theslug

So something odd happened today and it's made me extremely curious and quite honestly confuzzled beyond belief. Apparently my mom had her nails done by someone in my accounting class who claims to know who I am; which is absolutely freaking ridiculous. Number 1, I'm 1 person of about 70 other classmates. Number 2, the only people I socialize with is my assigned group and even then I couldn't name two member's names off the top of my head. And number 3, the only Asian girl I've met from that class was at a accounting social event a month and a half ago and the name, an extremely unique one, did not ring any bells. Which even if it did, how the hell would she remember me? It's not like I'm particularly interesting or left any kind of impression. But what blows my mind is I looked her name up in the class and she is definitely there. So now it's just a matter of like do I have a stalker and secondly how do I go about getting laid by said hot asian chick stalker? I'm just not sure walsausages can seal this deal. I know I'm going to ruminate on this for like the next week and a half. Ruining my entire freakin spring break damnit.

I started the final stages of my accounting project today. All I know is my accounting partner friend guy man dude bro is awesome. If I didn't have him to bounce my insanely crappy answers off of I would most certainly probably almost fail this crap. I just finished the second stage and sent him what I got and I'm just awaiting a response to see what he has. For the most part it's not a matter of concept or application it's just my work is plagued with errors that range from stupid transposition, misreading, or in some cases forgetting to post an entry to another journal or ledger. Luckily I've been listening to this about non stop: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LoY37T_nv5U I have no idea what she is saying but I adore her voice and love the song. I...I think I'm in love. :3 Today I also hung out with my friend trying to help him set up his computer for internets but found out his mac is like 8 years old. It was kind of hillarious. His computer had a hard drive of 6 gigs. My ipod stores more than that. So then we went to Fry's to try and find him a computer but he doesn't know if he wants a pc or a mac and whether he wants a laptop or desktop. Then we went to the mall with another friend and then basically nothing became of it. It's also starting to get warmer. The last few days have been absolutely beautiful but things can only go downhill from here. It's going to be awesome when it hits like 100 during the tail end of school and then I can get into my toasty 500 degree oven car and within 15 seconds have my back drenched in sweat. That's always a good look. It's like 120 degrees 0 humidity and then you step out of your car and everyone is like jesus did that guy just get raped by a dolphin? Yeah I hate my life. Damn you hyperhydrosis, damn you.

In my experience there's only one way this can end well. When he's sleeping you punch him in the groin. It's the only way, trust me. He'll understand you're the alpha male. He will have no choice but to submit.

ROfl I was outraged by this too. I was just like, ugh what is that guy doing...whoa wh- WAIT what are you doing!?!? what noooooo and then it was too late :'(

So I think something happened at work. I logged into the online class system today and was immediately hit with a pop up of a job opening for my exact same position. There's basically only two scenarios that can explain this: the other girl quit or I'm getting fired. I couldn't imagine them hiring another person on because they basically only give me busy work as it is now. Summer school is coming up but it's going to be nowhere near what it was like at the start of the current semester and me and the other student worker were able to get through that relatively fine on our own so extra man power isn't needed. I mean I'd welcome the opportunity to get laid off because I'm going to be quitting once this semester ends anyways and it would free up so much time to get school stuff done but at the same time I'm scared they think I did something wrong, which as far as I know, I haven't done anything to warrant a pink slip. I suppose I'll find out tomorrow what the deal is. Perhaps I'll also give them my "two weeks" which is actually more like a month+ but I'm scared. :'(

I'm sorry to hear of your distress GD but won't the settlement provide enough funds for your medical, attorney and living expenses? I know (I think) you don't have a job but it's like if you get half a million out of it (sounds pretty reasonable to me, my friends sister got near 1 mill) and you make sure to negotiate with the hospital that should be enough to take you through this and next year pretty easy. I suggest you get a float tank with all that money. I'm going to get one eventually. They have been scientifically linked with decreasing or completely getting rid of depression. Plus it's all natural and really awesome and people can think your a weird hermit man when they come over and they ask what that giant box is. Or just get a really nice jacuzzi and claim it for medical expenses on your taxes next year. Just a friendly future tax accountant slug tip.

You might want to strangle me to death one day. We had a person from the IRS come to our class today to present and I think I want to be a revenue agent. I mean she had a bunch of stories and like one time she audited some chick who was a professional whore and also converted her home into a brothel with male prostitutes. How could I walk away from something like that? Plus she almost exclusively works solo which is awesome for me becuase it's an introverts paradise and the pay schedule/benefits/40 hour week is quite glorious not to mention you don't need a CPA. But who knows, I'll have to take a few tax classes to know what I'm getting into. But something that is kind of funny is that the IRS doesn't care what the hell you do, be it highly illegal or not, just as long as you pay your taxes and get it right. Nearly all her stories including the prostitute weren't charged unless they committed fraud or some other act involving taxes. Pretty amazing stuff.

Today was a wonderful day! I went to work which is always a blast. Then I got home and as I was exiting my vehicle the door handle broke off. And I don't mean broke off like last time when I was able to jury rig it by removing the broken plastic and what not, nope entire thing clear off with just a hook of steel left. Luckily I figured out I could just use my key ring to leverage it open. HI-larious. Thanks God. And then to top things off, I walk in the door and what do I find? Well, it's ravioli monday which means various cans of tomatoes and premade sauce strewn together served over store bought raviolis, not to mention I get to hear how it's been homemade and made from scratch. My favorite. Yum. I never get tired of this stuff even if we've had it 5 consecutive monday's in a row and each time the majority of it sits in the refrigerator until I throw it away mid way through the week. There's about 5 hours left in the day for me before I head to sleepy time. I can only imagine what other miracles can happen today. Maybe my computer will catch fire and explode causing shards of aluminum to fly into my junk. I cannot think of any other way to end the night. It just wouldn't be right to stop the good times coming. Maybe that's asking for too much though, perhaps a stroke or hard drive failure would be more probable. I mean those aren't too much to ask for right, God? Good talk. @Gorgon: How dare you sir. The Japanese should be respected by all. Where would the world get our wonderfully drawn delicious cake from? I ask you that, friend, where?!?! It's not just that either. They have plenty of other things too that don't involve young girls and pantsu, like samurais or ninjas or something. I mean not as cool as the former but they are legitimate I suppose.

Today I did a whole lot of nothing. Much like yesterday. I got my grade back for my accounting exam. Another crappy grade (78) even though I thought I did really good. Also had my finance exam which sucked really hardcore becuase it was really tough and I know I got a bunch of stuff wrong. To make it worse I was looking through my pile of school stuff on my desktop to see what I had to do and double clicked something I didn't recognize. Oh hey its a practice exam with pretty much the exact same questions on the test with solutions and how to get those answers. Amazing. I'm angry. Luckily I believe he allows you to go back to questions you missed and rework them for extra credit. I also got my haircut which is an activity I really enjoy to be honest. I love the feel of hair being cut and my head being man handled by a woman. Plus I always wait so long that I end up looking like a new and much improved person. Tomorrow I go to work and the cycle beings a new. However, next week is spring break at my university so I get 3 whole consecutive days during the week off. It's going to be amazing. Except for the fact that I'll be starting and finishing a huge accounting project, doing regular weekly assignments for my other two classes, and doing a research project for my management class as well as a project for my other accounting class. Awesome-o.

Maybe it's a regional thing but Ongbak was mildly popular on the west coast and it even had advertising becuase I can remember them making like a second movie or something with the same guy and it was like *From the creators of Ongbak* and like all this action stuff and then him running away from a gun on a 4 wheeler inside of an empty high rise and he does the run up and flip thing against a large glass wall window and the dude on the ATV oblivious goes right through it most likely leading to his stupendously dumb death. And Ongbak is way over rated imo. Sure the fighting was pretty good but it offered nothing else really. Once you've seen a Jet Li movie you've pretty much seen them all. Maybe that's a little unfair since he does some really horrible stuff but Kiss of the dragon was pretty awesome when I was 14.

I wonder what would happen if Tigraines and Shyrke met.....I would assume their meeting would cause a massive surge in the cosmic energies leading to a profound change in the electromagnetic spectrum which in turn allows me to get laid....or perhaps I should just stick to Walsausages. Through Walsausages, even the impossibly improbable becomes slightly attainable. Sounds like a great slogan for Wals's friend's new company.

ROfl I thought it was a tranny cammy as well. Edit: Enoch, it sounds like you need an assistant.

You should learn how to blow someone off better. Maybe learn how to say "no English" with a french accent and shrug your shoulders. Yeah I know but I'm way too timid socially and kind of a push over but I am getting better. The thing was he just caught me off guard. I was in my usual aloof, withdrawn state when he popped up. Unfortunately it was like two seconds after that I realized I could have just said I was getting a book from my car or something and had to return to class. But w/e, the guy was harmless and if worse came to worse I could have struck him in the windpipe then tried to gouge his eyes out. Or drive into oncoming traffic. There's always that option. I think I'm going to choose a different parking space from now on. I used to park in a plaza across the street but after a semester and a half I finally got a little flyer thing that warns of being towed away so I just followed what everyone else does and park throughout the streets nearby.

Probably the third scariest and second dumbest thing ever in my life happened to me today. So I've just completed my accounting exam and I'm walking from school to my car, which since my school has horrible parking in this particular section is located in front of some ghetto slum apartments about 3 blocks away. So I'm strolling thinking everything is grand, I'm pretty sure I did well on the test, when I hear a faint yelling gesture of "Hey you!!?!?" behind me. I continue walking, who the hell would want anything to do with me right? Wrong, dead shiv in the abdomen bleeding to death in the ghetto wrong. I eventually turn around and see a very intimidating and strange looking black man heading towards me. He's wearing a black leather jacket that isn't zipped up and lacks a shirt underneath, so it's just bare chest and near six pack abs. I immediately regret stopping. As soon as he catches up to me he introduces himself and goes into an elaborate story about how his wife is 6 months pregnant and how she was in the hospital but everything fine but now he has to get back home or something. I'm scared right now and he can tell. He keeps reassuring me that he's legit and shows me his license. I explain to him that I can't take him to his destination becuase I don't live out that direction (when in reality I do) but he really presses it and I inevitably, against all reason and logic let him in my car. Well I suppose some logic went into it. Since he wasn't wearing a shirt or any loose fitting clothing I could tell he was unarmed unless it was a knife which would have to be pretty small to be concealed. Not to mention he was a pretty small guy. I'm only 5'8 but he might have been 5'6 and about 20 - 30 pounds lighter than me. Once I got in the car I could tell exactly what was up. The guy was obviously a drug addict. I agreed to drop him off about 5 minutes away in an area I knew was open and crowded and what not but he kept asking for money for a fare. Luckily I only had 3 dollars in cash on me and let him out. But I haven't even gotten to the scary part yet. While I'm driving, he's asking me about how much tail I'm pulling down and then he lets out an F the police even though there's none around and then he reminds me that he needs money for a fare and then he's like "Yeah man you gotta get the psy dawg....yeah.....man when I was 15 I got raped by 9 girls. They ran a train on me." And I laughed becuase it was like yeah lol....and he's like "man different time back then without all this suing and stuff......it hurt....." and that's when I was worried I might get stabbed becuase I guess he got like rape raped and not just like 9 girls performing sexual acts on him in a friendly type way. I basically laughed in his face about some child hood trauma he went through. But in the end I'm fine, my car smells a little funny and I'm out 3 dollars and some loose change. But lesson learned.

I have a ton of project/exam stuff coming up so I decided I'd ask for a half day on Friday too! Best friends <3

Watching the first episode now. The part where the large imposing black man gingerly wipes a smudge off a young white boys face in an awkwardly long and silent moment was quite overtly homosexual in my opinion. And that scares me. Other than that it seems like it could have potential but I'm not even a quarter way through the ep yet so that could change. I'll let you guys know how to goes and make sure to report on any man rape that could occur which through my intensive statistical analysis I'm calculating at least a 37% chance.

Your friend should check out score.org. They are a pretty neat not for profit organization that helps small businesses and start ups. They have everything from the entire layout of a Business Plan and how to do it to all sorts of other helpful little hints and tips. I'm not sure if they have anything in the UK but you can also do some face to face consulting and what not.

I don't know who this dominic grieve fellow is Wals but he sure makes me sound damn smart and I like it. I'm proud of you wals.

No offense Calax but I think if I would have actually wrote my story I would have crushed your frail skull within the palm of my hand. Well probably not becuase I would have never fit my story into the character limit, have anything to do with kotor 2 and it would have gotten much too violent and what not. But I digress. You can't beat old republic soldier vietnam style flash backs of him in the jungles murdering a dude from behind out of the bushes with a hand fashioned blade, while simultaneously muffling his screams with his other hand. And then like they crash land on this planet and there are raptors and like there's also medical mystery afoot so it's like crazy old guy soldier dude mixed with House M.D. and there was also going to be a wise cracking robotic cat. I have no idea where the story was going to end up and I wasn't too sure on how I was going to implement anything so it was pretty much a lost cause. I was also going to donate my prize to wals. That was my only real motivation.

I would certainly rather workout at home but spending like a grand on a squat rack and bench isn't all that appealing to me especially since I'd lose a lot of extremely convenient and helpful alternative exercises. And also wtf at crashgirl spending $100 a month? I spent 300 for a 2 year contract that allows me to go to like 80% of the thousands of gyms they have around the world.

Awesome. I know a lot of folks who drop 20-30 pounds just by cutting out soda. I recommend a natural juice drink. It has enough sugar to get you going, but it's real fruit sugar so it is way better for your health. I drink a Crystal Geyser Juice Squeeze almost every day at work, they are very good. Wow. I hate you Hurl. I only get juice squeezes like once every 5 or 6 months when I get my mom to go to Trader Joes and I usually end up hoarding them and drinking like 2 cases within 3 or 4 days because they are so delicious and wonderful. What I'd do for a nice frigid cold Wild Berry. :'( Probably my favorite drink ever created besides original snapple.

Yeah I go to 24 hour fitness and before that was a large local gym and they didn't have anything like that either. Well the local gym at the front desk you could ask for one and if the person was nice enough they'd fork one over. It's not that I don't understand the concept, I used to wrestle, so I definitely know the fear of getting ring worm or some other infection from some dudes groinal sweat on the beck of your neck but this is like a how dare you type thing. I'm a man and as such I can do whatever I damn please. But seriously I guess it's more of a personal wtf I don't care becuase I'm naive and don't expect the homeless to be using the equipment. You don't even have to worry about any of that stuff as long the place is well maintained, ie they get off their fat asses and wipe down all the machines with a cleaning solution once a day when things aren't busy. Not to mention a towel isn't going to do crap. It absorbs sweat, which isn't the same as preventing the spread of infectious disease.

I was pretty disappointed with the ending and it just generally left a bad taste in my mouth. I obviously have the same complaints as everyone else, Starbuck turning into nothingness, dropping technology, and everything was god or something I don't even know but it was just like not that great. Much like grom I've been dissatisfied by the last couple of seasons and this didn't change anything. It felt like BSG, in a bad way. And the japanese robotic love doll and all that non sense at the end felt out of place and stupid. They could have started a utopia will all that technology. At the base of all war and hatred and stuff is the scarcity of resources. No one would have to starve or die of influenza and they could genetically engineer a race of cat humanoids who do our bidding instead of robots. Stupid robots.

Where can I read this fan fic?

The lady at the front desk at the gym I go to had the audacity to ask me to bring a freakin towel with me next time. Excuse me? Excuse me *****? I will crush your freakin face if you ever, ever disgrace me like that ever again. All my towels are extra starchy, extra, extra starchy. :'( But seriously it's like what the hell? I mean I'm a sweaty man, a very sweaty man but it's not like I get on the bench with my shirt soaked through. Not to mention its just one more thing I need to bring. The old gym I used to go to it's like I brought my membership card with me and that was it. This one its like membership card, license, towel, liquid condoms. I'm not going to the god damn beach damnit I don't want to have to carry all this crap with me. Pisses me off. In other news I finished and compared my project with my accounting group friend and it seems like I could pull out of this one real nice like. Now all I need to do is jump ahead in two of my other classes and prepare for a few exams. Yaaay.