Walsingham Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 I have decided that I need a pipe. i don't want to smoke, but I think to be stylish while pondering thorny issues I should have a pipe. I need suggestions as to how I can get one, and make it worthwile. What I can put in it, for example. Neat gin? Fire ants? "It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"." -Elwood Blues tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.
Musopticon? Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 Should this be a Lousiana corn pipe or a more stylish European cover-top pipe? Both have their merits. kirottu said: I was raised by polar bears. I had to fight against blood thirsty wolves and rabid penguins to get my food. Those who were too weak to survive were sent to Sweden. It has made me the man I am today. A man who craves furry hentai. So let us go and embrace the rustling smells of unseen worlds
Kaftan Barlast Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 The simplest thing would be a tobacco store, wouldnt it? DISCLAIMER: Do not take what I write seriously unless it is clearly and in no uncertain terms, declared by me to be meant in a serious and non-humoristic manner. If there is no clear indication, asume the post is written in jest. This notification is meant very seriously and its purpouse is to avoid misunderstandings and the consequences thereof. Furthermore; I can not be held accountable for anything I write on these forums since the idea of taking serious responsability for my unserious actions, is an oxymoron in itself. Important: as the following sentence contains many naughty words I warn you not to read it under any circumstances; botty, knickers, wee, erogenous zone, psychiatrist, clitoris, stockings, bosom, poetry reading, dentist, fellatio and the department of agriculture. "I suppose outright stupidity and complete lack of taste could also be considered points of view. "
Tale Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 Fire ants would work. "Show me a man who "plays fair" and I'll show you a very talented cheater."
Gfted1 Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 (edited) My vote is for a gigantic Sherlok Holmes type pipe, it will go swimmingly with your monacle. At to what to smoke, most pipe smokers smoke for the flavor so just go to any pipe shop and find one that strikes your fancy. There are literally dozens of flavors to choose from. Edited August 8, 2007 by Gfted1 "I'm your biggest fan, Ill follow you until you love me, Papa"
Tale Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 Get a gigantic bong and fill it with the most noxious substance you can find. Then invite people over for parties. "Show me a man who "plays fair" and I'll show you a very talented cheater."
Laozi Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 (edited) I would stay away from ivory or whale bone, since you'll be attracting alot of attention with your new pipe, you certainly don't want to give the invious non-pipe smokers any ammo to take you down a notch. I would go with a simply one, maybe made of something like brazilian mahogony or another nice wood. My first pipe actually belonged to my father and was a moderately priced piece. I would also suggest that you work on your pipe mannerisms, since this is what will really solidify you as a pipesmoker. Pointing at things with the pipe during a conversation is a good start, might want to watch a few Carey Grant movies. Any good pipe store should allow you to sample the tobacco before you bye it so that shouldn't be a problem. I started smoking a pipe because I didn't want to be like the girls at school with their cigarettes and having to smoke at every "break". Edited August 8, 2007 by Laozi People laugh when I say that I think a jellyfish is one of the most beautiful things in the world. What they don't understand is, I mean a jellyfish with long, blond hair.
Pidesco Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 Try oregano. It has a nice kick. "My hovercraft is full of eels!" - Hungarian touristI am Dan Quayle of the Romans.I want to tattoo a map of the Netherlands on my nether lands.Heja Sverige!!Everyone should cuffawkle more.The wrench is your friend.
Aram Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 You're British! Go to the Dunhill store and get a briar pipe. Or get a Charatan or something. Then walk around with it in your mouth and anytime someone says something (which 90% of the time will be about the weather) puff on it and say "Quite."
Guard Dog Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 You are an intellectual type so I agree with Giftd, go with the Sherlock look. It will add a certain restrained diginity. If it were me, I'd go with the corn cob pipe. It will go well with a clay jug full of moonshine and a rocking chair on a covered porch. "While it is true you learn with age, the down side is what you often learn is what a damn fool you were before" Thomas Sowell
@\NightandtheShape/@ Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 *shakes head at thread* "I'm a programmer at a games company... REET GOOD!" - Me
SteveThaiBinh Posted August 9, 2007 Posted August 9, 2007 Pipes aren't stylish. Smoking isn't stylish. Smoking kills. Educate yourself. Also, have you considered the hidden health dangers of pondering? "An electric puddle is not what I need right now." (Nina Kalenkov)
Dark_Raven Posted August 9, 2007 Posted August 9, 2007 I have decided that I need a pipe. i don't want to smoke, but I think to be stylish while pondering thorny issues I should have a pipe. I need suggestions as to how I can get one, and make it worthwile. What I can put in it, for example. Neat gin? Fire ants? Crack pipe or a hookah may work. Hades was the life of the party. RIP You'll be missed.
Musopticon? Posted August 9, 2007 Posted August 9, 2007 My friend has a convertible pipe with joints that you can also use a fridge magnet. It isn't...really a pipe that you can just saunter down the street puffing with though, heh. That said, once you have a pipe, remember to saunter. It's important, that walk is done with a puff in mind. Quite. kirottu said: I was raised by polar bears. I had to fight against blood thirsty wolves and rabid penguins to get my food. Those who were too weak to survive were sent to Sweden. It has made me the man I am today. A man who craves furry hentai. So let us go and embrace the rustling smells of unseen worlds
Aram Posted August 9, 2007 Posted August 9, 2007 puff, puff My word! I seem to be developing throat cancer! puff, puff Qui--COUGH--ite.
Bela Posted August 9, 2007 Posted August 9, 2007 Get a bubble pipe. Will Save penalty vs. Kitty: -20 GCS d(--) s--: a C+++$ US++>$ P+++$ L+(++) E--- W++ N+ w--- V- PS+ PE Y+ t+@ 5++ X R+ tv(+) b+ DI++ D+ G+ e++ h-() r+++ x? How many nuns would a nunchuk chuck if a nunchuk could chuck nuns?
Walsingham Posted August 9, 2007 Author Posted August 9, 2007 See? Aram understand completely what I'm talking about. *Puff puff. Frown* *Speaks past stem of pipe* The real issue is NOT to smoke tobacco. Or any other substance such as roofing tar which will kill my lungs and stain the ceiling. Pure benzene is probably out. Do you think having the pipe and not actually smoking it would be sufficiently reminiscent of someone who USED to smoke a pipe heavily and is now only quitting on the strength of the sternest admonitions of their tweed suited country doctor? "It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"." -Elwood Blues tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.
Musopticon? Posted August 9, 2007 Posted August 9, 2007 Among complete strangers, quite. Among peers, you'd be a doofus. kirottu said: I was raised by polar bears. I had to fight against blood thirsty wolves and rabid penguins to get my food. Those who were too weak to survive were sent to Sweden. It has made me the man I am today. A man who craves furry hentai. So let us go and embrace the rustling smells of unseen worlds
Guard Dog Posted August 9, 2007 Posted August 9, 2007 Among complete strangers, quite. Among peers, you'd be a doofus. "While it is true you learn with age, the down side is what you often learn is what a damn fool you were before" Thomas Sowell
Kaftan Barlast Posted August 9, 2007 Posted August 9, 2007 Having a fine pipe and not smoking it is like buying a car and... not driving it DISCLAIMER: Do not take what I write seriously unless it is clearly and in no uncertain terms, declared by me to be meant in a serious and non-humoristic manner. If there is no clear indication, asume the post is written in jest. This notification is meant very seriously and its purpouse is to avoid misunderstandings and the consequences thereof. Furthermore; I can not be held accountable for anything I write on these forums since the idea of taking serious responsability for my unserious actions, is an oxymoron in itself. Important: as the following sentence contains many naughty words I warn you not to read it under any circumstances; botty, knickers, wee, erogenous zone, psychiatrist, clitoris, stockings, bosom, poetry reading, dentist, fellatio and the department of agriculture. "I suppose outright stupidity and complete lack of taste could also be considered points of view. "
Walsingham Posted August 9, 2007 Author Posted August 9, 2007 Having a fine pipe and not smoking it is like buying a car and... not driving it Given the self-harm in the context I'd argue it was more like owning a camel. "It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"." -Elwood Blues tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.
SteveThaiBinh Posted August 13, 2007 Posted August 13, 2007 I'm guessing it's supposed to be 'quite' but it looks more like 'quilt' to me. "An electric puddle is not what I need right now." (Nina Kalenkov)
Aram Posted August 13, 2007 Posted August 13, 2007 I'm severely disappointed that only three of us have gotten pipe avatars as a result of this thread.
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