how nonsensical the story gets by the end of it. Had the follow through story been better people would not have minded it so much. The whole games feels like a cheep effort to play on people feelings.
People are also pissed that the trailers baited them in to thinking that Joel would be a much larger part of the story.
As for Abby being buff I don't mind it, though her build looks very odd. I don't think they modeled her correctly, but oh well. The thing I find less credible is how clean shaven everyone is at all points of the game (face, armpits, etc.), I don't think people would pay that much attention in an apocalypse.
What I continue to find funny is how ok people in the west are with graphic violence, but any intimacy and sex scenes immediately draw outrage.