Wisdom Teeth

[Aram]

Nobody ever took a chisel to my nostrils and I thankfully never pissed blood, but I think I've got you all beat by the sheer volume of **** that happened to me in a small amount of time.

 

I'd say I've been stabbed with a needle roughly a thousand times over the last two years, from simply drawing blood and recieving injections. I've recieved more than a hundred semi-permanent IV sites, one very painful pick line in my arm for about a week, and have had four separate Hickman lines installed on my chest--at one time I had two of them at once. A Hickman line, if you don't know, is a massive intravaneous catheter that looks sort of like a length of extension cord sticking out of your chest. It's held in place by stitches and the hole in your chest that it plugs in through constantly itches and weeps. I spent most of the last two years with one swinging around beneath my shirt and the scars they left behind would make you think someone blasted me with a shotgun. The best part is being wide awake while they're installed and then getting them yanked once you're done with them or they get infected. Yanking one out once you've had it a while is about is difficult as pulling a healthy tooth.

 

Apart from those the most painful procedure I've probably had is a bone marrow aspiration, which basically involves laying flat on your chest while a doctor makes an incision over your hip bone and then jams a needle that looks sort of like a drill bit into it so hard that it impacts the mattress underneath you. Then he starts twisting it in order to drill into your hip bone down to the marrow and all of the little nerves in there start going crazy. Most of the pain during one operation seemed to be concentrated in the middle toe of my right foot, strangely enough. I've had two of those, as well as three spinal taps, the last of which didn't seal up properly and leaked for three days, giving me a headache so bad that I was popping opiates like candy for the entire duration.

 

Over the course of the whole deal, I've had about a hundred fevers, some of them so bad I went completely delerious. I was extremely nauseous almost continuously for a year. My bowels stopped doing what they were supposed to one month so I spent most of it ****ting myself with squirts of green or red liquid. Still, easily the single worst part of the whole damn ordeal was being put on high-dose steroids, on and off, on and off, over and over, until my body came to accept the donor marrow. Rather than the fun muscle building kind of steroids, immuno-suppressive steroids pretty much dissolve any strong bones and muscles you have and replace them with a hundred or more pounds of retained water. You blow up like a water balloon, lose the strength to pick yourself up off the toilet, and start looking almost like you've got the innsmouth look. Your stomach burns and your whole body aches for as long as you're on them. They leave you so vulnerable to infection that you're afraid to touch anything or go outside, and they mess with your mind in an amazingly unfun sort of way. The last round of them I got had me hallucinating things attacking me from the ceiling and kept me from sleeping a minute for well over a month.

 

The scariest part was probably when some medication they had me on caused me to have a seizure. I was sitting down on the toilet one night and got up only to realize that all I could see was a strange mass of twinkly multicolored stars. I'd barely gotten back to my bed before a doctor realized what was about to happen and piled on top of me so I wouldn't kill myself thrashing about. The next thing I remember it was a week later and I felt the worst I ever have, ever.

 

I don't consider any one of these individual things particularly horrible or traumatic, but the fact that it has gone on, almost steadily, for about two years, and only just now finally seems to be resolved, makes it a lot more than a nightmare. It was a personal hell, physically and mentally, and looking back all I can think is that there really ought to be a better way.

[@\NightandtheShape/@]

I have no wisdom teeth!

 

Nobody ever took a chisel to my nostrils and I thankfully never pissed blood, but I think I've got you all beat by the sheer volume of **** that happened to me in a small amount of time.

 

I'd say I've been stabbed with a needle roughly a thousand times over the last two years, from simply drawing blood and recieving injections. I've recieved more than a hundred semi-permanent IV sites, one very painful pick line in my arm for about a week, and have had four separate Hickman lines installed on my chest--at one time I had two of them at once. A Hickman line, if you don't know, is a massive intravaneous catheter that looks sort of like a length of extension cord sticking out of your chest. It's held in place by stitches and the hole in your chest that it plugs in through constantly itches and weeps. I spent most of the last two years with one swinging around beneath my shirt and the scars they left behind would make you think someone blasted me with a shotgun. The best part is being wide awake while they're installed and then getting them yanked once you're done with them or they get infected. Yanking one out once you've had it a while is about is difficult as pulling a healthy tooth.

 

Apart from those the most painful procedure I've probably had is a bone marrow aspiration, which basically involves laying flat on your chest while a doctor makes an incision over your hip bone and then jams a needle that looks sort of like a drill bit into it so hard that it impacts the mattress underneath you. Then he starts twisting it in order to drill into your hip bone down to the marrow and all of the little nerves in there start going crazy. Most of the pain during one operation seemed to be concentrated in the middle toe of my right foot, strangely enough. I've had two of those, as well as three spinal taps, the last of which didn't seal up properly and leaked for three days, giving me a headache so bad that I was popping opiates like candy for the entire duration.

 

Over the course of the whole deal, I've had about a hundred fevers, some of them so bad I went completely delerious. I was extremely nauseous almost continuously for a year. My bowels stopped doing what they were supposed to one month so I spent most of it ****ting myself with squirts of green or red liquid. Still, easily the single worst part of the whole damn ordeal was being put on high-dose steroids, on and off, on and off, over and over, until my body came to accept the donor marrow. Rather than the fun muscle building kind of steroids, immuno-suppressive steroids pretty much dissolve any strong bones and muscles you have and replace them with a hundred or more pounds of retained water. You blow up like a water balloon, lose the strength to pick yourself up off the toilet, and start looking almost like you've got the innsmouth look. Your stomach burns and your whole body aches for as long as you're on them. They leave you so vulnerable to infection that you're afraid to touch anything or go outside, and they mess with your mind in an amazingly unfun sort of way. The last round of them I got had me hallucinating things attacking me from the ceiling and kept me from sleeping a minute for well over a month.

 

The scariest part was probably when some medication they had me on caused me to have a seizure. I was sitting down on the toilet one night and got up only to realize that all I could see was a strange mass of twinkly multicolored stars. I'd barely gotten back to my bed before a doctor realized what was about to happen and piled on top of me so I wouldn't kill myself thrashing about. The next thing I remember it was a week later and I felt the worst I ever have, ever.

 

I don't consider any one of these individual things particularly horrible or traumatic, but the fact that it has gone on, almost steadily, for about two years, and only just now finally seems to be resolved, makes it a lot more than a nightmare. It was a personal hell, physically and mentally, and looking back all I can think is that there really ought to be a better way.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

[mkreku]

Uhm.. I had a cold once..

 

NAAH, I CAN'T GO ON STAGE AFTER ARAM

[metadigital]

Aram, is that treatment for Leukaemia?

[Humodour]

They're going to check if I need my wisdom teeth removed when I am back home next. Likely verdict is a yes. FLAMFLAMFLAMFLAMing piece of FLAMFLAMFLAMFLAM.

[metadigital]

At least Australia has a decent dental system.

 

Also, it's best to get them out earlier, before the jaw solidifies into bone in the late twenties / early thirties.

[taks]

the last time i saw either a dentist or orthodontist was... well... when i got my wisdom teeth pulled 20+ years ago. i have been fortunate.

 

oh, the reason, btw, is that doctors in the late 60s early 70s handed out pencillin like candy every time a child ran a fever. this effects the development of your teeth. in some cases, such as with my two brothers, it made their teeth real soft and cavity prone. in others, such as with me, it caused an extra layer of calcium to be deposited on the teeth (literally, you can see it as splotches sort of).

 

of course, as a result, my teeth are very hard and sort of brittle which means i have a bunch of chips in them. they're still as sharp as they were when they came in and no cavities, ever, to boot. apparently people get cavities all the time, and normal saliva eventually kills off the bacteria. since i have extra protection, none of these "mini-cavities" ever make it into the danger zone requiring treatment.

 

at least, that's how the last dentist i visited it explained things...

 

taks

[metadigital]

I had flouride treatments up past the age of 25, which have helped turn my teeth into stone.

[taks]

granite chompers, eh?

 

they put so much flouride in our water in the US, plus daily brushing with flouride toothpaste (sometimes twice daily), it has the same effect.

 

taks

Edited January 4, 2007 by taks

[metadigital]

I don't recall the chemistry (and I'm too busy / lazy to look it up), but the calcium of the teeth turns into limestoney-type material (IIRC).

[taks]

yeah, i think i've heard that as well. i don't mind either way. i have a friend whos teeth have probably lost 1/3 of their length from abrasion. folks like you and i will not have to worry about that...

 

taks

[Rosbjerg]

teeth turning into limestone? that's sounds disturbing.. but it would explain why some people just don't get any cavities.. maybe my teeth are solid rocks by now..

[metadigital]

Well there has to be some benefit to getting old: the dentine darkens (which is why the teeth look browner/yellower; as the previously white dentine changes).

[taks]

yeah, my outer layer of calcium stands out against the remaining portion of my teeth worse now than ever. i no longer care (like i did when i was 16). if anyone were ever to ask "how do you feel about splotchy teeth" i'd respond with "how do you feel about needles injected directly into your gum and subsequent drilling on your teeth?"

 

taks

[Rosbjerg]

My teeth have always been a bit darker than everyone elses.. and I've never had a cavity in my life.. and here I thought I had super teeth or something.. ^_^

[Aram]

Aram, is that treatment for Leukaemia?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

I didn't have Leukemia, but the treatment is basically the same. I had aplastic anemia, which basically meant that my marrow stopped working for pretty much no good reason at all.

 

They wipe out your old marrow with a combination of a prewar poison and horse serum, which coincidentally destroys your immune system and makes all your hair fall out. They collect the donor's stem cells with a pheresis machine (they don't actually have to go straight to the source anymore), and give it to you through your IV while you're pretty much dead and living on transfusions of red blood cells, platlets, antibiotics, saline, and electrolites, which is why you need two giant catheters.

 

I got about three separate infections during this process, which made the whole thing far worse than it needed to be. Then I experienced three major flare ups of GVHD, which is apparently not unusual, and thus the need for steroids, which also caused a dozen more infections. It's not a happy process but it seems to be the best we've got.

[metadigital]

It's amazing how primitive a lot of medicine still is: using hardware like chisels and hammers and titanium frames to hold it all together.

[kumquatq3]

Aram, is that treatment for Leukaemia?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

I didn't have Leukemia, but the treatment is basically the same. I had aplastic anemia, which basically meant that my marrow stopped working for pretty much no good reason at all.

 

They wipe out your old marrow with a combination of a prewar poison and horse serum, which coincidentally destroys your immune system and makes all your hair fall out. They collect the donor's stem cells with a pheresis machine (they don't actually have to go straight to the source anymore), and give it to you through your IV while you're pretty much dead and living on transfusions of red blood cells, platlets, antibiotics, saline, and electrolites, which is why you need two giant catheters.

 

I got about three separate infections during this process, which made the whole thing far worse than it needed to be. Then I experienced three major flare ups of GVHD, which is apparently not unusual, and thus the need for steroids, which also caused a dozen more infections. It's not a happy process but it seems to be the best we've got.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

yea, um, ****. I think you "won".

[taks]

a friend of mine broke the same leg, in different places, twice this year. he came up to ski with me in march, hit a jump at breck but backed off right before he hit it and shot straight up, then straight back down on a table-top, shattering his knee and fibula/tibula. once he started walking again, he slipped in the kitchen and landed on the same knee, this time a compound fracture to his femur. the hardware from the first break prevented the flexibility of his leg from saving him the second time. lots of titanium in that guy now... hehe. he still swears he'll ski again next year, but he hasn't even walked without assistance in almost a year...

 

taks

Edited January 5, 2007 by taks

[Krookie]

I've dislocated my shoulder.

 

That's about it.

[Shryke]

i've dislocated the same shoulder about 7 times now...

 

went and saw a doctor about it after like the 4th time. apparently there's some operation i can get that will temporarily fix the problem...

 

i suppose i've been rather lucky though. i've never broken anything. just lots of dislocations, fractures, torn ligiments and stuff

 

nearly snapped my kneecap in half. that was kinda painful. was all swollen up and hurt like **** to put any pressure on it

 

i still think my most amusing injury was when i got an axe to the foot when i was about 11 years old. i decided i was gonna be helpful and go chop some firewood. so i wandered on out to the paddock in bare feet (bad idea in hindsight...) and grabbed the axe. now at this time i was a frail little pleb, and could barely lift the thing. so i heaved with all my (lack of) might and swung the thing down towards the bit of wood, and... missed...

well i missed the bit of wood anyway, i got a bloody (tehe) good hit on my foot!

[LoneWolf16]

Pop just made me switch from drinking coke to drinking milk....lots of milk....and water.....I'm scared of my coke cans now.

[taks]

i always heard rumors/urban legends that the amount of aluminum you get from drinking a lot of canned beverages contributes to alzheimer's as well.

 

taks

[metadigital]

I try to avoid using aluminium utensils and pots and pans, too, even though the risk from that is negligible.

[taks]

analon rules! best non-stick ever. that and stainless, which, if cared for properly, is very easy to clean.

 

taks