Reading over these threads I'm still at a loss as to what the issue is here, if the plot calls for romance, then it should have romance. As for sex, its supposed to be a mature game involving human, presumably adult protagonists. No one is saying it should be explicit or graphic, but seeing as sex and sexual attraction are part of human nature, it should at least be present in some form. Personally, I would prefer to play a character with depth, not some sexless, two-dimensional meat robot.
That said, I'm not really a fan of ME style romance sub-plots, which were basically just a tacked on bone an alien minigame. If its going to be in the game, I say make it canonical and non-optional and find a way to tie it into the main plot.