Walsingham Posted January 29, 2014 Posted January 29, 2014 Every Steven Seagal movie ever made. http://www.everystevenseagalmovie.com/ For example: My Giant (1998) "Steven Seagal plays himself in a movie about Billy Crystal being a bad father and having a tall friend." 1 "It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"." -Elwood Blues tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.
Humanoid Posted January 29, 2014 Posted January 29, 2014 I didn't know that movie was a thing, so I had assumed the blog was probably just a bunch of photoshopped movie posters with Steven Seagal substituted in for various other actors (e.g. Steven Seagal as the title character in Home Alone). But no, it's the real thing. Huh. 1 L I E S T R O N GL I V E W R O N G
Hiro Protagonist Posted January 29, 2014 Posted January 29, 2014 I'm embarrassed to say I've seen all his movies. Every single one. 1
BruceVC Posted January 29, 2014 Posted January 29, 2014 I'm embarrassed to say I've seen all his movies. Every single one. You right that is embarrassing, and you quite comfortable acknowledging it in a public forum. Have you no shame "Abashed the devil stood and felt how awful goodness is and saw Virtue in her shape how lovely: and pined his loss” John Milton "We don't stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.” - George Bernard Shaw "What counts in life is not the mere fact that we have lived. It is what difference we have made to the lives of others that will determine the significance of the life we lead" - Nelson Mandela
Walsingham Posted January 29, 2014 Author Posted January 29, 2014 I'm embarrassed to say I've seen all his movies. Every single one. How many hours is that? I bet you could have learned French in the same time. 1 "It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"." -Elwood Blues tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.
Hiro Protagonist Posted January 29, 2014 Posted January 29, 2014 (edited) How many hours is that? I bet you could have learned French in the same time. I didn't learn French, but what I did learn is you can combine the movie titles and make out a Steven Seagal movie plot. Such as the example below: My giant the Glimmer Man, on deadly ground, under siege, mercenary for justice and out for justice, out of reach, above the law, marked for death, hard to kill, today you die... Clementine. Edited January 29, 2014 by Hiro Protagonist 2
HoonDing Posted January 29, 2014 Posted January 29, 2014 He's done straight to video exclusively after 2002 or so. All those movies are really really crappy. The ending of the words is ALMSIVI.
Malcador Posted January 29, 2014 Posted January 29, 2014 So no change from his theatrical releases, then. Hm, John Travolta would have been cool in Under Siege Why has elegance found so little following? Elegance has the disadvantage that hard work is needed to achieve it and a good education to appreciate it. - Edsger Wybe Dijkstra
babaganoosh13 Posted January 29, 2014 Posted January 29, 2014 That COPS show of his that was on A&E was hilarious. You see, ever since the whole Doritos Locos Tacos thing, Taco Bell thinks they can do whatever they want.
Walsingham Posted January 30, 2014 Author Posted January 30, 2014 How many hours is that? I bet you could have learned French in the same time. I didn't learn French, but what I did learn is you can combine the movie titles and make out a Steven Seagal movie plot. Such as the example below: My giant the Glimmer Man, on deadly ground, under siege, mercenary for justice and out for justice, out of reach, above the law, marked for death, hard to kill, today you die... Clementine. Should put that in quote marks under a picture of some bloke looking heroic. "It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"." -Elwood Blues tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.
Humanoid Posted January 30, 2014 Posted January 30, 2014 Some bloke? You just have to zoom close enough into a portrait of Seagal to make sure his double chin and hairline are cropped from the final image. L I E S T R O N GL I V E W R O N G
HoonDing Posted January 30, 2014 Posted January 30, 2014 At least he's not a wingnut. ... The ending of the words is ALMSIVI.
Walsingham Posted January 30, 2014 Author Posted January 30, 2014 ~~~~ In other news: "It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"." -Elwood Blues tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.
Walsingham Posted January 31, 2014 Author Posted January 31, 2014 Well, _I_ thought that picture was weird. And scary/awesome. "It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"." -Elwood Blues tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.
Lexx Posted January 31, 2014 Posted January 31, 2014 I don't know what I see there. "only when you no-life you can exist forever, because what does not live cannot die."
Hurlshort Posted January 31, 2014 Posted January 31, 2014 I've been slowly working my way through the Seagal blog, it is fantastic. I pretty much saw all of them until he started in with the direct to video ones. 1
Walsingham Posted February 5, 2014 Author Posted February 5, 2014 In line with topic theme: Richard Burton talks about alcoholism. I dare you to watch it through in one go. "It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"." -Elwood Blues tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.
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