Monte Carlo

^ So establishing someone's right to be in the country legitimately is discrimination? Thanks for proving the old saw that 'A liberal is a person who's so open minded his brain fell out.' The issue is how the law is conducted. Cops / immigration people doing it professionally and politely means no problem, as I said in the other thread I've been stopped by US border cops and they were very professional and polite. Shame their colleagues at US airports don't have the same training, but that's another story.

Snakes on a Plane. It's so awful it's good. Now I have to wonder if it's a post modern attempt to make a movie so awful-it's-good.

Yes, I do admire the man who industrialized the Soviet Union and lead it against the Nazis. Certainly the Great Purge was overzealous, but the net effect of Stalin was the defeat of the Nazi menace, a monstrosity far greater and more terrible than the Great Purge. I'll remind you that in four short years the Nazis killed over twenty million Soviet citizens, and they would have done far, far more if they'd had the opportunity. Stalin (alongside the Soviet peoples, of course) denied them that opportunity. It had its price, greater than it needed to be, but "Stalinism" was a net good for the world. Which is why you are best ignored.

LOL coming from an admirer of Stalin.

I think a thread about the future of shared bathroom facilities would be made of pure 24 carat win, Wals. I don't know if you've ever been to the McDonald's at Charing Cross, near Villier's Street (slap bang in the middle of central London) but that has (gasp) shared bathroom facilities of the type you describe.

"What did the Romans ever do for us?"

Good luck to Germany, after a mixed start their young, adventurous team is becoming fun to watch. If they win it will be well-deserved.

double post

I'm not sure about that, not being demanding but I'd like to see a Home Office or SOCA paper making the link. Illegal immigration in the UK is about access to jobs, benefits and services, with a nasty but not insignificant undertone of sexual exploitation, depending on where the people are being trafficked from. Furthermore, the crucial difference between immigration and asylum isn't made. I don't see where drugs come into it. I know (and rather like) lots of Polish people; their diaspora wasn't fuelled by drugs, it was fuelled by prosperity and they've come here completely legitimately as EU citizens. They do like a drink, like I said I rather like them. This doesn't mean that I think that social cohesion is helped by the schools in southern England having a large proportion of foreign-speaking pupils. Our problems remain over-generous benefits and a lack of a border police service. The economic armageddon in public spending in the UK means that benefits will be cut and the Govt. is setting up a border police. This will still be hampered by the ghost in the machine - political correctness. Google 'Common Purpose' every senior public sector manager goes on their networking sessions and they are secretive about what their agenda is. That's enough about the UK. Hurlie, your 'let's treat the big problem' is great, but its only a part of the issue. You are talking about strategy, i.e. fixing a failed narco-state. Folks on the ground are thinking more tactically and who can blame them. Part of the problem is, again, political correctness and the self-loathing of the left. Once upon a time the huddled masses at Ellis Island proudly declared their new identity as Americans while acknowledging their past. Now, you get the impression that being American is a sort of bolt-on to your original identity, even though you've sworn the oath or even worse haven't and are just camping out there using the services and giving nothing back. So please, drawing a distinction between the macro and micro problem is misleading. If I lived in Arizona I'd be in my pick-up, holding the line with the other concerned people. Not because I'm a xenophobe but because when the government lets you down so egregriously rolling onto your back seems like a pretty crappy option.

Hurlie, your position doesn't seem to take into account the core issue about immigration, which is resources. the Left love to dress up the issue as being about race (which is a factor, I'll grant you, but not the issue). US taxpayers fund infrastructure. Illegal immigrants use that infrastructure. They are X and Y axis, when the people using the infrastructure outstrip capacity you get problems. When you get fully socialised health care and a centre-left government your next problem will be health tourism (which is a problem here). When you point it out you will be accused of being a racist. Western liberal democracies are dying not with a bang, but with a whimper, manipulated by Frankfurt school Marxism on the one hand and ignored by rapacious casino-capitalists on the other.

Re-reading Bomber by Len Deighton for the tenth or so time. I'm not being hyperbolic when I suggest it's one of the best war novels ever written. I can't believe it spawned Memphis Bell which while an OK-ish type of movie, dancing perilously on the borders of Meh, it doesn't reflect the brilliance of the novel (about incidentally, a RAF bomber crew - they'd only make a movie about an American one which I suppose gave them the plot-crucial opportunity for Harry Connick Jnr to play the piano). Deighton's novel shows us the consequences of a bombing raid on a small German town in the summer of 1943, through the eyes of the German civilians, a luftwaffe radar controller and the crew of a RAF bomber. The aerial war over Europe isn't exactly an area of WW2 that I'm overly interested in, but the power of the narrative and Deighton's eye for detail grab me in a way few of his other novels have (and he is a fine author). Highly recommended to fellow forumites.

You need to penalise people who hire illegals. Like, lock them up for two years sort of penalties. The parasites who help smuggle refugees? These guys are usually linked to organised crime and they need locking up. Say for ten. Illegals? Rapid deportation, polite, efficient, fast. Take their DNA and politely explain that if they return again they will get a lifetime ban from the USA, a prison sentence then deport them. I've been to Mexico, Arizona, California and Texas. Juarez, El Paso and Tijuana. I think the border controls are impressive, Juarez reminded me of Berlin in 1985 with the chicanes and barbed wire and motion sensors. In two weeks driving through the Big Bend I was stopped by avacado-coloured immigration patrol cars by polite men (many, incidentally, of Latino origin) with guns who searched the boot of my hire car. This would be 1998. I don't know if this is all still in place, but it's not like the border is ignored. Obama is claiming to get on top of this, but it's all aimed at November, triangulation and Chicago-skool BS. If governments don't deal with the properly fairly and sensitively then you get laws like the ones Arizona is passing, and vigilantism. And I can't say I blame them.

^ My apologies, now I have a problem too.

Obviously I will get around to the other questions later (the golf club dilemma is particularly disturbing) but this one requires urgent attention. Firstly, Guard Dog, it is good to know that you are hitting the bottle. When the Nazi threat loomed over Europe in 1939 Winston Churchill famously began drinking heavily and didn't stop until VE Day five years later. So that helps put your dilemma in perspective. Now we've got that out of the way I think we can deal with the real issue - your over-reliance on high technology solutions to an age-old problem. A combination of well-trained carrier pigeons, semophore, nimble-footed runners and (yes) Citizen's Band radio (you can bulk buy these from a friend of mine in Karachi, will PM you his number) I think you can crack this one and come in under budget. Then buy some soothing healing crystals, take a nice long bath with some scented candles in it, order out for some Chinese food and congratulate yourself on a job well done. Cheers MC

Tigranes, check out the mods for Total War games, they rectify many of the issues you discuss. The LotR mod for M:TW2 is especially good.

Wow, why does the language filter have a problem with the word 'nail?' My advice is buy some more from your local hardware store.

So many dilemmas. Serrano: A short-term solution to your problem is difficult. Whilst you are saving money to emigrate to a country with a lower-than-average median summer temperature and pollen count, I suggest you put your sleep-wear in the refrigerator while you are at work. Frosty PJs are the perfect tonic to hot summer nights. Theslug: I'm an agony aunt, not a freaking miracle worker. Give me a break. Hurlie: I am happy to share my experiences of fatherhood with you in this regard. Generally speaking, you should leave all of these tasks to Mrs. Hurlshot to manage, it is after all her biological imperative. Busy yourself with manly tasks such as chopping wood and drinking beer whilst watching sporting events and you will find that these issues resolve themselves. Krezzie: I suspect your problem is that you can be a bit of a humourless tit occasionally. Worry not, it's hardly the end of the world and there is lots of stuff you can be doing about it. With regards to your original question, my head-doctor has found some marginal sociopathic tendencies married with occasional anxiety. Nonetheless, I will raise the issue of Narcissism with him at my next session, if I can drag myself away from the mirror and dusting the 12' tall hardboard mounted photo of myself dressed as Stalin. Like I say, you can't teach wisdom like this and it's all free.

You are clearly assuming that their is consistency around zombie anatomy within the ouevre. If we consider, for a moment, the Dawn of The Dead & 28 Days Later versions of undeath, I'd argue that a small calibre round to the nut is not the way forward. Flamethrowers would be good too, I'd imagine.

Guys, you really aren't considering zombie anatomy. Zombies have no brains, right? You literally have to blow them away, like power-hosing caked mud off of your car. A .22 is fine and dandy to nut a normal human in the swede, I'll grant you. But a zombie? You want a meaty 7.62 Lapua Magnum round, or for complete peace of mind a .50 Cal anti-materiel rifle / Browning vehicle mounted MG. An attractive Czech model with two small sub-compact submachine-pistols isn't going to cut the mustard come the day The Dead Walk The Earth.

Hello mortals. I have decided to nominate myself the forum agony aunt, in these times of equal opportunities I see no reason why a large hairy middle-aged bloke can't have that job title. Anyway, I digress. Please post your problems and dilemmas, however big or small*, and I will share with you the ripest fruits of my wisdom. Cheers MC * smaller the better really, there are highly trained professionals to deal with big problems.

^ thanks Nightshape. I'll hold that thought.

Thanks for the ongoing links, Wrath they are v interesting. They are pretty disturbing and hardly from a biased news source, either.

That would explain the extreme surprise they achieved during the raids on the East Anglian coastline. "Artur, what is that dragon-headed ship out yonder?" "'Tis the end of the tax year, fear not."

It's not so much that, it's more of the under-powered 9mm pistol ammunition. You'd want something with a high cyclic rate of fire and a chunky 7.62mm round for tearing through undead flesh. I suggest the FN-FAL rifle on automatic backed up with the 7.62mm General Purpose Machine Gun, basically a 1980's UK infantry section. Finish it off with a Mossberg jungle gun for close work, and of course an aluminium baseball bat with a few nails hammered through the end.

Right, that's my holiday reading sorted then. Tom Clancy can wait.