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Random Text RPG Battles


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Rosbjerg tries to cast a spell, only to realize that he's not a mage..

 

He panics - but suddenly the fear seems to leave him - a friendly looking mage smiles at him.

 

Then suddenly he feels a warming sensation and realizes that he concetrated way too hard before.

 

He looks down - and panic again.

Fortune favors the bald.

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  • 5 weeks later...

WILL's squeaky voice pierces the ears of the entire party.

 

Roll 1d4 for damage.

"Alright, I've been thinking. When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade - make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons, what am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager. Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons. Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons. I'm going to to get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!"

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WILL casts meat-vision.

 

Walsingham is instantly hit with a 600-pound cow.

"Alright, I've been thinking. When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade - make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons, what am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager. Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons. Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons. I'm going to to get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!"

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