Quarter Life Qrysis: A Ground-Floor Dilemma

[Pop]

I am having a quarter-life qrysis. Essentially I am burned out on my current liberal arts masters' track. With a thesis looming some years into the future and most of my classmates already far more qualified and employed than I am, I'm discovering the ambivalence I always sort of had towards what I was doing. I think I'm done with this racket. It's not going to make me happy.

 

So having my QLQ, as I am, I'm trying to think of what I want to do, what I've always dreamed of doing, and it turns out that's work on games. I'm not a total moron re: the game industry so I'm not some greenhorn who thinks he can market himself as a writer or designer (lol). Were I to even aspire to a design position it would be on the back of a tangible skill, namely programming or art, and a Justin Cherry I am not. I'm not aware of the full scope of possible jobs - one option might be to sign on somewhere in a QA capacity and work my way up into a producer track from there? - but programming seems to be the most overall useful thing.

 

The thing is, I have trouble with math. While it's true that logic (which is different in some ways with math) underpins most programming, in modern game programming dealing with engines and visuals, an in-depth familiarity with physics is necessary, and therefore an in-depth knowledge of calculus. I've done fine in College Algebra (the real stuff, not "math for liberal arts majors") when I've studied hard, but CS degrees and the like require extensive calculus and linear algebra. I don't know if I lack the capacity for higher-level math processing or if my fear of math is causing paralysis. If I went back to undergrad, swallowed my pride, and made extensive use of math tutors I might take to it, I don't know. I don't know if it's relevant but I have a pretty solid grasp of the statistics and methods courses I've taken in my current / soon-to-be-ex discipline (public administration).

 

The thing is, I've done a little bit of low-level coding myself. I got about halfway through a BG2 CNPC mod and I enjoyed the experience, but it was all quite basic scripting - placing the CNPC at a certain map coordinate, setting triggers, and building dialogue trees, such as this intra-party dialogue I added:

CHAIN

IF ~InParty("jaheira")

InParty ("BJ#Auden")

See("jaheira")

!StateCheck("BJ#Auden",CD_STATE_NOTVALID)

!StateCheck("jaheira",CD_STATE_NOTVALID)

Global("BJ#JaheiraGab","GLOBAL",1)~

THEN BJAHEIR AudJahB1-1

~It appears that life on the road suits you, Auden.~

== BBJ#Aude

~It does, I think. It has been over a year since I left my homeland. One learns to live simply - it helps that I carry so few accoutrements of the adventurer's life.~

== BJAHEIR

~I imagine so. The simple life is often the better, I think. But traveling with CHARNAME, simplicity is impossible.~

== BBJ#Aude

~It musn't be so bad, if you're still here.~

== BJAHEIR

~Well now, I have old promises to live up to... I imagine you know a great deal about keeping to one's oaths.~

== BBJ#Aude

~If I have obligations to fulfill it it because I have chosen them. Those who break their promises lose control over themselves.~

== BJAHEIR

~Hmph. Better to break your word than do worse in keeping it. If you seek to ingratiate yourself to me, you can start by keeping watch at next camp. It is your turn to do so.~

== BBJ#Aude

~I look forward to it.~

DO ~IncrementGlobal("BJ#JaheiraGab","GLOBAL",1)~

EXIT

 

I had a lot of fun with this, and the logic of it made a lot of sense to me, though the lack of tutorials for that particular set of tools (and the overt creepiness of the modding community) made me give it up. I want to do that sort of thing again, and I'm looking forward to Project: Eternity allowing me to revisit that sort of mod work. But fun as it is, I don't think this sort of thing is greatly applicable to current industry work. Getting a job requires much more.

 

I guess my question is: Given my doubts about my ability to naturally handle physics and calculus with ease, am I better off diverting my attention to things like web development and the like (which would also, it should be said, require less and cheaper schooling), which are more overtly logic-based, and save my game aspirations for low-level modding of games other people make? Or is there some career path within the gaming industry that I could work towards that doesn't require that intense level of math? Can I learn to program and be employed and work on games without having to deal with hit detection and ragdolls and all that? Or should I do something else and partake in welterweight fanmod projects built on foundations laid by the pros? Am I hopelessly confused about what programming actually is??

 

Help me, Obsidian forums!

Edited February 25, 2013 by Pop

[Azrayel]

As an aspiring liberal arts **** of the future, iDon't know how much help iCan be, but here are my two cents:

 

--Don't lowball yourself out of what you're in; go to what you really want to do (and don't let your friends' or others' lives determine that for you), because you don't sound like you've got any love at all for webDev

 

--Konsider TES; iKnow it sounds lame, but they've hired many modders from their community//they have a toolkit, although I shan't rain praise on it it's functional and relatively intuitive. The community's also pretty friendly and welcoming to fresh meat so I think if you set yourself down and treat this like a job, nine-to-five a mod for whatever amount of time you can arrange. If you kan't or don't want to mod TES, konsider the multiplicity other options-- but really, they're the only people who make a habit of hiring their modders, and you yourself said you didn't wanna just do modding

 

 

B®e(a)st of luck broSkii. Also, as a fringe, have you konsidered changing tracks to a less boring liberal arts? PubAdmin's where promising young intellectuals go to die inside.

[Pop]

Good points all! I'm in Public Admin because I initially thought it was something that interested me, also because it was the only avenue from a Poli Sci BA that seemed to lead into a good job market.

[Gorth]

Entirely anecdotal, but... it is entirely possible to suck badly at math and do well in a development capacity. Ok, maybe as long as you don't have to invent new math problem solving solutions

[Enoch]

Good points all! I'm in Public Admin because I initially thought it was something that interested me, also because it was the only avenue from a Poli Sci BA that seemed to lead into a good job market.

 

Heh.  The place I work is full of folks matching this description-- a whole lot of people with Masters degrees in public policy (or similar), and a smaller group with JDs.  (I'm of the latter type, with a History/Econ BA.) 

 

Consequently, I can offer little other than well wishes, and congratulations on (a) figuring all this out while you're young enough to do something about it, and (b) avoiding the trap that is Law School.  You've always struck me as a sharp individual who can write in an engaging fashion, which should serve well across a broad range of potential endeavors. 

[J.Burke]

Entirely anecdotal, but... it is entirely possible to suck badly at math and do well in a development capacity. Ok, maybe as long as you don't have to invent new math problem solving solutions

 

As a programmer:

It is entirely possible to not use much math depending on what you want to do or what type of games you are making. The problem is that you are expected to know the material when taking your test and when going into an interview.

 

The exception may be in the mobile or social frontier, but I have no experience applying for jobs at mobile or social companies.

[Pop]

 

Good points all! I'm in Public Admin because I initially thought it was something that interested me, also because it was the only avenue from a Poli Sci BA that seemed to lead into a good job market.

 

Heh.  The place I work is full of folks matching this description-- a whole lot of people with Masters degrees in public policy (or similar), and a smaller group with JDs.  (I'm of the latter type, with a History/Econ BA.) 

 

Consequently, I can offer little other than well wishes, and congratulations on (a) figuring all this out while you're young enough to do something about it, and (b) avoiding the trap that is Law School.  You've always struck me as a sharp individual who can write in an engaging fashion, which should serve well across a broad range of potential endeavors. 

Thanks! Before I bolt from my program I think I'll probably lock down a few courses on cost-benefit analysis and maybe program evaluation, those are skills that are broadly applicable (and I can always write well, which I'm told is surprisingly helpful).

 

And yeah, I knew law school was toxic from the get-go. By the time I was contemplating graduate studies, research on the gulf between law degree cost/debt and the availability of work in the field was well-established (stories abound of folks outside the top 3 ivies getting secretarial work with their JDs)

 

 

 

 

Entirely anecdotal, but... it is entirely possible to suck badly at math and do well in a development capacity. Ok, maybe as long as you don't have to invent new math problem solving solutions

 

As a programmer:

It is entirely possible to not use much math depending on what you want to do or what type of games you are making. The problem is that you are expected to know the material when taking your test and when going into an interview.

 

The exception may be in the mobile or social frontier, but I have no experience applying for jobs at mobile or social companies.

Indeed. I have a friend who makes games for Kongregate and even though he describes a lot of his work as glorified web design he still has to have a solid grasp of linear algebra and trig. He advised me to consider level design as a focus given my limited experience, with engine tools / VFX stuff being beyond my ken.

 

I guess I have to decide whether I want to start going for a BS in CS (which I'm told is more or less a requirement to get hired onto AAA teams unless you are a modder savant) or become an autodidact and start making simple ****. I guess I could snag a free copy of Unity and start learning C# (might be a bit too deep-end) or I could start fooling with Javascript and turn out a tetris clone just like a first-year Devry student. I want to do SOMETHING, though. If only there were better tutorials on how to use the WEIDU stuff, I could have made some class-A BG2 mods (not to brag, I really liked what I was doing before I hit a wall with more complex scripting). I guess I could sit tight til Wasteland 2 comes out and I can try my hand at modding for it, perhaps prepare myself for P:E modding.

 

So, uh, what would y'all advise? Is there a textbook that anyone would recommend? 

[Dream]

Oh hey, first world problems.

[Malcador]

So cutting, man.