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Posted

Once I finish my Tremere game(Hallowbrook and Kuei-Jin to go!), I'll have to start as a Malk. And Toreador, just to try Celerity at least once.

kirottu said:
I was raised by polar bears. I had to fight against blood thirsty wolves and rabid penguins to get my food. Those who were too weak to survive were sent to Sweden.

 

It has made me the man I am today. A man who craves furry hentai.

So let us go and embrace the rustling smells of unseen worlds

Posted

Currently replaying Oblivion. Probably the greatest game of all time next to Fallout 3.

 

My character is pretty stealth-focused, with skills in Sneak, Security, Light Armour, Blade, and a couple other ones I forget. My goal in this game is to join the Thieves Guild and the Dark Brotherhood. I've known for quite some time that I need to kill an innocent to get into the latter, but so far I haven't found anyone worthy enough (until today!). There's a few snotty NPCs I considered slaughtering in their sleep, but I knew I wouldn't get much satisfaction in that. So I went on a journey. If I was to become a murderer, I wanted my act to mean something. I wanted it to be symbolic. After a while of having nothing to Hades off to, it became apparent to me that Oblivion suffers from a terrible lack of attractive female NPCs. So I promised myself that the moment I met one, she would be my mark, my tribute to the Dark Brotherhood.

 

I found her in Burma. For many days I watched her. Each morning I would enter the inn, take a seat, and enjoy some breakfast. Whenever I felt brave enough, I would look away from my companion and take a peek at her. She was quite social, my Lyra. Like a little butterfly, hovering from table to table and exchanging the latest news. For instance, did you know that the Fighters Guild was recruiting? I didn't, until I met Lyra.

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I only spoke to her once, the last day of her life. She didn't seem to like me very much. I gave her a lot of money, and then she liked me more. Her smile made me happy - but was she only smiling because I had lined her pockets with gold? If so, she was a prostitute. My heart was broken. I made a decision that the **** would die that very night.

 

I stepped outside into the cold, frosty air and loitered around for a few hours. When nightfall finally came, I stole away to the stables and quickly retrieved my horse. If something went wrong, I would need a quick exit. I tied Glueboy to a tree just outside the city walls and went back inside. Lyra was still at work and her door was locked. I considered breaking in and waiting in a closet, but something told me that was the wrong way to go about things.

 

Late in the evening, my darling Lyra finally left the inn and went home. I followed. I waited for an hour or two, not wanting to catch her undressing or within earshot of my breakin. The undressing would come later.

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Five lockpicks later, I was inside. Her house was immaculate, just like her. I crept around the first floor and took a flowerpot. I decided I would put it on her grave. I listened to the ringing from the church down the road. It was midnight. In the gloom of her house, I sat down and ate her leftovers. After I was done, I snuck upstairs and found her sleeping on the grandest bed I had seen to that point.

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She was beautiful. I stripped off my clothing and sat down across from her, mesmerized by the delicate movement of her bosom as she breathed her last breaths. After a little while I began to lose track of time. Before long, she began to stir. Realzing this was my chance, I removed my dagger and struck her with it. How she fought! She staggered to the bottom of the stairs and ran toward the front door. I couldn't have that! I drained her stamina with my Greater Power and she fell to the ground. Moments later she was dead.

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Beside myself with passion, I began to undress her, exposing long, regal limbs. After making love to her, I thought she felt a little cold. Trying to warm her up, I dragged her body to the fireplace.

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And then I ate her.

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(Approved by Fio, so feel free to use it)

Posted

Jerkface does it again!

kirottu said:
I was raised by polar bears. I had to fight against blood thirsty wolves and rabid penguins to get my food. Those who were too weak to survive were sent to Sweden.

 

It has made me the man I am today. A man who craves furry hentai.

So let us go and embrace the rustling smells of unseen worlds

Posted
:snip:

 

Nice job copying and pasting much, if not all, of that post! 8)

"Geez. It's like we lost some sort of bet and ended up saddled with a bunch of terrible new posters on this forum."

-Hurlshot

 

 

Posted

It's wierd - so far everyone I know, who has Oblivion, has gone pretty psycho ingame - at least once..

 

I think this game is an agent of chaos and evil...

 

Or maybe any game where you can stalk someone, break into their house - undress them and ragdoll the body around - is a game that "enhances" the inherent psychotic impulses in everyone.

Fortune favors the bald.

Posted

Oblivion Rocks!

Make sure to add mods if your interested, something that levels yoru enemies is a must if you plan on exploring every nook and cranny. I loved this game too! 8)

Posted (edited)

Once, in Oblivion, i tried to to roleplay as a homosexual redguard.

 

My "Anders" didn't discriminate anyone, and even offered love to orcs, kajiits and argonians. But to no avail, my little Anders was destined to solitude by this sexist game. Why can you wage war, but not make love? "Why? oh why?", my little Anders cried. His sadness was an endless void, never satisfied. This void turned into a maelstrom of hatred of everything and everyone.

 

My little Anders was changed. "Why should i help Martin?", he thought. "Why should i help this forsaken Tamriel, where war is eternal, and love equally neglected for aeons?". "No", he declared. "If death is the only truth of this world, then i shall abide by it; No.....rather REVEL in it!".

 

So he murdered everyone that have denied him love, warmth and affection, committed acts on their dead bodies that would make a Mehrunes Dagon blush like a catholic nun, and offered them as sacrifice to the great Hemaeus Mora.

 

My little Anders had finally grown up, gained wisdom and sought to understand on the art of murder. He found an answer within a brotherhood of fellows that were at least as dark as he was. After some killing, raping and general good 'ole fun, he won the approval of the night mother herself.

 

I heard that he is still out there in Oblivion, trying to destroy the very game that created him. Oh, my little Anders how your persistance is admirable, beating down Martin to a bloody pulp, only to have him ressurected again.

 

Maybe some day you will succeed, maybe not. At least it is done in the name of love, i guess, or because of it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This was created, and written during my coffeebreak.

Edited by Meshugger

"Some men see things as they are and say why?"
"I dream things that never were and say why not?"
- George Bernard Shaw

"Hope in reality is the worst of all evils because it prolongs the torments of man."
- Friedrich Nietzsche

 

"The amount of energy necessary to refute bull**** is an order of magnitude bigger than to produce it."

- Some guy 

Posted

thelakeuv7.jpg

Soul Reaver 2. I can finally forget early 3D graphics of SR like a bad dream.

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Posted

no u

 

Soul Reaver 2 is my fave of the series. Though the metroid-model of the game's weapons was a bit of a dreg.

kirottu said:
I was raised by polar bears. I had to fight against blood thirsty wolves and rabid penguins to get my food. Those who were too weak to survive were sent to Sweden.

 

It has made me the man I am today. A man who craves furry hentai.

So let us go and embrace the rustling smells of unseen worlds

Posted
Good then that the series died.

Hell noez. I still hope to see this and this one day.

The last LoK game (Defiance?) was an alltime low in the series.

Blood Omen 2 was worse, not by much, but worse. That said, they still were decent to good games, for such is the power of the LoK license.

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Posted
Funny, I thought BO2 was the best in the series, thanks to the dark and gritty feeling to it.

While BO 2 had great art direction (let's forget about scantily clad vampire chicks for a moment), its puzzles were way too easy. Another problem was the combat system: only the opponent you targeted actually attacked you, and the rest were just watching. Defiance was better on both accounts.

 

SR series was too colourful. Bleh.

The first SR was post-apoc. It was so grey that it made Gears of War look like Uncharted.

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Posted

Hah! You got a picture of that? We were only playing on normal too. If you hadn't been thrown off the roof by that Tank you would have been fine. The other guy got swarmed by Zombies and Bill went to save him while I ran for the copter. I got there and had about 2 seconds to watch the red outline before he went down and the copter left.

Posted

I still remember the combat music there, bless Kurt Harland.

kirottu said:
I was raised by polar bears. I had to fight against blood thirsty wolves and rabid penguins to get my food. Those who were too weak to survive were sent to Sweden.

 

It has made me the man I am today. A man who craves furry hentai.

So let us go and embrace the rustling smells of unseen worlds

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