BicycleOfDeath

Been listening to the new A Day to Remember album as well as Sea of Treachery's new album. Sea of Treachery's "Welcome to Wonderland"s cover art reminds me a lot of Fallout: New Vegas.

I just started playing NV a couple weeks ago. I'm rarely home to play it on my PS3. I started a male character that's focus is 'thief' type gameplay with explosives. Notable Stats are: Perception, Intelligence, Agility, Luck It's fun kiting enemies around into a room filled with mines. I'm trying not to use any sort of firearm/energy weapon. I don't have too many points in melee, but it's what I use to finish off weakened opponents. My character is also very diplomatic. For some reason, I always take the Lady Killer talent even though I mostly think it's useless.

Not anymore than it makes me a Minnesota Wild fan because they're closer to my hometown than the Detroit Redwings or Chicago Blackhawks.

After consideration, we're giving it a round 2. I'm not entirely sure I agree with the reasons besides the fact that she's genuinely hurt by what she did. She was never very ... open about her thoughts and feelings which was an issue and with this it's actually a breathe of fresh air with how expressive she is. With all things considered, she doesn't deserve another chance. I always seem to thrive and succeed at life more when I'm suffering like this, though. I'm a intense pessimist, though when it comes to situations like this I become the most optimistic, pessimistic hopeless romantic. What I mean by that is, I really don't believe it's going to work. Though, if I don't put any effort into it I won't know. I'd rather be miserable for trying than miserable scrapping everything when the proverbial stool hits the fan. The more I think about it, the more I know she's a 'grass is always greener' type of person. We talked about that and she now realizes it. With all of this doubt I have, I did all ready make my decision and now isn't the time for borderline flip-flopping and kcufing with emotions. I cheated once and it's never happened again. I was abusive once and it never happened again. Perhaps this is the wake-up call I need to stop being so angry at everything and shutting myself off from really enjoying life so this doesn't happened again. It's unlikely, but possible. While I'm not usually one for hope, I do believe that the greatest gift we bare is the possibility to change. And if it doesn't work I can go about being a self-loathing narcissist and wonder what the hell I'm doing wrong and get myself into another relationship where this'll happen. Try. Fail. Repeat. Eventually one of these loot drops will be epic. ;-)

I'm at my home in Duluth, MN between sleep and work again: Starbucks. Do we have any norther Minnesotans on this forum that are still active?

I posted this one search too early.

A word I use sometimes, I'm unsure of it's spelling but pretty sure of it's definition. I searched Dictionary.com and Thesaurus.com for about twenty minutes and I still can't find it. I was sure it was spelled exorbid/exorbidly which has a similar meaning to drastic, dramatic, intense, fanatic, deep, etc. I can't seem to find the correct spelling of it and I began to wonder if the word even exists. I can't remember where I first learned of the word but I've been using it for years and people have always responded to it in the way I implied. Help me out?

My 'friends' are the type that have the response of 'Dude, that sucks.' Or there are the girls that say "You're a great guy. You deserve a lot better. Blah blah blah." Just all of that 'make a person feel better rehash' crap. On a decent note, I've met some very enjoyable pen-pal type ladies on Okcupid.com. At the same time, my ex has been coming intuitively clean and open about her thought processes. I've taken the time to listen to what she has to say and I'm a bit surprised that she cut that dude entirely out of her life (well, right now anyway) including a statement from her cellphone provider of his number being blocked. I was not expecting this what so ever. I'm not asking for advice. Though, I am curious as to other perspectives on the matter.

A human, elf and dwarf walk into a bar. They all order ale. The barkeep pours three mugs and sets them on the bar. There's a fly in every one of the mugs. The human just brushes it out. The elf looks at it in disgust and reorders some wine. The dwarf scoffs, grabs the fly by the wings screaming "Spit it out ye' li'l bastard! That's my ale ye' be stealin'!"

I'm cleaning up my house. Packing and getting ready for another five days of bumming it in Duluth. I installed Baldur's Gate II: Throne of Bhaal on my laptop. Hopefully that helps.

Perhaps all of our trials are with females with the same mindsets? My narcissism told me that I'm not the problem, she is.

All Im saying is that you've had 20-something years of being miserable and "elite" and you see how thats worked out for you, perhaps a shift in your philosophy would be more beneficial? To steal Wals idea, Einstein's quote: "Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." Touch

I'm not sure if it's letters, it's more of like typing into a journal or diary ... then I just never save the entry (Thanks OpenOffice!) Maybe I should start saving them.

Not to speak for Joe, but I doubt there was a specific reason. My wife and I have arguments where I get so angry I end up slamming my fists down on counters. Sometimes I literally shake with rage. Now I've never really been close to hitting her, I don't think I could ever forgive myself if I did that, but I imagine very few married couples don't hit that frustration level at times. The crazy part is the actual point of the argument is rarely as important as the total breakdown of reasonable communication skills. My wife was the first person I told about being raped at age 13 by my friend's alcoholic father. She was making fun of me for it in an argument. I'm not going to repeat what she said so don't bother.

My advice to you would be either to become more open about your straight edge views (maybe influencing them into finding a balance) or try to compromise a bit with them. After all relationships are give and take. Won't be easy, but keep your fingers crossed. The funny thing is, in all of my relationships I've been compromising and open. The one I actually had the most 'success' in was my marriage and I was a complete **** and not myself. As for my convictions, I won't be flexible with them. However, none of it them are requirements for my significant other. Though, as every relationship fails, I wonder if they'd be better off as requirements.

Woke up after sleeping in a bed. Just made some hot chocolate.

Well the problem with me is that a lot of my values and interests conflict with each other. I'm heavy on moral values but I'm an atheist. I don't drink or do drugs, but at metal shows that usually all you. Or, you see Straight Edgers (the 'title of the 'straight arrow' subculture that I follow but don't really 'claim it) that are flat out rude, militant and disrespectful. Where as my elitism is entirely a personal confliction. Also, the 'straight edge' girls are usually only into it until they're 21 or just because some dude she likes is. I can't stand not being in control of my actions at all times (I'm sure others would appreciate that, too, if they found out what a violent drunk I am). But I also think it's a bi-product of being a child of Wisconsin where getting completely wasted is an acceptable daily thing. With everything I've been through to get to this point I know I've 'risen above' it and that's where the elitism comes in. When I go out to bars with friends and just see the fact that they literally need to get wasted to have a good time just pisses me off. I've known girls that have had sex and regretted it, or even raped ... and just pass it off as they were drunk. This is a common mentality here and it's difficult to find what I'm looking for. Granted I could move to the east or west coast where things are a little less severe (not that it doesn't happen, but trust me, it's more intense here. Look up statistics of Wisconsin's drinking habits...). BUT, the town I live is a fantastic central hub for bike riding. Great country roads for riding my fixed gear road bike. A few dozen skateparks are within a two hour drive in any direction. The record store I shop at is located in my hometown. It seems as if the only thing I can't find here is a decent, compatible woman ... or a friend to hang out with. After many nights of making gaming night plans and being ditched for the bars with no notice, it gets frustrating. So, anyone have any suggestions on things I could try to meat someone who will eventually be the one that got away? Keep in mind, I work for the Railroad and am away from home 85% of the time in changing locations and hours that switch often.

@Orogun01: It's a shame when a person has to make a direct choice that conflicts with two highly regarded interests. For one, she aided you out of a mindset that's difficult to evolve out of. But then again, to keep from relapsing, your move makes sense. You may not want it, or even need it, but you certain do have my sympathy for having to make that choice. You also have my respect for having the perspective you have on it.

I envy you. I don't know if that's sarcasm or sincerity so I will say this. It's quite nice knowing someone for exactly who you are and has experienced every bit of, including to how your emotions and thought processes work. Autumn (my ex-wife), is actually kind of like an Atheist's version of a guardian angel/therapist. I can tell her absolutely everything and I don't need to explain anything cause she all ready knows how I'm perceiving the situation. She's also brutally honest with me. In fact, today, she was talking with me and how my elitism gets in the way of my relationships but also she stood my ground with me in my current situation w/ my ex-g/f's infidelity. Though, she didn't really offer advice, she has a way of talking with me, specifically, in a way that I answer my own questions. She just helps me get there in a very honest fashion. She's not afraid to call me out on anything which is a huge plus. The only detail of my relationship with her now that I dislike is the fact that her husband is afraid of us hanging out. He believes that we'll rekindle our lost fire. (Bwah ha ha ha! We're not attracted to each other in that way at all. We're even grossed out by sexual comments towards each other, it's ridiculous). She's a person I'd love to just sit down with for a couple hours over some hot beverages at a coffee shop and just bull****. Though, in respect of her, her happiness, and her relationship, I will not press the issue. He treats her very well and in that aspect, he deserves his paranoias to be respected. All though, Autumn tries to push my buttons sometimes. For those of you that don't know, I stand very hard on my convictions of being drug/alcohol free and obstaining from promiscuity. She tries to break my will-power on the promiscuity part. I think she's convinced it'll aid me in diminishing my elitism (which is a problem in my relationships). The current 'breaker' is I'm going to a metal show in the Twin Cities with this girl that's a pretty fitting match for me. She's taken and I don't press any issues with ladies that are in relationships. We also spending the night at her friend's house there (who has a huge, for the lack of a better work, crush on me). Her friend is also dating someone, but girl one's, Jess, boyfriend isn't coming. I made sure it was cool with him that her and I go. Autumn's like, "Joe, you should be the mayonaise in a Jess & Ife (the girl's house we're staying at, She's Swedish/Nigerian) sandwhich." But for moral and health reasons, threesomes are not anything that I have an appetite or fantasy for. Which Autumn doesn't get because of her arguement "Joe, you wouldn't have a problem with taking human life or hitting your wife. But you won't bone two hot bitches at once. Duh! Dudes fantasy!" El Oh El

Don't get me started on corrupt game saves...

My ex-wife and I got divorced. Granted it's the only relationship that either of us have ever cheated in. She's the only woman I ever hit. We were married for five years. The relationship had extremely high points as well and extremely low points (record lows for the both of us). We separated twice. We moved out of state for a change and hopefully work things out. It worked, for a bit. We talked about it over the last year and a half of our relationship and realized that we were just really great friends/vent friends that were trying to force something that just wouldn't work. Hence why both of us cheated and the emotional rollercoaster. An outsider may not agree, but we both gave it our all. Our heart and soul, 100%, including the darkest sides of each. We ended up getting divorced two years ago. She's still the best friend I've ever had. That relationship was also the craziest. Neither of us really hated each other. We just weren't getting what we wanted out of it and tried to make it something it wasn't. We tell people about our relationship and they ask "Why are you two even still talking?! That's horrible? How could you hit her? How could you two cheat on each other?!" The funny part is, we both agree that the most memorable parts of our relationship were our experience with spicy food (when we first moved to Texas) followed by cunnilingus and the time I chased her in the bathroom with a knife cause I got sick of her nagging about something. I just grabbed it form the drawer, she ran into the bathroom and locked the door. I instantly set it back in the drawer and read the final book in "The War of the Spider Queen." She also threw a lamp at me before hand. Neither of us can remember what the truck we were fighting about. Kind of on par with 'the one that got away.' We both treat our significant other's like gold (well, and crap in that relationships case). The point being, she's now very happily remarried and I couldn't be happier for her. Me on the other hand, my standards are so ridiculously high and my values are so niched that I can't seem to find anyone worth keeping. The scenario always ends up the same: I either get cheated on or dumped because of my lack of consumption of alcohol. Now with me working on the railroad, I don't know one girl that's going to want to put up with my work schedule and actually stay together. It's a problem because I'm a very dedicated one woman man.

A train derailed yesterday in Duluth, MN. I spent my night cleaning that up and repairing the track. It was great. Can't sleep. Work tonight. Leave back home @ 4:30am. I might actually ask to leave a bit early. Anyway, the derailment. What happened was is a newish train crew were heading North. There's a curve before the bridge. The cars were 'empty' limestone cars. By 'empty' I mean they were supposed to be but some limestone was left in because it was frozen. It was frozen on the side of the car that was on the outside of the curve. Train went around the corner, and because of the weight distrobution, quite a few cars derailed. Two of them completely disconnected and went off of the bridge. There's a road down below, but the cars didn't land on that part. I was part of the crew that had to replace the rail that was destroyed in the process. Lets just say it's one of those things that everything went wrong. We ended up replacing the rail twice. The bridge is going to need a complete overhaul because the car wheels dug into the ties on the bridge. I have pictures, but they're pretty pixelled due to the low light conditions and it was from my phone. They're on my Facebook and you can also just do a web search of "Train Derailment Duluth, MN".

I have a question about that. How are they plowing the roads with all of those abandoned cars sitting there? I have ideas, I just don't know how they're actually accomplishing it. Then again, I didn't really look into it. I was thinking about it last night before I fell asleep.

The one year I actually went deer hunting, I shot one from a distance. It instantly dropped. I walked up to it to see where I hit it. It started kicking around and I dropped my gun in the snow. Since I wanted to put the animal out of it's misery (I ended up spining it in the middle of the back) and didn't want to fire a weapon that potentially had snow in the barrel; I grabbed my knife and cut through the jugular. I will say this: anybody who says it's painless or only lasts a moment has never witnessed it. I cut it deep and there was a megaton load of bloodletting. It seemed to last forever. The animal made horrific noises and continued kicking even more vigorously. I don't know how long it lasted but even a glimpse of that was too long and too much. Throat slitting is by no means humane. It's not like the movies where you paper cut someone on the neck with a knife and they just keel over clenching their throat with their hands and just die. It's very unpleasant.

@Walsingham/Nepenthe: Oh hell, I didn't mean to make you all 'Hail to the King' of 'Woe is me' at the moment. By all means, if you have something you need to vent about, do it. It keeps me front ... unconventional stress relief.