Donating Two Memorial Stones to the Community

[SqueakyCat]

Indira,  I think the Devs gave everyone until the end of the month so the 19th is fine.   Just a reminder -- they cannot be more than 200 characters in length and they need a title as well which can be around 40 characters I believe.  Have fun!

 

I wish I had done this months ago because I think at least a few more people would have considered donating to the community as well. 

 

I see what you did there, Panda.  You found a way to completely avoid the curse.  Smooth, very smooth. 

[IndiraLightfoot]

SqueakyCat: Then, the 19th, it is.

 

Silent Winter: Thank you for that beautiful poem! However, like SqueakyCat just reminded us, it needs to be pretty short, especially if you include spaces. My poem was pretty lengthy vis-à-vis the scope requirements. So if you can, boil it down even further without watering it down, as it were!

 

Hassat Hunter: In keeping can be a poem that fits a standard adventure RPG setting, anything along those lines, suffices! I'm just hoping to avoid blatant anachronisms and jokes and such that come across as perhaps too much here and now. All poems submitted so far that meet the requirements are still in the running to become a text on one coveted Memorial Stone.

[IndiraLightfoot]

I just learnt it the hard way how short those 200 characters are. I had to truncate mine a bit at the beginning to get everything in.

So, yes, they do count spaces and returns, so use Word or a similar program to count the characters before submitting. It's a challenge, but it's a fun and most doable one!

[Nonek]

A memorial to the fallen of the Broken Stone War.

 

Fiery the Adra fell, and the deep thunder of war drums rolled.

From these shores, the indignant burning blood of our youth poured.

And souls cried aloud as they fled into the dark night.

Edited March 15, 2014 by Nonek

[IndiraLightfoot]

I've tried to compile all the poems so far that are in the running for the second Memorial Stone. However, quite a few of them are still too long. It turns out that 185 characters, including spaces and something like 8 returns, is the real limit. Also, the title of the poem, if any, should be like 40 characters, tops. So, wrap your masterpieces in shrink wrap, folks!

A few more poems above would definitely be candidates in this thread if they didn't include "dyslexic" or "pantaloons".

 

Here lied

Ray

Patrick

Greg

dying a long painful death, he has been resurrected recently by Obsidian stone.

May he prosper in unlife.

 

 

Valeska the Actress

 

There was no role she could not play.

So natural in talent,

so powerful in conviction.

So good in fact was she, that we

are not entirely sure she's deceased.

 

 

- Lart the Liar -

 

Here lies the liar

Who said he was dead

We took him to the graveyard

And made it truth instead

 

 

Here lies David the Brave
Took on too much
and was sent to his grave
He fought with force of will
and shall evermore lay still
Courage is no substitute for skill
 

 

 

As thy gaze rests upon this cold slab of stone,

This life can make one chilled and weary to the bone,

My tale was of pure devotion – of love and of fate,

This girl laid gently below – My precious wife Kate,

 

Through her I found passion,

Through her I found lust,

Through her I found a mate,

One who will keep me straight,

 

Her smile is so kind,

Her body and charm radiate,

Of course I mean Sarah,

Best friend of my Kate,

 

 

Name: He Who Would Not Die

 

Inscription:

A single life was not enough,

But a single grave

Is all he got.

 

 

 

Who would dream to rebuild

A world, forgotten

Throw a plea into the ether?

 

They replied

With gold, with silver and with bronze

Hungry, and with faith

 

And so the pillars were built

Crafted by hands, trembling

Ears shielded from the tumult

 

Of gold, silver and bronze

 

But they are remembered, here,

souls all raucous

Better than dust

 

 

No Rest For The Wicked

 

Laid to rest,

Revived by the best,

Slaughtered adventurers by the hundreds,

Then died from a sunset.

Read this tomb twice,

And he shall again rise.

 

 

 

 

Higani and Ruto,

that bonded pair.

Ever together,

would ever dare.

To challenge the dark,

and bring the light.

To settle the wrongs,

with arrow's flight,

or nature's claw,

and make to pay,

the enemies,

of Echo Bay.

When at last,

he gave his all,

dear faithful Ruto,

in battle did fall,

and with him,

Higani's last breath,

for neither could live,

with the other's death.

So here interred,

the two will sleep,

the last embrace,

beneath the deep.

 

(...Or I guess Echo Bay could be replaced by Defiance Bay but i figured a ranger would go for the smaller place to the north.)

 

Edit: Had to go out for food so rushed the ending - might sound better with:

So here interred,

the two will sleep,

in last embrace,

each other keep.

 

 

A memorial to the fallen of the Broken Stone War.

 

Fiery the Adra fell, and the deep thunder of war drums rolled.

From these shores, the indignant burning blood of our youth poured.

And souls cried aloud as they fled into the dark night.

[Silent Winter]

Well, I don't work well under limits

But I can understand the need to keep them short.

The following is the short version - 195 characters (including spaces) plus 5 line-breaks

Moved the names to the title (and shortened Higani to Gani to save space ).

 

---

 

Here lie Gani and Ruto, a bonded pair

 

With arrow’s flight and nature's claw

They gave the fight ‘til last did fall

Ruto, and Gani's last breath

for none could live with the other's death

Here the two will sleep

Forevermore each other keep

[Silent Winter]

OR a simpler, more headstone-esque one:

 

Here lie Gani and Ruto, a bonded pair

 

With arrow’s flight and claw did they

defend the folk of Echo Bay

 

OR, a sillier one:

 

Here lie Gani and Ruto, a bonded pair

 

When pushed too far did Ruto quit,

and his bonded ranger he bit.

The resulting fight was twice as draining

and now they're dead...so much for obedience training.

[ItinerantNomad]

So this is incomplete because its meant to be in Aedryan (a la Beowulf), but so far what I've got is meant to be used as a tombstone or memorial near Godhammer Citadel or the Readceras area.

 

The character count is 157 for the message and 21 for the Title. It is meant to be commentary on St. Waidwen's death.

 

The Death of Religion (21)

 

A death expected in its wrath (30)

Though what was unexpected still (32)

Was this destruction’s path (27)

The impious ally filled death’s till (36)

More than the enemy’s bomb hath. (32)

Edited March 16, 2014 by ItinerantNomad

[Silent Winter]

So this is incomplete because its meant to be in Aedryan (a la Beowulf), but so far what I've got is meant to be used as a tombstone or memorial near Godhammer Citadel or the Readceras area.

 

The character count is 157 for the message and 21 for the Title. It is meant to be commentary on St. Waidwen's death.

 

The Death of Religion (21)

 

A death expected in its wrath (30)

Though what was unexpected still (32)

Was this destruction’s path (27)

The impious ally filled death’s till (36)

More than the enemy’s bomb hath. (32)

Nice - though if it gets translated into Aedryan, it may no longer ryhme (or even scan depending on the sentence structure).  Though it should still be in the character limit (unless Aedryan likes really long vocaubulary, like Entish or something)

Translating the meaning of a poem is easier than translating the poetry of it.

Not sure if they've said where the memorial stones will be (all in the same place or sprread around?)

 

Edit: Deja Vu - maybe I'm just tired this morning but have we had this conversation about translating poetry before?

Edited March 17, 2014 by Silent Winter

[Silent Winter]

Another silly one:

Here lies Hamsh the Orlan Druid

 

If only he hadn't been shapeshifted when he died,

Were-bears don't make for cheap coffins.

[JFSOCC]

it looks to me like ItenerantNomad wants it more than anyone else.

[Lephys]

I've been trying to come up with something decent for about a week now. This is all I've managed:

 

 

Ilandel the Skyweaver

 

From afar came an army

To deliver our fall

From the wind came a shiver

Acquiescing his call

 

And preempting their parcel

He awarded them death

Forging crystalline weapons

From their traitorous breath.

[IndiraLightfoot]

Just a heads up: There are exactly 24 hours till the time is up and another fellow forum member gets selected as a Memorial Stone poet. Good luck!

[khalil]

I've got some back on the first page, and I'd like to enter those for the second stone too.

[IndiraLightfoot]

Sure, Khalil!

These two get to be entries then. The others were too blatant in their anachronism, so to speak.

 

 

Here lies The Chosen One.
No-one knows who chose him, or what they chose for.
Now here he lies forevermore.

Here lies Adahn.
Try coming back from this.
*On further inspection, the soil around this grave appears disturbed, as though something had been recently unearthed, or somehow managed to unearth itself.*
 

[khalil]

Aww. I felt the vampire one was fitting.

I was trying to go for the sort of stuff you found on gravestones in Arcanum: random goofy jokes.

Here's a few more:

 

Here lies Magus the Eternal

He has a mouth, but screaming won't do him any good.

 

Here lies lay lies Azkaban the Lich King

If out, please leave a message with Ms. Wittaker next door.

 

Here lies Mr. Hong

Apparently opening a sushi bar on Dagon Street during the winter solstice under the full moon in the middle of a lunar eclipse was not one of his better ideas.

 

Here lies Terrance the Astrologer

Told to marry a Leo with the Ebola Virus

 

Here lies Timmy, age 7

The astrologer told us Timmy would have a long and happy life.

It would appear the stars were left.

Edited March 18, 2014 by khalil

[Valsuelm]

If we have to re-enter, then

 

I've got some back on the first page, and I'd like to enter those for the second stone too.

 

If we have to re-enter then I resubmit my earlier submission as well.

Also, in regards to criteria, my two cents: whoever wins, I'd like to see some references to some of the games that inspired this game in our PoE graveyard(s), such as what I submitted or better. I'm hoping that if not through this contest, someone submits some memorial stones that gives a nod to those that came before. What better use of a memorial stone than to memorialize those that came before?

[khalil]

That was the reason I went for the PST refrence in one of mine. (Adahn was a fake name you could use.)

Actually, here's another one:

 

The Grave of the Nameless Soldier

(choose one of these)

Poor berk messed with the wrong power.

OR

His love for her burned as bright as the flames that killed him.

OR

Justice finally caught up.

OR

The shadows that surrounded him were but reflections of those in his heart.

 

and here's another

Vhailor

He was the best Mercykiller(replace with officer, if the original would create legal trouble) we've had since Javert. His disappearance is a loss not just to the Bread Crimes Division, but to the planes(universe or planet if planes creates legal trouble) as a whole.

Edited March 18, 2014 by khalil

[JFSOCC]

Oh, I didn't get that I should change the name I figured you could substitute any name with the same cadence

 

I liked ItenerantNomad's submission too.

Edited March 18, 2014 by JFSOCC

[Pandamaniac]

Just a heads up: There are exactly 24 hours till the time is up and another fellow forum member gets selected as a Memorial Stone poet. Good luck!

I have been thinking: Why not curse that person to choose the third?    

[khalil]

I think we should have whoever is the most qualified chose the third one.

Given that I've written a novel (Dunces and Dragons! (No relation to the Spongebob episode)! Buy it now! Available wherever books are sold, as long as said books are being sold on Amazon!), that'd probably be me.

Don't worry, I won't be so crass as to choose my entry.

You can trust me.

Really.

Edited March 18, 2014 by khalil

[IndiraLightfoot]

I have been thinking: Why not curse that person to choose the third?    

 

Pandamaniac: I'll be happy to oblige, just confirm that you want me to do so.

 

All: It's less than 12 hours to go, and I just want to clarify something:

People's contributions don't need to get below the required number of characters at this point.  You'll get a brief window, where you get to adjust it to the needed length (like I did).

[IndiraLightfoot]

The time is now officially up!

There were plenty of brilliant lyrics on display here, so I had to give this choice quite some thought. After careful consideration, I’ve decided to pick a clever and solemn poem that really captures our sense of community here, especially among the PE backers. Although we all are different and diverse, we share this faith in the promise and potential of Pillars of Eternity. I’m referring to Monte Carlo’s Who Would Dream. In addition, his poem manages to rest on the pillars themselves, as it were, summarising what the setting and the game itself is all about. Monte’s lyrics will have to be shortened a bit, just like mine had to be, but I really do hope this last part makes it after the cut:

“souls all raucous

Better than dust”

It’s very beautiful and it suits the theme of souls in PE quite well.

Also, if Pandamaniac stands by his wish, this means that Monte Carlo may be the one who gets to pick the contributor of the third Memorial Stone, but it remains speculation until we have that confirmed. Thank you, all contributors! It’s been a lovely read-through. J

[SqueakyCat]

Thanks Indira.  Perfect choice. 

 

Congratulations, Monte.  It seems we've come full-circle.

 

I'll send you a PM after I try copying it into the survey to let you know how much editing will be necessary.

 

Thanks to everyone who contributed ideas and to Indira for tackling the 'curse' with enthusiasm. 

[Monte Carlo]

I'd like to thank my agent and God.