Question for the regulars here

[Cantousent]

I know it's pathetic to ask this here. Aw well, here goes:

 

I'm estranged from my family. I've refused to talk to them for years. I have one cousin who sends me information about what's happening in texts to which I don't respond.

 

My dad has been sick for years. Now, I don't care about most of my family, but I love my dad and miss him. He's been in hospice for a couple of months and now they've taken him off of all his medicine this morning and put him on a morphine drip. They anticipate he'll die within the next several hours to maybe a week as of the time I received the texts a few hours ago. How silly and frivolous would it be to make my Project Eternity pledge in his name and have his information used for everything associated with the pledge tier? I don't know. I feel stupid even asking, but you guys are gamers and some of you have been coming here for years.

[kirottu]

It's only silly if you're not a gamer.

[Tale]

I'm not socialized well enough to really understand the point of memorialization. But I suspect they're often as much about comforting those who grieve as they are in honoring the mentioned. If it helps you, I do not see it as a bad idea.

[Gorgon]

Go see him man, you are going to kick yourself later if you don't.

[LadyCrimson]

If it's important/comforting to you and one of your ways of honoring/remembering a loved one, that's what matters. There's nothing frivolous, pathetic, or silly about wanting to do that.

 

I'm sorry to hear about your father, Cant. Hugs.

[Blarghagh]

That's a crappy situation - my sympathies. I feel that if it's a way to honor his memory that means something to you, go for it. This is your thing to deal with, not anyone else's.

[Hurlshort]

I wish I could offer advice, but I am also very recently estranged from my family. I really have no idea what I will do when faced with their health issues.

 

As for making the pledge, I don't want to come across as harsh Cant, but I do feel like this is something for you and not for your father. It will make you feel better. I would say this even if your were making a contribution to charity in his name. It may help your conscience, but how will it make him feel? Will he understand it? I don't know enough about your relationship to answer that, of course.

 

I've been praying for guidance with my own estrangement, I'll add you to my prayers

[Fionavar]

Think I'll pick up my phone now ... Light & Prayer as you navigate this Cantousent!

[Cantousent]

Think I'll pick up my phone now ... Light & Prayer as you navigate this Cantousent!

Many thanks. Always hard to express the complexity of our relationships with our families, isn't it? Always good to hear from a friend.

[Gorth]

Put up camp beside his bed and stay put until time us up. Blame Einstein and his stupid law of relativity, but that law is one of those things still needing to be bent a bit. Time lost doesn't come back. If you care about somebody, living or late, pay tribute any way you can

[Malcador]

Best of luck dealing with this.

[Cantousent]

It's no biggie, Mal. We get older and eventually die. That's how the universe works. I appreciate everyone's answers. As it turns out, he stopped breathing about an hour ago and the hospice workers arrive and verified that he's dead just a few minutes ago according to the texts. There wouldn't have been time to drive there before it happened anyway by the time I could have left. Mods, feel free to close this thread.

[Gorth]

Nothing really to offer but condolences and hopes that he led a good life

 

Just pm somebody if you change your mind about locking it.