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Uwe Bol going postal.


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Uwe Boll is the worst director EVER!

 

He brought us glorious jewels like:

 

Alone in the Dark and House of the Dead...

 

More info on him at IMDB :)

 

# Far Cry (2006)

# Hunter: The Reckoning (2006)

# Dungeon Siege (2006) (pre-production)

# Bloodrayne (2005) (post-production)

 

See that?

 

More movies based on films that will likely suck major donkey balls...

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# Far Cry (2006)

# Hunter: The Reckoning (2006)

# Dungeon Siege (2006) (pre-production)

# Bloodrayne (2005) (post-production)

 

See that?

 

More movies based on films that will likely suck major donkey balls...

Wow, so many movies in two years. It's like he's not even going to pretend that they're any good. Or maybe, he's the only director anyone can persuade to take them on?

"An electric puddle is not what I need right now." (Nina Kalenkov)

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No matter what the premise or the movies, there's going to be vampirenazicommandodemons from Mars at the end. Also the main character is probably a brooding youngster with a dark past who discovers that she/he's a mutant/half-demon/vampire/the chosen one/etc. The penultimate fight will be in slow motion while there's video game sounds playing in the background. All hail Uwe.

kirottu said:
I was raised by polar bears. I had to fight against blood thirsty wolves and rabid penguins to get my food. Those who were too weak to survive were sent to Sweden.

 

It has made me the man I am today. A man who craves furry hentai.

So let us go and embrace the rustling smells of unseen worlds

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Uwe Boll needs to stop directing and just produce. He's an amazing deal-maker. How else could he get all those properties with all the crap he's done before.

 

On a side note, I went to school with someone who was in Alone in the Dark :D

The area between the balls and the butt is a hotbed of terrorist activity.

Devastatorsig.jpg

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The guy definitely got some kind of talent :D

 

Two movies who are #37 & #38 on the top 100 bottom list (Alone in the Dark & House of the Dead) :shifty:

“He who joyfully marches to music in rank and file has already earned my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, since for him the spinal cord would surely suffice.” - Albert Einstein

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That's what I thought, but if he's only at no. 37 in the all time worst movie list, then he's just an Ed Wood wannabe.  Let him make Tetris: The Movie, and we'll see.

Sounds like many a dream I've had after that preniciously insidious game ... :shifty:

OBSCVRVM PER OBSCVRIVS ET IGNOTVM PER IGNOTIVS

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OPVS ARTIFICEM PROBAT

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Uwe Bol sounds like a contemporary version of Ed Wood.

 

Heh, you beat me to it.

"Some men see things as they are and say why?"
"I dream things that never were and say why not?"
- George Bernard Shaw

"Hope in reality is the worst of all evils because it prolongs the torments of man."
- Friedrich Nietzsche

 

"The amount of energy necessary to refute bull**** is an order of magnitude bigger than to produce it."

- Some guy 

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i think hunter is better, their is too many vampire movies already......

I wish they would give the resident evil director the movies hes actually fair....

Geroge lucas needs to do the same thing about directing and become a full time producer, look at what he's produced, theyve all been majorly acclaimed titles while his directorship has been yelled at on almost all his movies. Most people assume he directed ROtJ and ESB but he didn't he just produced and wrote them (his writing could use a little work too) but he has good ideas at least

Victor of the 5 year fan fic competition!

 

Kevin Butler will awesome your face off.

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i'm only curious as to why anyone cares?  i mean, let's be real... if he's that bad, ignore him, and don't watch his movies.  pretty simple.

taks

Well, yes, I certainly don't plan to watch any of these movies, but then I don't think I've played any of the games. The problem is that if you like these games (and apparently some of them do have decent stories), and you think they might make good movies, then the fact that some rubbish director is cornering the market as the only producer/director who turns games into movies, that's a problem. I notice that games are finding it easier to get serious/famous actors to do voice-overs - maybe it's only a matter of time before the directors follow.

"An electric puddle is not what I need right now." (Nina Kalenkov)

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i'm only curious as to why anyone cares?  i mean, let's be real... if he's that bad, ignore him, and don't watch his movies.  pretty simple.

Well, yes, I certainly don't plan to watch any of these movies, but then I don't think I've played any of the games. The problem is that if you like these games (and apparently some of them do have decent stories), and you think they might make good movies, then the fact that some rubbish director is cornering the market as the only producer/director who turns games into movies, that's a problem. I notice that games are finding it easier to get serious/famous actors to do voice-overs - maybe it's only a matter of time before the directors follow.

just because some imbecile makes a bad version of a film doesn't mean someone else can't make a good one ...

 

For example "The King And I" has been made about seven times (and some of them were pretty ropey). There was a animated film of the LotR (and the producer still believes he has sole film rights) before PJ did his magnum opus. :lol:

OBSCVRVM PER OBSCVRIVS ET IGNOTVM PER IGNOTIVS

ingsoc.gif

OPVS ARTIFICEM PROBAT

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it was live-action animated, actually, which means they painted over actors (for many large scale scenes, like battles) and quite frankly, sucked donkey nuggets.

 

ugh.

 

taks

comrade taks... just because.

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I watched that once  when I was ten  and the chirpy theme music was so irritating that I can still remember it.

 

I've still got the grenadier minatures of the fellowship and badguys which were based on the animated LOTR :shifty:

 

I've never watched a Uwe Boll film (or even seen one available) but I feel I should just so I can experience the true horror.

I have to agree with Volourn.  Bioware is pretty much dead now.  Deals like this kills development studios.

478327[/snapback]

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