Walsingham Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 Inspired by mkreku's recent efforts in mail-order-briding I had an idea for endangered species, and particularly the tortoises of the Indian ocean. Mr Randriamanampisoa says tortoise numbers are rapidly dwindling and they risk extinction over the next decade. "Even if the poaching stops now, the natural habitat is so vast, there are chances that the females cannot meet the males in the wild to mate and to have babies," he says. Could one fit tortoises with a bionic, network enabled love-seeking module? Or, alternatively, somehow enhance their love-generating signals? And of course by love I mean hot sweaty tortoise sex. "It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"." -Elwood Blues tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raithe Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 There are times I wonder just how much work Wals actually gets up to.. and then he produces these ideas, and I really truly know.. "Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Walsingham Posted June 28, 2011 Author Share Posted June 28, 2011 There are times I wonder just how much work Wals actually gets up to.. and then he produces these ideas, and I really truly know.. I'll have you know that I'm official tortoise horn czar, heading the Offtorthorn quango, set up under Gordon Brown because he fancied benefiting from its efforts. "It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"." -Elwood Blues tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raithe Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 I'll have you know that I'm official tortoise horn czar, heading the Offtorthorn quango, set up under Gordon Brown because he fancied benefiting from its efforts. It's all about the tortoiseshell baaaby. "Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Humodour Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 You've got white-out all over your screen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morgoth Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 (edited) When I was a kid, I once had a greek turtle. She was still very small. I build a structure with grids so I could put her outside to get some sun, fresh grass and a tomato. One day, I thought, what the heck, the poor thing maybe wanna explore the whole garden. So I put her outside the grid. But watching her crawling slower than a snail kinda tired me, so I got inside house and made me some soda. I also watched some TV for 5 min, until I was reminded the turtle is still out there. So I rushed outside and thing was gone! Gone. I don't think it has survived the coming winter, so I still feel kinda bad. I switched to parrots then, but they drove me nuts so I sold them. I don't feel bad about that at all though. That is my story. Edited June 28, 2011 by Morgoth Rain makes everything better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gfted1 Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 As a boy growing up in Florida I used to go catch and release turtles all the time just for the hell of it. I also had a parrot that I got rid of because it was driving me nuts. "I'm your biggest fan, Ill follow you until you love me, Papa" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Calax Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 You've got white-out all over your screen. You think your Commodore 64 is really neat-o? Victor of the 5 year fan fic competition! Kevin Butler will awesome your face off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raithe Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 And who is still downloading pictures of Sarah Michelle Gellar? "Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kirottu Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 Inspired by mkreku's recent efforts in mail-order-briding I had an idea for endangered species, and particularly the tortoises of the Indian ocean. If you had been truly inspired by mkreku's mail-order bride then that tortoise had been in bikini. I don't remember the last time I was this dissapointed. This post is not to be enjoyed, discussed, or referenced on company time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nepenthe Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 I don't think you guys got rid of the parrots in time. You're a cheery wee bugger, Nep. Have I ever said that? Reapercussions Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gfted1 Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 ^ I should have known it was a trap. Someone at my wifes work was just giving it away (bird, cage, feeders, etc...) for free. I laughed to myself as I thought what a fool this person must be. Parrots are expensive after all! Well, turns out I was the fool as this god damn bird would not stop squaking when you left the room, like it got lonely or something. So a few weeks after I got it I couldnt stands it no more so I gave it away to the next chump that thought it was a great idea. "I'm your biggest fan, Ill follow you until you love me, Papa" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Humodour Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 And who is still downloading pictures of Sarah Michelle Gellar? If I ever meet you I'll control-alt-delete you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Walsingham Posted June 28, 2011 Author Share Posted June 28, 2011 Actually, it occurs to me that the guidance system has to fucntion for a period corresponding to the travel time. So really what we need is both a networked guidance system for these damn turtles, plus freaking rockets. I don't know much about sexy tortoises, but I don't see how momma tortoise is going to react badly if poppa tortoise hoofs up in a scything wake of rocket powered turbulence, and thundering George . "It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"." -Elwood Blues tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monte Carlo Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 I run a leading anti-tortoise trafficking charity called Shell-Shock. Millions of vulnerable tortoises (and indeed turtles and terrapins) are smuggled into the UK to satisfy the twisted desires of monsters like Walsingham. Please PM me your credit card details so I can fund the tortoise-salvation fightback immediately. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Walsingham Posted June 28, 2011 Author Share Posted June 28, 2011 Lies! Monte runs a snack franchise called Fast Food, that specialises in things like turtles, sloths, and snails. Don't send him your cash unless you want a hoi sin hibernating bear in a bap. "It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"." -Elwood Blues tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monte Carlo Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 Bah! Feeble counter-slurs won't save you this time, you reptile-obsessed creature of the night. The game is up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Malcador Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 You people are weird. Why has elegance found so little following? Elegance has the disadvantage that hard work is needed to achieve it and a good education to appreciate it. - Edsger Wybe Dijkstra Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raithe Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 You people are weird. wilkommen to the interwebz! "Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nightshape Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 (edited) You people are weird. wilkommen to the interwebz! wilkommen to ze intarwebz! [fixed] Edited June 28, 2011 by Nightshape I came up with Crate 3.0 technology. Crate 4.0 - we shall just have to wait and see.Down and out on the Solomani RimNow the Spinward Marches don't look so GRIM! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Humodour Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 You people are weird. wilkommen to the interwebz! wilkommen to ze intarwebz! [fixed] Willkommen auf der Internet! [fixed] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nepenthe Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 The parrots are now here. You're a cheery wee bugger, Nep. Have I ever said that? Reapercussions Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orogun01 Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 You people are weird. wilkommen to the interwebz! wilkommen to ze intarwebz! [fixed] Willkommen auf der Internet! [fixed] TOUCH MY MONKEY!! I'd say the answer to that question is kind of like the answer to "who's the sucker in this poker game?"* *If you can't tell, it's you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Walsingham Posted June 28, 2011 Author Share Posted June 28, 2011 I wanted to run with KILLWOMEN OF THE INTERNUDES, but I can't find anything remotely safe for work/forum guidelines. "It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"." -Elwood Blues tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morgoth Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 You people are weird. wilkommen to the interwebz! wilkommen to ze intarwebz! [fixed] Willkommen auf der Internet! [fixed] Willkommen im Internet! [fixed] PS: This time for real. Rain makes everything better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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