Walsingham

I would object that you can't do any proper work on an ipad, but of course MEPs don't do any proper work.

@gorth: actually, using his 100xp he applied the +1 toughness from his career path and now has toughness 7, which is equivalent to a giant or jabberwock @Oner: I like this. But I think it needs developing. I've decided that the girl who was killed was a daughter from a noble house. She was sent into the mountains to live with the realtives of a feudal retainer in order to protect her from enemies. BUt the enemies are not officially her enemies. Possibly a more ruthless branch of the same family? Her father's/mother's side? I can picture a band of horsemen turning up with a captain of the house at their head, demanding the girl. The locals will all say she's dead but of course the body will have been burned by the goblins in House 1. So they won't get any 'satisfactory' answers and will haul the PCs back for prolonged questioning. The dwarf's mates won't like this when they find out but they're going to be busy with a goblin invasion.

I also agree with Slowtrain, I think. Should gamers really care if the mainstream doesn't like them? No, not really. The mainstream is too busy watching Oprah and shovelling cheesy fries into their gaping maws to anything except hop around and wave their mental arms periodically. They haven't the time and attention to travel into alternative worlds and shoot the natives, solve puzzles, roleplay, stare at CGI boobies. etc. Now of course there's going to be tension, because the manufacturers want as large an appeal as possible. So they try whenever possible to mainstream gaming. But IMO it will NEVER happen.

The main theme from Star Wars.

I'm going to take issue with this because it's relevant to a discussion about what to do with North Korea. And the issue I am going to take is how positively disgusting it is to assert that some nations are just not able to cope with democracy. Because to me that sounds like "Bloody wogs don't know what's good for 'em. Only thing Johnny [Turk/Afghan/Arab/German] understands is force." Is that really what you are saying? As for being better off with ol' Saddam, you surely can't be serious.

Cool! I need some ideas for a plot involving at least two noble houses. What are they trying to achieve? What with? Ideas for characters, you get the picture. Next session will probably be on Thursday.

So true!

I agree with Pop and would simply add that the only thing worse than gamers is non-gamers.

Thanks, Tigs. I was getting a bit discouraged by the quiet. Blue: 1 dwarf PC, helmet, warhammer, no other armour, toughness 4 1 human beggar, stout stick, and quite quickly a short bow which he "felt strongly he knew how to use", no armour at all besides his ludicrous toughness of 6 (human standard is 3) 1 NPC youth with a bow and a passion for fighting; demonstrated by two consecutive leadership crit successes which I took as a sign he'd be playing a strong role 4 NPC bowmen/boys with strength 3 bows 4 (quite understandably) nervous NPC men/boys with sticks/billhooks/farming tools - used as standard weapons under the rules Assorted noncombatants Red: 26 lesser goblins 4 energetic and motivated lesser goblins All armed with an assortment of poorly made melee weapons, no effective armour, and a smattering of bows Terrain: I'm not going to draw a map, just yet. I'm not in the mood. Maybe later, if my explanation is incomprehensible. The village of Jarrada sits at the bottom of a shallow east-west valley, straddling a 2-6 foot wide mountain stream. It is six hours walk to the dwarfhold through thick woods, and two days walk downhill to the nearest larger village. The slope runs east-west at a gentle incline at this point. The southern side of the valley consists of deep woodland, turning to apple orchards. It is from this direction that the goblins are coming. There are three buildings on the south side. One (at the northern end) building [House 1] belongs to the girl, Lyssandre, who was murdered and for both scene-setting and story purposes it is important to emphasise the small capering figures burning and trashing the building. The dancing fiery light from this burning building will serve to illuminate the action. There are also two watchfires lit on the south bank, although they will burn down slower. The other two buildings belong [House 2/3] to the same family and are in close proximity, about half way down the village, and some 15 feet from the stream. Close to the south of them are a number of stone and wood kraals which the local goatherds use on occasion. Although there are no goats in them at present. The stream itself is too wide and fast flowing for the goblins to cross at will, while humans could have jumped it with a dexterity check (but never did). There are, however, two fording points. One is almost dead centr of the village, opposite house 2. This is only 2 foot wide, and is easy for humans. The lesser goblins must make leadership tests to jump it, combining fear of the jump with fear of humans. The other ford, which was rarely used, but important for spreading the threat, is a wider shallower one used by livestock, some twenty feet west of the thin ford. Upstream of these points the river is wide (6 foot) and deep. Below these points the river becomes much faster flowing as the ground drops away. Immediately on the north bank is house 4, which is some ten feet east of the thin ford. It is a relatively small house. Directly north of that house is the large and low house 5. To the east of both next to the road is a communal stone winery where they make and store wines and cider. It is a strong building, made of cridely dressed stone, but without windows. Only a very large double wooden door. The biggest house is at the western edge of the village, and is built around a much older single story square stone tower. This is house 6, and in our game it's where the villagers very quickly assembled, having eaten there earlier in the evening. All the houses in the villlage consist in the main of cemented stone foundations (dwarven know-how) to a height of two-three feet, topped by timber frame and wattle and daub. The roofs are thatched, but at the end of winter they are very damp, if threadbare in places. North of the village, the slopes are long rows of bare grape vines. The night is not moonlit, but running away in that direction won't be easy. Blue Behaviour: If left to their own devices the Blue NPCs will tend to try and lock themselves indoors, firing bows from the windows until they exhaust their ammunition. Various noncombatants have hidden themselves in their own houses and will expose this fact at inopportune moments. However, the PCs have the option of suggesting short orders with a leadership check. On several occasions the PCs missed a vital move, like counter-attacking a bridge head by the goblins, and I rolled leadership checks for the villagers. In our game they failed uniformly. (Leadership 33) The villager NPCs have no great plan, but they will resist any attempt to get them to leave the village. This is actually common sense, as any retreat through darkened woods would turn into a massacre. Our dwarven PC actually wanted this so he could escape under cover of the massacre. Fortunately for our kind villagers he failed these leadership tests. Conversely when he told them to act sensibly he always passed! Red Behaviour: The goblins vastly outnumber the players, and have the advantage of movement, and concealment in the shifting darkness. Every round any Blue are exposed they will receive a number of arrows fired at them, diminishing with goblin casualties. I stuck to 2-3. The goblin bows are strength 2. However, the goblins as a whole don't have much appetite for pressing an attack against the humans. Keep track of casualties of their numbers but the really important ones are the four keen goblins. It is these goblins that will attack by themselves or chivvying on their cowardly brethren. Kill all four and the remainder will be very very unlikely to continue. Not that the players will know this. They have identical crappy stats, but are assumed to want to fight unless something awful happens to them wounding wise. The goblins are not very savvy in general, but their options are really limited. They will cheerfully fire arrows across the river in skirmish fashion, and will probe the flanks along the river, to no avail. Their main aim is to get at all the frightened human non-combatants, torture and eat them. If things get too tough, though, they will certainly run back to their camp nearby. Tough in this context means losing all four keen goblins or more than half their original number. With no armour, and atughness of 2 this is quite plausible. One thing to keep firmly in mind is that goblins and dwarves are subject to hatred of each other. Our dwarf crit passed his cool check, and was able to maintain a level head. But the goblins didn't and sadly for the PCs this made them very much more determined to fight than normal. Even after the last keen goblin had been killed the remainder made one attempt en masse to force the ford. But our heroes made a show of face and hauled their badly wounded selves to the thin ford and - after killing three - the mob failed their leadership test and ran like hell. It was a pretty close run thing, with the dwarf sustaining a broken hand and reduced to a short knife. Daylight doesn't bother lesser goblins, but they will be knackered out by dawn and want to retreat to get some sleep. Tactical Note: The fight takes place on an overcast night, with plenty of fires. This wrecks most night vision. All information should come in via an initiative check. Major failures will mean the players get the wrong impression. Ditto for the goblins. Uncertainty about the flanks, the darkness, the crying and lamentation of the women, and the horrifying smell of cooked meat will compound the sense of desparation. However, with such amateurish forces at work, there will be definite pauses in the action throughout the night. Although at each point teh players shoudl have limited planning time before some new goblin move is spotted. Fire arrows (ineffective), bridging the stream etc. In our game it never came to a final fight, but the most sensible place to hole up is the short tower attached to house 6. Although there is only room for around eight to ten people in the tower, which makes it unfeasible at the outset. Result: Our dwarf PC attempted repeatedly to run away and leave the humans to their fate. But on each occasion, courtesy of the goblin dice throwing, he was thwarted. Taking the alternative he fought hard right at the ford, and was badly wounded early on by a sword to the groin. The villagers applied poultices, but he remained at just above critical until the final fight when he was critically injured in his hand. He issed several sensible commands which were obeyed, earning him a total of 130 xp along with the roleplaying. The beggar roleplayed excellently - including resisting the urge to probe his memory too far - and decided on balance to fight rather than run. He appropriated a bow from a dead villager, and a stout stick from a woodpile. With these he killed some 6 goblins. He earned a total of 100 xp. He was basically uninjured. After the goblins were seen off they waited to till morning and took everyone to the dwarf hold. The enws of goblins, so far from known settlements, shook everyone up badly. The clansire and his 1- strong bodyguard set off immediately on recconaissance, leaving 30 ish fighting dwarves behind. The PCs tried lying at first for no good reason, but the priest saw through the lies. On hearing their true story there was much hailing of them as stout fellows (muted by the titchiness of their opponents). Their wounds were dressed, and the broken fingers cured by magic. The dwarf received an iron gauntlet for his busted hand, and a mail shirt. The dwarves totally failed to understand what a beggar was, and decided on principle to give the beggar help anyway. They bathed him, trimmed his hair, got rid of the lice, and gave him a robe to use as a tunic a simple brown cloak, new shoes, a belt, and a heavy steel helmet. Their looted goblin kit was taken away politely but firmly and burned.

Epigenetics?

This reminds me. I realy must log onto to some Sudanese web forums later and tell them how many ****ing pies I've been eating.

Yes. It's because Ozzies are bloody savages.

Fair enough. Two quotes from the game Alpha Centauri:

You do realise that some sorts of 'magic' don't count. Particularly if you're talking to yourself.

Whilst there is a relation between genes and metabolism, IIRC there is no direct relation between genes and beer belly. Causes are most likely a combination of a slowdown of metabolism after age 40 and alcohol causing more consumption of food. That's not what the article says, if I understand it correctly.

Went out with friends for food and beer. Had guinness after reading it's officially good for you. Reduces risk of heart attack.

Fair do's.

-Did ya eva see a purple army ya git? -Err..no Boss? -'zactly. That's cuz purple makes ya ded sneaky! Orky no wotz. *nods sagely*

LOL so even the Chinese recognise that their true commie dingbat brethren are a lost cause. I can't help feeling for the ordinary North Korean tho. They've not had much say in anything for years.

Frozen beer steins and cold lager in the back garden. If there's anything fine than working under these conditions then I shall leave it for better men. My belly began a literally dazzling white and is now a fine redcoat red. My face was liberally treated with sunscreen so that is fine. For all the louche and lordly tone I got a great deal done today, including finances, post, phonecalls, and shopping. Now sweating healthily behind closed blinds. Will probablys et o work again later in the cool of the evening. Debating second lager.

Stage 2 You will recall that we ended the previous stage with the shock revelation that the beggar could not have murdered the girl because just minutes before they turend up another child disappeared with a scream. The beggar was then taken into the largest house in the village and propped up in a chair, while the dwarven PC and the men of the village argued about what to do next. The dwarf, seeing the better part of valour, argued successfully that he should stay put and look after the women folk. It is worth pointing out that his leadership stat was 49%. Meanwhile, the second PC was 'parachuted' into his character - that of the beggar! He was informed that he knew nothing of where he was, could not remember his name, age, origin, or even what language people were speaking. His character had been pre-rolled and to compensate for not having any choice I'd elected to give him +1 to toughness. With his randomly determined stats, plus his elective starting bonus his toughness was 6! This is a truly impressive toughness, equivalent to a normal human wearing felt, chainmail, and plate armour. His other personal stats were rather poor, and this tied in wonderfully with his true background - although I won't yet say what that is. The beggar ate, while the dwarf was lead across the stream to comfort one of the bereaved mothers. Three of the younger men went into the woods on the south side of the village and were immediately - but unbeknownst to the players - engaged in a fierce fight. It was only when the surviving two young men ran back towards teh village shouting that the alarm was really raised. Keep in mind that the time is just after midnight, and the villagers have lit several bonfires. When I have time later I will draw a map and describe the events of the ensuing battle.

lulwat? You protestations do you no credit, sir. You with all your pillow fighting lingerie models.

I for one want my DNA rewritten because apparently taking on a 'beer belly' is down to genes, not beer. http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/3175488.stm