Ioini Posted July 8, 2005 Posted July 8, 2005 Revan: What the hell was I thinking leaving Bastila behind?! Handmaiden: Now where did I put my tampon? Kreia: Everyone trusts me! Bao-Dur: Why does everyone say I look like Diesel? --------------- Palpatine: Anakin, I want to tell you something. I'm secertly in love with you. Vader: WTF? *Chops him up with his saber*
jodo kast 5 Posted July 8, 2005 Posted July 8, 2005 Revan: What the hell was I thinking leaving Bastila behind?! Handmaiden: Now where did I put my tampon? Kreia: Everyone trusts me! Bao-Dur: Why does everyone say I look like Diesel? --------------- Palpatine: Anakin, I want to tell you something. I'm secertly in love with you. Vader: WTF? *Chops him up with his saber* <{POST_SNAPBACK}> those are all great esspecially the Hanmaiden-tampon one
jodo kast 5 Posted July 8, 2005 Posted July 8, 2005 Mind Trick - helping jedis get laid since 1869 <{POST_SNAPBACK}> teach me to do that! :cool: :D
Ioini Posted July 8, 2005 Posted July 8, 2005 Atton: Han Solo who? Disciple: I hope Shrek doesn't find me in this game. Visas: I'm not a virgin. Mandalore: I love the republic, in fact i'm going to be a senator someday! -------------- Sidious: I...I....I....can't hold it on any longer. Anakin: What are you doing under those clothes?
jodo kast 5 Posted July 8, 2005 Posted July 8, 2005 In the third one if you are able to be Revan again (female... hopfully) Carth: Damn it woman. If you keep hounding me, Im going to put you over my knee and teach you a lesson Revan: Is that a promis? <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Lovable
jodo kast 5 Posted July 8, 2005 Posted July 8, 2005 Disciple: I hope Shrek doesn't find me in this game. Visas: I'm not a virgin. -------------- Sidious: I...I....I....can't hold it on any longer. Anakin: What are you doing under those clothes? <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Hahahahahahaha, oh god the Sidious-Anakin one is soooooooo funny, especially the Disciple and Visas ones (w00t)
Ioini Posted July 8, 2005 Posted July 8, 2005 Thank you jodo kast. I just make these up as I go along lol. Exile: *Takes a deep breath inside the Ebon Hawk. Then pukes* BAO-DUR! INSTALL THAT TOILET NOW!!! Bao-Dur: Why do people keep telling me that I look like Darth Maul? Female Exile: Hey Sion ever heard of a shower? --------- Nihilus: *Incompehesable sounds* Mace Windu: ENGLISH MOTHERF****ER DO YOU SPEAK IT?!
RevanRedefined Posted July 8, 2005 Posted July 8, 2005 Kreia: That crystal is bonded to you. Exile: Great, a pet crystal, here you take it. Kreia: I do not want it, it is bonded to you. Exile: I said take it! *chucks it at her*
jodo kast 5 Posted July 8, 2005 Posted July 8, 2005 Kreia: That crystal is bonded to you.Exile: Great, a pet crystal, here you take it. Kreia: I do not want it, it is bonded to you. Exile: I said take it! *chucks it at her* <{POST_SNAPBACK}> And gives her a concussion, and now She pisses her pants and forgets who she is every 5 minutes (w00t)
Ioini Posted July 8, 2005 Posted July 8, 2005 I can just see the headlines now.... SITH LORD DIES FROM HEAD TRUMA Exile: But it was an accident, I swear....
atomic Posted July 8, 2005 Posted July 8, 2005 Nihilus: *Incompehesable sounds* Mace Windu: ENGLISH MOTHERF****ER DO YOU SPEAK IT?! <{POST_SNAPBACK}> LOLOLOLOLO Nihilus: *Incomprehensable sounds* Mace Windu: Say that again, MOTHERF*****ER !!! I dare you !!! I double dare you !!! (w00t)
RevanRedefined Posted July 8, 2005 Posted July 8, 2005 And gives her a concussion, and now She pisses her pants and forgets who she is every 5 minutes (w00t) That or she becomes a vegetable. Exile: What do we do with her now? Atton: Unplug her, that's what she'd want. Thus the senate is drown in months of debate.
jodo kast 5 Posted July 8, 2005 Posted July 8, 2005 And gives her a concussion, and now She pisses her pants and forgets who she is every 5 minutes (w00t) That or she becomes a vegetable. Exile: What do we do with her now? Atton: Unplug her, that's what she'd want. Thus the senate is drown in months of debate. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> hahaha
darth spock Posted July 8, 2005 Posted July 8, 2005 And gives her a concussion, and now She pisses her pants and forgets who she is every 5 minutes (w00t) That or she becomes a vegetable. Exile: What do we do with her now? Atton: Unplug her, that's what she'd want. Thus the senate is drown in months of debate. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Fanfics: KotOR II: After the Credits Rolled: Read Force Sight: Read Other: Gaming Blog: Read
Sikon Posted July 9, 2005 Posted July 9, 2005 Kreia: I feel a disturbance in the Force... Atton: Shut up, you always feel it. Handmaiden: Exile is mine! We were sparring in underwear! Visas: No, he is mine! He prefers those who can't see him naked... Mira: Hey, you two, Exile is mine! I am the expert in picking males, remember? Kreia: [Force Persuade] You are all mistaken. You will give Exile to me. Suddenly, they all hear the voice of Exile, who is meditating in the next room. Exile: ...As my feet walk through the ashes of Malachor, I shall not love, for love is addiction, and addiction is a weakness... The wisdom of the Jedi Code shall guide me, and I shall follow these absolute truths - there is no emotion, there is peace... *Handmaiden, Visas and Mira start crying, influence drops to 0*
jodo kast 5 Posted July 9, 2005 Posted July 9, 2005 Kreia: I feel a disturbance in the Force...Atton: Shut up, you always feel it. Handmaiden: Exile is mine! We were sparring in underwear! Visas: No, he is mine! He prefers those who can't see him naked... Mira: Hey, you two, Exile is mine! I am the expert in picking males, remember? Kreia: [Force Persuade] You are all mistaken. You will give Exile to me. Suddenly, they all hear the voice of Exile, who is meditating in the next room. Exile: ...As my feet walk through the ashes of Malachor, I shall not love, for love is addiction, and addiction is a weakness... The wisdom of the Jedi Code shall guide me, and I shall follow these absolute truths - there is no emotion, there is peace... *Handmaiden, Visas and Mira start crying, influence drops to 0* <{POST_SNAPBACK}> NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!*takes deep breath* NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!
Calax Posted July 9, 2005 Posted July 9, 2005 Disiple:You've left me an opening.... Various enemy: Huh? oh SWEET JEDI MOTHER OF SITH!!!!!!!!!!! WHY WHY MUST YOU DO THIS!? WHY??????????? later Disple: whistles Varios enemy: I feel Violated......... Can sombody hug me other than Him........ I know i posted somthing similar in another thread, this just seems the be the right place for it. Victor of the 5 year fan fic competition! Kevin Butler will awesome your face off.
Ioini Posted July 9, 2005 Posted July 9, 2005 Handmaiden: He's not yours he said I was beautiful! Visas: He said I look sexy! Mira: How can you look sexy in THAT? Visa: Shut up Mira, always with the attitude. Mira: ME? You have serious issues as well, being submissive and all, just doesn't cut it. Handmaiden: We all know he loves me and let's just leave it at that. Mira: Oh no that doesn't end that way sister. *Exile boards the ebon hawk after a brief talk with the shopkeeper and finds that the three woman are on top each other stragging each other* Exile: Hey.....ladies. Ladies: Hi handsome! Atton: It's you're problem not mine.
Darth_Schmarth Posted July 9, 2005 Posted July 9, 2005 Disiple:You've left me an opening....Various enemy: Huh? oh SWEET JEDI MOTHER OF SITH!!!!!!!!!!! WHY WHY MUST YOU DO THIS!? WHY??????????? later Disple: whistles Varios enemy: I feel Violated......... Can sombody hug me other than Him........ I know i posted somthing similar in another thread, this just seems the be the right place for it. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Why, to test if it suddenly had become funny? ^Asinus asinorum in saecula saeculorum
Calax Posted July 10, 2005 Posted July 10, 2005 not really I'm just evil that way Victor of the 5 year fan fic competition! Kevin Butler will awesome your face off.
jodo kast 5 Posted July 10, 2005 Posted July 10, 2005 Handmaiden: He's not yours he said I was beautiful! Visas: He said I look sexy! Mira: How can you look sexy in THAT? Visa: Shut up Mira, always with the attitude. Mira: ME? You have serious issues as well, being submissive and all, just doesn't cut it. Handmaiden: We all know he loves me and let's just leave it at that. Mira: Oh no that doesn't end that way sister. *Exile boards the ebon hawk after a brief talk with the shopkeeper and finds that the three woman are on top each other stragging each other* Exile: Hey.....ladies. Ladies: Hi handsome! Atton: It's you're problem not mine. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> I love it!
E_Motion Posted July 10, 2005 Posted July 10, 2005 Exile: "Kreia, I need an answer. Are you Handmaiden's Mum?" Kreia: "You know the answer. You've always known." Exile: "Huh??" Kreia: "Mommies protect their little ones." Exile: "Huh??" Kreia: "Who did Mommy protect on Peragus?" Exile: "No!" Kreia: "Who did Mommy save from the mean old Jedi Council?" Exile: "Noooooooooo!" Kreia: "Give Mommy some sugar." ***************************** *****************************
darth spock Posted July 10, 2005 Posted July 10, 2005 Exile: Where's Disciple? We've gotta get going. Atton: He said he was going to a cantina. Exile: [laughs] Him? A cantina?! Atton: No. He said it was a gay bar. Disciple: The Exile said that I am nice. Atton: Well she told me that I was manly. Disciple: You're nothing but a scoundrel nerf-herder Han Solo wannabe! Atton: ...well at least I've gotten my teeth fixed. Disciple: Mommy TOLD me to wear the headgear! [cries] Atton: And I've got that messed-up guy personality that all chicks dig. Disciple: Well I am Prince Charming! Atton: No WAY. Besides, I've got the ride. All you've got is a bed in the medbay. Disciple: I can get a ship. Atton: And I've got an awesome jacket. Disciple: I can get a jacket. Atton: Just don't take Carth Onasi's. That orange thing is just ugly. Disciple: I'll order one in rainbows!! Atton: ... you sure you're in love with the Exile, or did the writers just make a slip-up? Fanfics: KotOR II: After the Credits Rolled: Read Force Sight: Read Other: Gaming Blog: Read
Jediphile Posted July 10, 2005 Posted July 10, 2005 Exile: "Kreia, I need an answer. Are you Handmaiden's Mum?" Kreia: "You know the answer. You've always known." Exile: "Huh??" Kreia: "Mommies protect their little ones." Exile: "Huh??" Kreia: "Who did Mommy protect on Peragus?" Exile: "No!" Kreia: "Who did Mommy save from the mean old Jedi Council?" Exile: "Noooooooooo!" Kreia: "Give Mommy some sugar." ***************************** ***************************** <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Fun... An alternative: Exile: "Kreia, are you Handmaiden's mother?" Kreia: "I could tell you, but you would be weakened from it - such answers you must discover yourself. And you'll make the Handmaiden weaker too, if you discover the answer for her..." Exile: "Okay, that's it - I've had it with all the cryptic mumbo-mumbo! Now give me a simple yes or no already - are you her mother or not? I WANT THE TRUTH!!" Kreia: "YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!!!" -- Okay, that was a cheap shot - my bad :"> " :D Visit my KotOR blog at Deadly Forums.
Sikon Posted July 10, 2005 Posted July 10, 2005 Exile is looking at himself in a mirror, shaving, brushing teeth, then adjusting his tie... Atton: ...Anyway, why Visas? She's blind, she wears that silly robe so you can't even see her legs, and she refused to dance for Vogga... Exile: Shh! Here she comes, a goddess indescribable in her divine beauty, so perfect that I'm afraid to even turn my eyes on her... [Visas disappears behind a corner] Exile: Did she look at me? Atton: No. Exile: Noooooooooo!!! Atton: She's blind, I told you. Disciple [to male Exile]: For the last time, I won't marry you... [Audience cracks up] Disciple: [stands up and looks into the camera] What? You! Just because I'm such a pretty-looking blonde young man with an innocent face... [Audience cracks up once again] Disciple: ...doesn't mean I'm a gay! [Audience cannot stop laughing, Atton stops looking through the keyhole and rolls on the floor laughing] Disciple: And just because I have these big healthy white teeth doesn't mean I'm funny, too! You're all just jealous! [Kreia stops meditating and starts dying of laughter] Disciple: You are no better than Handmaiden and Mira! I can show you a recording of what they do when they lock in that storage room... [Everyone stops laughing and pretends to be deaf] Disciple [to Exile]: So, for the last time, I will not marry you! And since it was you who dragged me to the Ebon Hawk and proposed it, I suggest you to ask Bao-Dur instead. At least he's horny. (I know these ones are lame, but I felt compelled to answer to those Visas-lovers and Disciple-haters.)
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