Jump to content

Darth Vader Robs Bank


Guard Dog

Recommended Posts

article-0-0A8B87CD000005DC-113_468x320.jpg

 

When a six-foot man strode into a Long Island bank yesterday dressed as sci-fi super villain Darth Vader, customers and staff thought it was a joke.

But they soon realised how serious the man was when he produced a handgun and demanded cash.

Police in New York are now trying to trace the phantom menace, who stuffed cash into a bag and disappeared.

 

The man entered the Chase Bank in East Setauket around 11:30am, wearing the distinctive Darth Vader mask, a long black cloak and - slightly out of character - camouflage combat trousers.

 

One customer thought the outfit was so funny that he started joking with the dark lord as he tried to pull off his heist.

 

Suffolk County Police Detective Sergeant William Lamb said: 'The customer thought it might have been a joke, and not a serious attempt at a robbery.'

But staff and customers were left in no doubt when the man then produced a handgun from a bag and screamed, 'This is not a joke' to cashiers.

 

Police have released CCTV images of the man stuffing the money into a drawstring bag featuring a New York Yankees logo.

 

As he left the robber punched another customer who tried to stop him.

 

The bank was still checking its drawers last night to figure out how large his take was, Detective Lamb said.

 

It was the second recent off-the-wall bank robbery. On Wednesday, the NYPD arrested a man dubbed the 'Bouquet Bandit', who acquired his unusual nickname after bringing flowers and potted plants into the banks he robbed.

 

Link & more pics: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/worldnews/...aring-raid.html

 

Wow, things must be pretty tough for ol Anakin, what with the fall of the empire and all.

 

You know what stikes me as really funny, he suffed the cash in a New York Yankees bag. In baseball, the joke nickname of the Yankees is the "Evil Empire".

 

I also found it funny how nobody took him seriously at first. I guess they don't know the power of the Dark Side!

  • Like 1

"While it is true you learn with age, the down side is what you often learn is what a damn fool you were before"

Thomas Sowell

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hmmm I wonder if anyone has checked Hayden Christiansens alibi? That guy has been out of work for so long it might have been him.

 

C'mon guys I expected a ton of one liners and sarcastic comments about this story. Get with the program here!

"While it is true you learn with age, the down side is what you often learn is what a damn fool you were before"

Thomas Sowell

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The mismatched pants could be the genius element. Anyone who might look beyond the vader costune and note something actually useful is going to hit the reserve element of the pants.

"It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"."

             -Elwood Blues

 

tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

May The (police) Force Be With Him

"While it is true you learn with age, the down side is what you often learn is what a damn fool you were before"

Thomas Sowell

Link to comment
Share on other sites

He should've carried one of those Spyder III Pro Arctic Wicked laser pointers.

“Things are as they are. Looking out into the universe at night, we make no comparisons between right and wrong stars, nor between well and badly arranged constellations.” – Alan Watts
Link to comment
Share on other sites

What's the current price tag on Death Stars?

“He who joyfully marches to music in rank and file has already earned my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, since for him the spinal cord would surely suffice.” - Albert Einstein

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Looks like Vader is indeed looking to buy a Star Destroyer:

 

Cashier: "What'll it be?"

 

Vader: "I'll buy a Star Destroyer"

 

Cashier: "That'll be 55 million credits"

 

Vader: *Force Chokes* "There will be no negotiating." :p

Edited by Nihilus5078

deicideLogo5.jpg

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 1 year later...

We have an update to this story. As you all know, Mr. Vader has fallen on tough times, what with being laid off after the fall of the empire and all. When we last checked he had resorted to petty robbery to support his galactic conquest habit. Now he has hit rock bottom:

 

http://www.clickorlando.com/news/Man-weari...1z/-/index.html

 

After wandering the streets and getting into a drunken brawl with a FHP trooper Mr. Vader was tased and probably "fell down'" a few times as he was being arrested and then taken to a hospital. So ends the sad tale of an unemployed Sith Lord who only wanted to make a better life for himself by corrupting his children and repressing all the people of the galaxy.

 

:p

"While it is true you learn with age, the down side is what you often learn is what a damn fool you were before"

Thomas Sowell

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Not even the Dark Side of the Force can protect him from a copyright lawsuit from Lucas's lawyers.

 

And yet, ironically I'd wager there's more artistic merit in this bank robbery than in 60% of official star wars merchandise.

"It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"."

             -Elwood Blues

 

tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
×
×
  • Create New...