Walsingham Posted January 1, 2006 Posted January 1, 2006 I'm afraid I must concur. I diagnose a cocoon. Your nose is clearly the orifice you ar extruding the material from. The downside is that you are a revolting freak. The upside is you can make superstrong fabrics! Just think how pleased your wife will be when she learns you can make stockings! "It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"." -Elwood Blues tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.
Commissar Posted January 1, 2006 Author Posted January 1, 2006 what others buggs ya got? crabs??? <{POST_SNAPBACK}> I don't even know if we have spiders. Still haven't seen one, and it's January, for Christ's sake. They should all be hibernating or something.
Gabrielle Posted January 1, 2006 Posted January 1, 2006 spiders are pretty little creatures why do them harm.? They are prob hiding in underneath ur bed.
Musopticon? Posted January 1, 2006 Posted January 1, 2006 I'm afraid I must concur. I diagnose a cocoon. Your nose is clearly the orifice you ar extruding the material from. The downside is that you are a revolting freak. The upside is you can make superstrong fabrics! Just think how pleased your wife will be when she learns you can make stockings! <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Word. Or maybe you're starting metamorphosis and the webbings are building material for your chrysalis. I'd go to somewhere warm and humid and see if you turn green and start to fly in a week. kirottu said: I was raised by polar bears. I had to fight against blood thirsty wolves and rabid penguins to get my food. Those who were too weak to survive were sent to Sweden. It has made me the man I am today. A man who craves furry hentai. So let us go and embrace the rustling smells of unseen worlds
Commissar Posted January 1, 2006 Author Posted January 1, 2006 spiders are pretty little creatures why do them harm.? They are prob hiding in underneath ur bed. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Because they apparently tried to tie me up and steal my wallet last night. Plus, the wife hates them, and I don't really like being obliged to stay awake until she's asleep, dutifully holding a flashlight and a can of Raid.
LoneWolf16 Posted January 1, 2006 Posted January 1, 2006 spiders are pretty little creatures why do them harm.? They are prob hiding in underneath ur bed. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Because they apparently tried to tie me up and steal my wallet last night. Plus, the wife hates them, and I don't really like being obliged to stay awake until she's asleep, dutifully holding a flashlight and a can of Raid. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Awww... That's so sweet. :D I had thought that some of nature's journeymen had made men and not made them well, for they imitated humanity so abominably. - Book of Counted Sorrows 'Cause I won't know the man that kills me and I don't know these men I kill but we all wind up on the same side 'cause ain't none of us doin' god's will. - Everlast
SteveThaiBinh Posted January 1, 2006 Posted January 1, 2006 Try sleeping with the light on and a mosquito net. "An electric puddle is not what I need right now." (Nina Kalenkov)
Lucius Posted January 1, 2006 Posted January 1, 2006 Eeeew that's ****ing nasty. I hate bloody spiders, smash em all I say! We don't have poisonous spiders in Denmark or the rest of Scandinavia luckily, if there was no doubt they would have killed me for smooshing all their friends. :ph34r: DENMARK! It appears that I have not yet found a sig to replace the one about me not being banned... interesting.
thepixiesrock Posted January 1, 2006 Posted January 1, 2006 The spider could have crawled into your ear. It happened to my uncle's friend, it laid eggs in his ear and he had to go to the doctor and get tem removed. Lou Gutman, P.I.- It's like I'm not even trying anymore!http://theatomicdanger.iforumer.com/index....theatomicdangerOne billion b-balls dribbling simultaneously throughout the galaxy. One trillion b-balls being slam dunked through a hoop throughout the galaxy. I can feel every single b-ball that has ever existed at my fingertips. I can feel their collective knowledge channeling through my viens. Every jumpshot, every rebound and three-pointer, every layup, dunk, and free throw. I am there.
Lucius Posted January 1, 2006 Posted January 1, 2006 DENMARK! It appears that I have not yet found a sig to replace the one about me not being banned... interesting.
Arkendale Posted January 1, 2006 Posted January 1, 2006 Eeeew that's ****ing nasty. I hate bloody spiders, smash em all I say! We don't have poisonous spiders in Denmark or the rest of Scandinavia luckily, if there was no doubt they would have killed me for smooshing all their friends. :ph34r: <{POST_SNAPBACK}> I hate spiders and almost everything that has more than 6 legs. I certainly hope you don't have one up your nose or in your ear, that would be scary
LoneWolf16 Posted January 1, 2006 Posted January 1, 2006 The spider could have crawled into your ear. It happened to my uncle's friend, it laid eggs in his ear and he had to go to the doctor and get tem removed. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> He makes a valid point...I'd get to a doctor.....just to be sure. The thought of hundreds of baby spiders crawling around inside my head is just... :'( ::lays down and rocks in the fetal position:: I had thought that some of nature's journeymen had made men and not made them well, for they imitated humanity so abominably. - Book of Counted Sorrows 'Cause I won't know the man that kills me and I don't know these men I kill but we all wind up on the same side 'cause ain't none of us doin' god's will. - Everlast
SteveThaiBinh Posted January 1, 2006 Posted January 1, 2006 I certainly hope you don't have one up your nose or in your ear, that would be scary <{POST_SNAPBACK}> I think it would be scarier for the spider. You could take this experience as a symbolic cocoon, a chance for you to emerge reborn and renewed, make substantial changes in your life, keep those New Year Resolutions this time. Or perhaps there's a religion that would accept it as a miracle? Do any of the patterns of spiderweb look at all like the face of Jesus? "An electric puddle is not what I need right now." (Nina Kalenkov)
Lucius Posted January 1, 2006 Posted January 1, 2006 He is the One. DENMARK! It appears that I have not yet found a sig to replace the one about me not being banned... interesting.
Musopticon? Posted January 1, 2006 Posted January 1, 2006 (edited) Wasn't Kum the One until now? Edited January 1, 2006 by Musopticon? kirottu said: I was raised by polar bears. I had to fight against blood thirsty wolves and rabid penguins to get my food. Those who were too weak to survive were sent to Sweden. It has made me the man I am today. A man who craves furry hentai. So let us go and embrace the rustling smells of unseen worlds
Surreptishus Posted January 1, 2006 Posted January 1, 2006 Sinus problem - probably spiders hatching in your head. Covered in web - In Islam there is a story of how their prophet was on the run and hid in a cave, miraculously a spider spun a web across the mouth of the cave thus obscuring Mohammed from his would be captors. There are proabably simillar stories in other cultures, as is the way of things but maybe you will be the new leader of Islam... Spiders in ear - Like Wrath of Khan )
Commissar Posted January 1, 2006 Author Posted January 1, 2006 spiders are pretty little creatures why do them harm.? They are prob hiding in underneath ur bed. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Because they apparently tried to tie me up and steal my wallet last night. Plus, the wife hates them, and I don't really like being obliged to stay awake until she's asleep, dutifully holding a flashlight and a can of Raid. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Awww... That's so sweet. :D <{POST_SNAPBACK}> No. Know what? It's not sweet. Nothing about marriage is sweet or cute after the first month or so. I made the argument, and I was dead ****ing serious, that she should be the one to stay up, if one of us had to, since the spiders went after me. But no, she says, she's the one who's afraid of spiders, so I should stay up. But I'm going to sleep eventually, I say. Sure, she says, but not until I go to sleep, to make sure no spiders get on me. Will you go to bed early, I ask. No, she says. But when I do go to bed, I'll be asleep in like ten minutes. Which of course she's not, because when someone's waiting for you to go to sleep, what do you do? You stay awake to make sure they're awake and waiting for. Me? I can fall asleep at the drop of a hat. Give me the Season 2 episode of Columbo, A Stitch in Crime, and there's a certain five-minute section, a conversation between Peter Falk and Leonard Nimoy, that puts me to sleep without fail. WITHOUT FAIL. But she has to stay up half the damn night, making sure that I'm staying up to keep these phantom spiders off of her. And you know what else? I wanted some booty. It was a good night for it, damnit, and she had earlier mentioned the little French maid outfit, which I thought was an absolutely aces idea. But spiders in the bed kill sex, of course. And I still can't find a single goddamn spider. I've been looking everywhere, working on the theory that if they're truly malicious, they'd know I was looking for them, and thus found a way to travel farther than the average spider, so I'm checking downstairs and ****. No dice. And since I can't find a single ****ing culprit, she's still freaked out, so guess what that means? No sex for Commissar, with or without costumes. Little ****-blockers. When I woke up and felt spiderwebs, I thought, "Man, this sucks." I had no idea.
Surreptishus Posted January 1, 2006 Posted January 1, 2006 Hmm, so your saying these spiders are puritan?
Commissar Posted January 1, 2006 Author Posted January 1, 2006 Hmm, so your saying these spiders are puritan? <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Or Republican.
Commissar Posted January 1, 2006 Author Posted January 1, 2006 Bush has gone too far! <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Damn right. Torture? Fine. Eavesdropping? Sure. But sending trained spiders to prevent my wife from dressin' up all slutty is crossing a line.
LoneWolf16 Posted January 1, 2006 Posted January 1, 2006 No. Know what? It's not sweet. Nothing about marriage is sweet or cute after the first month or so. I made the argument, and I was dead ****ing serious, that she should be the one to stay up, if one of us had to, since the spiders went after me. But no, she says, she's the one who's afraid of spiders, so I should stay up. But I'm going to sleep eventually, I say. Sure, she says, but not until I go to sleep, to make sure no spiders get on me. Will you go to bed early, I ask. No, she says. But when I do go to bed, I'll be asleep in like ten minutes. Which of course she's not, because when someone's waiting for you to go to sleep, what do you do? You stay awake to make sure they're awake and waiting for. Me? I can fall asleep at the drop of a hat. Give me the Season 2 episode of Columbo, A Stitch in Crime, and there's a certain five-minute section, a conversation between Peter Falk and Leonard Nimoy, that puts me to sleep without fail. WITHOUT FAIL. But she has to stay up half the damn night, making sure that I'm staying up to keep these phantom spiders off of her. And you know what else? I wanted some booty. It was a good night for it, damnit, and she had earlier mentioned the little French maid outfit, which I thought was an absolutely aces idea. But spiders in the bed kill sex, of course. And I still can't find a single goddamn spider. I've been looking everywhere, working on the theory that if they're truly malicious, they'd know I was looking for them, and thus found a way to travel farther than the average spider, so I'm checking downstairs and ****. No dice. And since I can't find a single ****ing culprit, she's still freaked out, so guess what that means? No sex for Commissar, with or without costumes. Little ****-blockers. When I woke up and felt spiderwebs, I thought, "Man, this sucks." I had no idea. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> I'm...sensing some bitterness. Not sure, but I'm getting this really subtle vibe. I had thought that some of nature's journeymen had made men and not made them well, for they imitated humanity so abominably. - Book of Counted Sorrows 'Cause I won't know the man that kills me and I don't know these men I kill but we all wind up on the same side 'cause ain't none of us doin' god's will. - Everlast
Child of Flame Posted January 1, 2006 Posted January 1, 2006 You do realize that Raid will not kill spiders don't you?
Recommended Posts