Reconciling different perspectives on grieving

['GM']

I just checked:

 

- Denial

- Anger

- Bargaining

- Depression

- Acceptance

 

http://psychcentral.com/lib/the-5-stages-of-loss-and-grief/000617

 

 

You could have some awesome death-type social gatherings using that lot. I'd definitely be up for an anger party, where you burned effigies of cancer or the NHS or something.

 

Or you could have an auction to 'bring them back'. Proceeds to a charity.

The auction would be part of the 3rd stage of grief?

 

But of that list, for me the denial part was something that sort of remained even through to the acceptance part. Like, you know the person is gone, you know you'll never see that person again, yet it is still hard to believe, especially if you find yourself in a place that in the past you always saw that person.

 

Don't really remember getting angry so much, just downright sad.

[Lexx]

You can use the same stuff for a lost love too, even if it's quite a different topic. Me, personally, I am currently in the phase of depression.

Edited September 9, 2013 by Lexx

[alanschu]

 

 

If you don't mind, what happened to your brother?

 

I don't mind.

 

My brother was killed in a motorcycle accident in 1994 (I was 13).

[alanschu]

I just checked:

 

- Denial

- Anger

- Bargaining

- Depression

- Acceptance

 

http://psychcentral.com/lib/the-5-stages-of-loss-and-grief/000617

 

 

You could have some awesome death-type social gatherings using that lot. I'd definitely be up for an anger party, where you burned effigies of cancer or the NHS or something.

 

Or you could have an auction to 'bring them back'. Proceeds to a charity.

 

 

Yeah I hit those stages myself at two different points in my life (brother and a girl).  I found myself sliding around, rather than a state of progression.

[Walsingham]

It strikes me that there are parallels between this notion of a progression and 'drama' theories of negotiation. 

 

I wonder, therefore, if this similarity doesn't imply some tension between two parts of the mind during grief. They have to reach a negotiated accommodation in order to resolve the crisis.

[Nonek]

Commiserations Mr Schu.

 

I'm surprised that everybody's so emotionally mature, what's wrong with repressing everything, becoming monosyllabic and drinking heavily. Alternated with a spirited bit of violence on the rugger pitch and the comfort of good escapist passtimes, I find this is more than enough to get me through lifes interesting times.

 

Got to admit that I find Facebook and Twitter a touch distasteful, they seem a little vain and attention seeking, though that may be my generational bias talking. That and i'm too much of a boring old fart to contribute anything attention worthy.

[alanschu]

 

 

Got to admit that I find Facebook and Twitter a touch distasteful, they seem a little vain and attention seeking, though that may be my generational bias talking.

 

On some level it is. It's sharing the news that something unpleasant happened and am asking for support. Same with an internet forum

[alanschu]

Thanks to everyone for chiming in.  Prayer service happened today, which I was asked (and honored) to be a Paul Bearer for.  Same goes for the full funeral service tomorrow.

 

No real lasting rift between my Aunt and I, and once all this is over I will follow up with her to just let her know I didn't mean to come across as overly terse and understand that it was an emotional time for all involved.